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Carping Diem

diem01082906After a rousing start, The Real World/Road Rules Challenge: Fresh Meat has sort of tapered off lately in the drama department, but last night's episode saw a rousing return to petty squabbles as Diem and Tina went at it like two Chihuahuas passing on the street. It was honestly only the first or second time this Challenge that anyone's flown off the handle, which really is not a lot compared to the preceding Gauntlet II. That season spoiled us with its weekly shouting matches and drunken debauchery. Seemingly anything could set that cast off -- chocolate syrup, the confines of a bus, air. But this time around, everyone's been quieter and more convivial. That is, until tonight. The altercation was a fine return to Challenge form, and if that wasn't enough, we also had a lovely display of Derrick logic, or as it's more commonly known: stupidity.

This week's episode began with the images of flowers. Ah yes, love had to be in the air. Or at least pollen. I thought for sure we'd soon find Derrick and Diem smooching in the Australian bush (no pun intended), but instead, the semi-lovebirds were hanging out in their prison cell (or lodgings, as the producers would call it). The two were extremely excited that Theo and Chanda had been eliminated, and thus they were rid of their biggest competition (or up until a few days prior, their biggest allies. Oops!). Now, nothing could get in their way of that grand prize. "Making it to the final challenge now is extremely important," Diem said, thus insuring that she'll most likely be heading to Exile in the next twenty-two minutes.

Our heartstrings were then generously tugged as Diem tearfully reminded us that she had $60,000 of hospital bills to deal with; hence, she needed the cash super bad. Oh Diem. Don't you know? There's a magical hospital fairy that erases debt for Bunim/Murray stars. Just ask Tonya about her Chicago season! Yay, administrative altruism for the cameras!

Anyway, we skipped the usual scene of teams deciphering some cryptic (read: blatantly obvious) clue about the next challenge and moved right ahead to the next morning as everyone pumped themselves up for the day's event. Some people said they had to go "balls to the wall," some people said they had to "kill it," and everyone else merely wept over their inability to employ an adequate cliché for the situation.

Eventually, everyone congregated at Eagle Farm where host TJ Lavin introduced the day's mighty challenge: "What a Croc." And no, this had nothing to do with consuming vats of Country Crock. For this competition, pairs had to grapple onto a double-ended crocodile (sort of like a dildo, but with jaws) and experience THE DEATH ROLL. Basically, they'd be spun around like a spit in hyperspeed. As soon as a member fell off or touched the pole on which the crocodile was mounted, the time would stop. There would be three rounds, and whichever team had the longest cumulative time would be the winners. Oh, and one more thing. The winning duo would decide BOTH teams going into Exile. Dunh dunh dunh!

This caused gasps all around, but of course, if these kids had done any sort of elementary math, they would have realized that after the day's winners make their pick, that would leave only two other pairs from which to vote someone else into Exile. And of course, that would surely end in a one-on-one tie; so it only makes sense that the winners would get to choose both and--- seriously, why am I even bothering explaining the logic? This is The Challenge. Let's just move on.

Anyway, as the teams prepared to mount their crocodile, Darrell told us, "I'm helping Derrick and Diem out. We're here to look out for each other, just to make it to the final challenge." But wait, wasn't Darrell pissed at Derrick for sending Theo into Exile? Or am I just smoking crack? I don't know. Either way, Darrell saying he was going to look out for Derrick meant either a) he would not be looking out for Derrick or b) Derrick would be backstabbing him sometime in the immediate future.

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Comments (28)

newtrino [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Diem is a typical Marietta girl, entitled bitch thinks the world owes her something.

zevonia [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Great recap, B-Side. I also was shocked and dismayed to find myself on Tina's side. This was so wrong! But man, Diem was the one with the nerve to carry on like that. Who the hell else were Kenny and Tina going to put in? Certainly not Wes and Casey, the weak team they can beat.
I would have loved it if Derrick & Diem had gotten to the finish line first only to be handed a penalty for dropping their bags early. Derrick has muscles where his brains should be. It was odd that both team members had to get the flag because that did not happen before. Way to change the rules mid challenge MTV!
Obviously I want Darrell & Aviv to win but I (cough, gag, can't believe I'm writing this) can live with Tina and Kenny winning- just, please, not Wes!

thatswhack [TypeKey Profile Page]:

what an effin hypocrite. what kenny and tina did was what slutty diem and derrick did last week.

so slutty diem should just shut up.

and may we remind her of linette?

i swear, i wanna grab her hair and pull it off. (excuse my violent reaction...i had a bad day)

raggedy_andy [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Great recap. Very anticlimactic pre-final. There was lots of potential in this season, but many of the things seemed half-baked. For example, I saw the repeat of the Deep Blue (or whatever it was called) challenge and what they should have done is made a point system where the deeper you are the more points you get per second (especially since they were "supposed" to stay under and then come up). Also, one of the reasons why I think there was more drama in previous Challenges is because the teams were bigger, meaning more of a chance for people to disagree with people you need to work with. I like that there were more teams, but two was probably too little.

Anyway, as for why Diem blew up on (at? around?) Tina, it just looked like she realized that she got her bad karma for what she did to others, but didn't want it. She didn't want to admit that they dug their own graves and needed someone else to blame.

I agree what you said about Wes and Casey not being king and queen of the Exile. They're just lucky they packed lighter than most if not all other teams and that they've been in enough to know not to forget flags. As icky as I feel saying it, Tina and Kenny seem like the best Exile team so far since they've actually solved puzzles.

It sucks that Tina and Wes are definitely getting money now. Damn you, Derrick logic! You gave them money.

gatsby [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Thanks for the excellent recap, B-Side.

Derrick's plan in the Exile was quite possibly one of the dumbest things I've ever seen on one of these shows. Did he really think they would let him win the Exile by cheating? It's not like there aren't camera crews right there recording his every move. I wonder why the referees at the puzzle stations didn't say anything to him and Diem about it, though---maybe they figured that since Derrick and Diem would lose anyway they might as well let Derrick look like a fool.

I also found myself loving Tina during that fight. Actually, I've liked Tina through this whole Challenge season. She's had some decent one-liners in her interview segments.

I really, really hope Wes and Casey don't win the final challenge. It's bad enough they're guaranteed money for making it this far. :-p

BonaFide [TypeKey Profile Page]:

I am stoked that Wes and Casey are in the final mission! They are very lucky that there was no pardon mission.

Tina has grown on me. If she and Kenny won this Challenge, I wouldn't mind too much. I just hope Darrell doesn't win. I kinda sorta hate that guy.

Poor Derrick! So close... yet so far away... yet again! I hope MTV helps alleviate some of Diem's financial burdens. Her rantings were completely nonsensical this episode, but my heart went out to her when she told us the real reason why she didn't want to go home. All the best to Diem!

YouWannaBMe [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Ok, I know that I have a totally different point of view on all this so that's why I'm posting this time.

I just want to give a shout out to B-Side for all the entertaining re-caps thus far and especially for this comment which just made me laugh out loud at work:

And what exactly was Derrick keeping in his 94 lbs of luggage? A season's worth of tea cozy hats?).

Classic...

Okay, on to what I thought of this episode. First of all, Diem had no reason to be pissed at Kenny and Tina for voting them into the Exile. Anorexic (and yes, of course she is anorexic, and it is NOT Cancer) Diem should have expected everything to come back to her for all her backstabbing.

I also want to point out that while Tina is NOT the thinnest of the bunch of girls on the challenge (who are mostly anorexic), she is not the "blob" everyone keeps referring to her as. And you gotta love that girl for putting Diem in her place... finally.

I was happy to see that Wes and Casey flew under the radar and made it into the finals. You have to admit that for a team that is "seemingly" weak to the others, they have a great strategy going on, because you KNOW they're a lot better than they look in the challenges. They wouldn't have won all of those Exiles if they weren't. (I shouldn't really say its a strategy, though, since Wes or Casey aren't exactly smart enough to devise ANY strategy in this challenge). They are definitely my pick for the winners of the grand prize. If you look at the previews for next week, it looks as if Casey is going strong (she can kick the rest of the girls' ass at endurance challenges) and reminding Wes of the $250,000 prize while the other teams seem to be way behind and having trouble finishing.

The other teams deserve to eat dust from Wes and Casey for putting them in Exile so many times purely based on the fact that the alumni didn't want one of the Austin cast winning. I hope Wes finally gets his revenge by kicking ass and rubbing their noses in it!! I have been rooting for Wes (prick or not, he's good TV) and Casey all season and I hope to see them win it all!!

MissKatrina [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Thanks, B-Side, you make my morning worthwhile!

Tina is a seasoned veteran of these shows, which means that she has no real career or job skills or ambition, but that she also knows how to play the game. Well-done, Tina. And no, I'm not referring to how she likes her beef.

If that pasty schmoo Wes wins the money, dear God. He'd never stop bragging about it and who knows what stupid crap he'd buy/do with it. Will we be subjected to even more stupid t-shirts?!

mouth [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Like I said, Wes and Casey in the money round. MTV changed their promotion preview, but right after the episode they showed a lot of the final challenge. It looked to me as if Wes and Casey win the challenge. They show Wes carrying all of the bags and Casey standing in front of him cheering him on saying, "250,000 dollars, come on Wes, 250,000 dollars." Then they show the other teams arguing with each other and calling each other idiots. It looks like Wes and Casey take the money. This last mission is in exile form too plus some. All you haters got to give Wes and Casey props. Especially if they win, which I think they will. HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Stefunny77 [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Newtrino--I'm a girl from Marietta, and you have no idea what you are talking about.

Also, I think the reason behind Diem's blowup is simply because this was the first time things didnt go as planned for her and Derrick. This whole game they have been safe, and now they werent and it prolly just hit her that she would maybe go home. sometimes reality like that can make you have an attitude toward an innocent person.

Leah3t [TypeKey Profile Page]:

I found myself loving Tina as well this episode. "This isn't my first challenge! I'm not Fresh Meat!!" was the scorching speech Aneesa was trying to make last season when she was going on about losing weight and some other nonsense.

Why were D and A riding the croc so close to the pole? They kept knocking their heads against the wall.

I really felt horrible for Diem when she said she had gotten to be normal for five weeks. It was so sad.

For some reason whenever Wes starts being a jerk I keep thinking of Casey's mom and dad watching the show. I hope Casey's dad goes and beats Wes up.

Ubiquitous [TypeKey Profile Page]:

I loved how Wes bitched about how Casey was going to fuck up, only to barely be able to hang on for two rotations!

I was happy to see that Wes and Casey flew under the radar and made it into the finals. You have to admit that for a team that is "seemingly" weak to the others, they have a great strategy going on, because you KNOW they're a lot better than they look in the challenges. They wouldn't have won all of those Exiles if they weren't. (I shouldn't really say its a strategy, though, since Wes or Casey aren't exactly smart enough to devise ANY strategy in this challenge).
Like B-Side said, the only reason Wes and Casey win the Exile is because they packed less and didn't forget to grab the flags from the puzzle stations. Speaking of which, I do not recall them ever requiring both partners be present to take the flag.

Is it too late for a kangeroo to wander onto the challenge course and maul Wes? A guy can dream, right?

Roney12 [TypeKey Profile Page]:

I adore Tina, she is great. She tells it like it is and doesn't take shit. I hope she wins and Diem is getting what she did. I can't wait to see who wins. GO TINA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

susanarosa [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Ths is the first time in a long time that I can honestly say that I actually like all of the contestants in the final. Of cours,e I'd rather see Darrell and Aviv win because they've been the strongest all season, I really wouldn't mind if Tina/Kenny or Wes/Casey pull it off.

And did anyone else catch the clip from next week where Casey is pulling the rope that that is connecting her to Wes and said "25,000 dollars, bitch" Love that girl.

babeblue [TypeKey Profile Page]:

tina is so crazy, but you had to give it to her this episode.

only she could make calling a cancer patient "anorexic ass" into a funny moment.

i heard that diem is on another challenge, so it seems that she is doing well, which is great. but she really got put in her place by tina.

babeblue [TypeKey Profile Page]:

go tina and kenny!!

dent [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Stefunny and Newtrino, I thought that Diem was from Roswell. Because that is a much more pretentious area than Marietta to me!! That would explain her need to throw a fit over a game when she has cancer to deal with...

I know from experience as half my sorority at UGA was Marietta and ROswell!

stacyrocks [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Oh God, I hope Wes & Casey don't win it all.

The Svan [TypeKey Profile Page]:

The Svan applauds Derecks move. They were screwed anyways, so why not take the chance and try and rely on the puzzles. There was no vehicle next to the final puzzle so it most likely was "drop the rest of your bags". There was no rule against dropping the bags immediately and banking on the puzzle as far as the Svan knows.

B-Side - You are the greatest. Hilarious recap once again.

"think I'm going to do that to random people now. I'll just march up to someone and yell, "Your words mean NOTHING!" I then might add, "You just got Diem-ed!"

That was the best! LMFAO

bexwrex [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Good lord B-Side, how long have you been waiting to use that title/wordplay? It must be such a relief to let it out.

hardly@work [TypeKey Profile Page]:

I shecked out mtv overdrive today and diem says she has finished chemo and will find out in a few days (I have no idea when this was taped) if the cancer is gone.

casey's after the show is pretty funny, i forgot about the lesbian- evelyn? that was trying to hook up with casey, too bad she got eliminated first, that would have been funny

hollabackboy [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Diem was really being a sore loser if you ask me. Besides, who is she to talk about friendship and loyalty when she's the one who threw her so-called best friend Linette in just weeks ago? Very hypocritical. I'm glad Tina told her off because all she was doing was playing the game. If Derrick & Diem had won, they would've paired Tina & Kenny off with Wes & Casey anyway.

And, Derrick throwing down the bags during the exile? That was cheating and it's karma that bit him in the ass and made them lose. Even if they would have crossed the finish line, someone on production would have said something about the dropping their bags when they started. Really dumb move.

And as far as the winner goes, Tina's going to be on the After Show next week. So I've got my money on her & Kenny. Besides, she's never won a challenge, and she's probably the only alumni left I like. So I'd like to see her win.

GiadaFan [TypeKey Profile Page]:

I think what made Diem's rant more funny was that she had her stylish aviator glasses and she tried to do a little head nod w/ attitude. Oh no she di'int!

As much as I wanted to see Wes get the axe, it's funny that he and Casey made it to the final by just quitting most of the challenges. It'd be great to see them win just because people despise Wes. Casey is bearable, especially since she's putting up with that a-hole to get some money.

Seeing Tina win with Kenny would be great as well, especially she's a wanna-be Coral. And plus, Kenny could show off his handsome face and nose injury at the winner's podium.

antebellum [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Can't say I'm surprised at Diem's outburst. Of course it was very hypocritical, but that's a typical move from Bunim/Murray cast members--any time they personally are attacked, they lash out against the very things they themselves are guilty of. I did feel badly for her, though, but it looks as though she's well enough to go on the next Challenge (and probably several after that), so good for her. I also felt badly for Derrick, will he ever win a Challenge? (Remember, if he does, he won't be coming back to each and every one.)

I'm rooting for either Wes and Casey or Tina and Kenny. I really enjoy watching both teams, and Darrell and Aviv bore me. I've liked Tina all season (which is unusual) as well as Kenny, and Wes and Casey have come this far, so either team winning will be fine with me.

Chee-Z-TeeVee Addict [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Diem seems like a bitch. Derrick is a douche-bag.

I also found myself in the shocking position of rooting for Tina, but she was 100% in the right.

Kenny is a babe.

My money is on Darrell and Aviv winning because they are both good athletes, Darrell probably won't have to carry Aviv to the same extent that Wes and Kenny will have to compensate for Casey and Tina.

mouth [TypeKey Profile Page]:

Aviv is actually the worst competitor out of the girls if you ask me. She has done nothing this challenge. I'm telling you, its gonna be wes and casey that win. If you saw the first previews, MTV gave it away. The reason that Wes and Casey made it to the end is because everyone started to fear them because they sent so many people home in the exile. Remember what Theo said, "you just buried yourself, we're going to send you in till you go home." And Wes said, "keep sending me in, I'll send you all home one by one." Everyone started to fear going into exile with Wes and Casey. They will win the challenge, if the preview was correct.

partysunflower [TypeKey Profile Page]:

I know who wins i read in a spoiler somewhere. I also know the entire cast and winners of the next challenge. "the Duel" I gues that makes me feel special. I want to tell someone.

Oh yeah and B-side i really love your recaps, you are the best ever!! No other compares.

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