This week on The Gauntlet 3, we learn some very valuable lessons: Only try to fuck your own team over if you're 100% sure you'll do so successfully, Dear God, know when your boyfriend's got some issues to work out, and don't let your balls be the first thing to hit the ice water.
The answer was "Ice Cold" by the way
We open where we seem to open every week lately: with a clue. The clue tells us that the players need to cool off. We already know from the previews we saw this week that the players are in a tank of ice water and Diem looks like my vegetarian friend did that time we got her highly intoxicated and told her the next day that she had eaten a hamburger.
I've been thinking all week about how this is the worst possible challenge I can imagine. I can't even go into the ocean, it's too cold. I'm one of those people who lays out at the beach until I'm too hot to stand the heat, walks down to the water, let the water hit my feet, and then decides maybe I'll just pour a little luke warm Poland Spring on myself instead. Needless to say, give me a jacuzzi with some bubbles and a glass of Santa Margherita or stick your tub up your ass.
The Veteran guys continue the "dead weight" speeches and are determined to throw the mission to get rid of Katie. Aw, see "trim the fat" was annoying before, but now it's just mean. In preparation for the big challenge, some of the Veteran guys decide to get team Mohawks to inspire some team unity. Unity huh? Yes there's nothing like a little team unity on your way into a mission you're about to throw get rid of your own teammate.
When the teams arrive for the challenge the next morning, the boys are wearing nothing but embarrassingly tight shorts and hideous black shoes. I'm not sure what I think about this ensemble, but there is one thing I am reasonably certain of:
There are a bunch of yoga instructors out there who can only find their tops
The teams are walked into a freezer and told that the challenge requires them to sit in a tank of ice water for various periods of time. If at any time anyone wants to quit, they are free to leave. No sooner than TJ gets this last piece of information out, does CT walk over to the tank, stick his hand in it and then quit. Moments later CT is in the confessional telling us very matter of factly that he quit because he didn't want to ruin his Mohawk. Then everyone I'm in the room with laughs because we know it was really out of fear of people seeing his pee pee in cold water.
Slowly but surely the vets quit one by one until it's just Danny versus 4 or 5 of the rookies. I had started wondering what Danny was doing trying so hard, but after seeing Danny pretend to wash his armpits with the ice water, I chalked it up to sheer cockiness. Incidentally, this cocky move worked much better when Wes did it by doing pull ups from the rope while hanging mid air during one of the tougher challenges back during Fresh Meat. Anyway, what we've learned here is that if you're going to attempt cocky, it might be best to wait until after you've taken off your spandex shorts and skull cap. Just a suggestion.
Now here's where the drama starts. The rookies ask Danny what he's doing still hanging around on a female gauntlet day, and Danny tells them that he'll quit if they all agree to save him at the next male gauntlet. Ah, tricky tricky, Danielson. But it will never work. Meanwhile, this conversation is accompanied by subtitles so we know exactly what is being said. It's also how we know we're going to see this conversation come back up later. MTV loves to use subtitles in their editing when they're about to make someone look like a liar or a hypocrite. It's one of the pages in the MTV guide to blatant foreshadowing.
Anyway, back to the freezer. Everyone agrees to The Deal That Was Not a Deal except for Frank, and so the competition must proceed as scheduled. That's fine by Danny though, because he "can go all day." I'll tell you what Mr. Steroid, not with miniature gonads you can't. Five minutes later Danny quits, walks out of the freezer and collapses into a position that suggests he's dying of hypothermia....
Or about to start a triathlon
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Comments (7)
i believe that frank told katie to her face that he wanted to keep her around because she'd suck in the last challenge. and i think it wasn't really a threat to their friendship because he was just being honest and not meanspirited.
and i think frank and CT were both just joking about fighting... playing it up for the cameras, even, and adam misinterpreted the situation which was enough to send him closer to total douchebag mode.
looks like the big guy collapses in the final mission - wonder what happens to the vets then?
1 of 7 | Posted by jesshloly | Posted on March 18, 2008 6:54 PM
Great recap.
CT is a douche, and most certainly has anger management and alcohol issues.
But, my GAWD, is he smoking hot!
There you have the reason why sweet little Diem probably puts up with his crap.
2 of 7 | Posted by snarky | Posted on March 18, 2008 7:07 PM
I agree w/snarky. CT IS smoking hot. I think his hotness excuses the asshole/douchebag/bad hair/violent alchoholic....I really can't stand Adam. He's such a little bitch. I'm sure when the vets see how he "threw" the challenge, they'll all want to pour beers or fists onto his head.
3 of 7 | Posted by Poopsicle | Posted on March 19, 2008 6:49 AM
I don't care how hot CT is, he is a terrible person. I can't stand him AT ALL! He is too much of a jerk. Even though I'm not on the "I love Kenny train" I'm glad that he said that CT was an asshole about the whole thing. Other than that, I didn't understand why the rookies wouldn't follow Frank's advice. Saving Adam isn't going to ruin the Rookies chances of winning.
4 of 7 | Posted by MrsBojangles | Posted on March 19, 2008 1:15 PM
'salty' is the new 'cut the fat.' so help me if i was on the show i'd introduce "cut the salt" and be team leader. i ain't ascared of no heights.
this show was built for drinking games.
high quality entertainment.
5 of 7 | Posted by k37744 | Posted on March 19, 2008 4:36 PM
Thank goodness, I was worried you were one of those raving CT fangirls, McSteeny. Putting up with and excusing that much belligerent douchebagginess just screams desperate to me. Are there really no other "hot" guys out there that this @sshole gets defended? I'll never understand the masochists. I was hoping he would hit someone and get sent home so that he wouldn't have a shot at the money, but, alas, Ryan and Tyler weren't there anymore.
Personally, I could've done without the knowledge that Danny tastes salty. What an idiot though. Even if you can "go all day," the guys on your team aren't going to like that you didn't throw the mission like they wanted. +4 interwebz points for the Karate Kid reference, but it's "Daniel-san" (it's Japanese and, yeah, I'm that geeky; big whoop, wanna fight about it?).
6 of 7 | Posted by angelic_shy_sweet_guy | Posted on March 20, 2008 8:37 PM
if you're looking for some finale commentary, there's some here: thesexylife.blogspot.com
7 of 7 | Posted by jesshloly | Posted on March 21, 2008 9:11 AM