Apologies for the delays, Gasmii. I was working on my "A game" and "visualizing" my recap and perfecting my "air quotes". And trying to scrape my brain to eliminate this image:
Shall we?
Because of the stress of the Ruins, our fragile team members need to blow off steam. Will someone please start a foundation for these kids already? I mean, they're in Thailand! In a villa! With a pool! But they have to engage in athletic competitions!
So stress relief involves the most boring game of Truth or Dare which involves Rumer flirting with Kenny (or not), Kim jumping in the pool topless, Casey mooning everyone, and Cohutta smelling Susie's hair -- standard Appalachian mating call.
The only moment of moderate interest was Evan telling us that "Kenny and myself were coming back from the pool" and they heard something. Again, using "myself" does not automatically make you sound smart.
But that wasn't the moderately interesting part. That was when Kenny and Evan (himself) walked in on Kim and Dumbar in the bathroom, half-naked and talking about strategy. Because -- as everyone knows -- it's much easier to talk strategy if your boobs are hanging out.
Brad is peeved that Casey is still around and ruining the Challengers' chances for a win. Evan, Chin Pubes and Darrell are also talking about how the Challengers messed up by not getting rid of her when they had the opportunity. Casey, completely oblivious to her surroundings, asks Evan what are chances are. Then she starts air quoting all over the place and I turn off my television.
To her credit, Casey has figured out that her team loathes her. She also figured out that the Champions like her from a challenge standpoint but she thinks they like her as a person. I'm not so sure. Evan compares her to a nervous, non-athletic chihuahua and promises that if the Champions win, she won't go in. Casey thanks him with a feather puppet show.
Kellyanne, Rumer, Dumbar and Brad are discussing the Casey Situation. Kellyanne thinks that if the Challengers win, Casey will volunteer herself because she's the only one who hasn't gone in. There are two things wrong with this: One, the Challengers will not win. And two, if they did, Casey, as dumb as she is, is not dumb enough to offer herself to an individual athletic competition.
On the Champions side, Jo-nada and Susie agree that, if they win, Nada will offer to go into the Ruins since she hasn't yet. Susie and Nada also explain to Kenny that they thought about throwing the challenge because they only way to ensure that they can go up against Casey is if the Challengers win. At this point, the alliance is useless to the girls because they have nothing to lose.
And the clue: Tomorrow's challenge will start a revolution. Even Tyramail is more creative than this crap.
Everyone is trying to figure out how to handle elimination. The Champion guys decide that Evan and Kenny are up next based on some sort of rotation they claim has been happening all along. Darrell volunteers himself as the third. They agree that whoever goes into the Ruins this time can pick their competitor and is allowed to make it to the finals.
On the Challenger side, there's no issue since there are only three guys left -- Brad, Dumbar and Cohutta -- so if they win, they'll flip a coin to see who goes into the Ruins. The consensus is that Cohutta will end up going in if the Champions win because he has $18,500 in his account compared to the $2,000 in each of Brad's and Dumbar's.
TJ repeats his speech about the challenges but I think the job has finally gotten to him. Look at the veins in his neck! He's straining just to squeak out his lines! Maybe someone stole his stash.
And the nominees are . . . Nada and Susie, and Evan, Kenny and Darrell on the Champion side. And Dumbar, Brad and Cohutta, and Kim, Rumer and Casey for the Challengers. There are "myselfs" everywhere and my ears are bleeding.
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Comments (20)
I hate that Cohutta went home, as much as they want to say they picked him for the money, truth is Darrell probably went for Cohutta figuring that it meant he would win for sure. I'm gonna miss having him around while Bananas still is, ugh I hate that guy. On a positive note Johanna went home, yay!
1 of 20 | Posted by MichyPR | Posted on November 16, 2009 2:34 AM
TinyElvis!
Great re-cap. As I watch and hear Casey saying crap like, "jump on my bandwagon" I think, "TinyElvis has enough to rip this girl a new one"....and you don't disappoint.
I hope the puncher is Darrell, I hate his face. Maybe the punchee is Brad? The first episode clips of "This season on The Ruins" showed Brad laid out on the floor with a little blood dripping down his cro-magnon forehead.We can only hope.
Thanks for the entertainment.
2 of 20 | Posted by joy1333 | Posted on November 16, 2009 4:43 AM
I was thinking Johanna purposefully lost because she didn't want to eventually go against KellyAnne, knowing KellyAnne would be out for blood.
That or either she wanted to get home early and have some alone time with Wus..........
3 of 20 | Posted by LisaMay | Posted on November 16, 2009 6:07 AM
Yay for another blisteringly funny recap, TinyElvis! I love how you do these fucking kids who have somehow turned this damned show into their full-time job.
I wonder does Brad know just how much of a dumbass he looks in pretty much every single frame of every single minute of every single interview he's ever done in every single show on MTV? He reminds of those guys who like to talk about football plays (that they performed in high school) like they're the most important thing that ever happened. And what the hell happened to Evan's bod? Maybe he stopped the 'roids cuz his balls were shrivelling up? He definitely looks paunchy in a way I've never seen before. And I love paunchy. But not on him, blech.
Awesome job, can't wait for Dildo Johnny Bananas to go home. OH, and can someone please retell the story as to why and how he got that nickname? I seem to remember it was something really awful and I'm curious all over again.
Thanks for the great recap, TinyElvis, you're kicking ass!
love, J-Mo :)
4 of 20 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on November 16, 2009 6:34 AM
I feel like Johanna started acting like she wanted to go home the second she knew she was going into the ruins because she doesn't have a spit of athletic talent and knew she would lose. She took the easy road out by pretending to not care and be over it so that she wouldn't be embarrassed when she lost going into her first one on one challenge yet. I guess riding coattails is pretty easy until someone calls you out on it.
on a second note, i think she wasn't into it as MUCH because Wes went home.
And can Evan please please pleaaaaaase go home.
Casey may not be the sharpest tack in the toolbox but at least she doesn't take herself too seriously.
And KellyAnne needs to punch the doctor in the face who added those monstrosities to her chest. Refund Gap anyone.
If it is Syrus who landed the punch- what an IDIOT. if you're gonna hand out your money like that next time keep it together till you win and then you can write me the check. thanks.
At least if it is Brad laid out on the floor... we won't have to hear Tori say "Babe" for an hour straight.
And ug. Susie. just go away.
Man is there anyone left to vote for? Maybe Sarah cuz she's the underdog and the newbie.
5 of 20 | Posted by hollagirl2 | Posted on November 16, 2009 6:34 AM
Is it me or does it look like Kelly Anne had her lips done after this challenge. Because when you see her on the actual show it doesnt look that bad,but in all the interviews(which i'm guessing are done after the show is done) it looks like she got some serious Botox.
6 of 20 | Posted by sweetstarshine1 | Posted on November 16, 2009 8:56 AM
Great recap Tiny. I thought is was Derrick that was out cold on the floor in the previews. I could be wrong cause they only showed it for a second.
7 of 20 | Posted by SBC123 | Posted on November 16, 2009 10:42 AM
hollagirl2: I think you mean Darrell. Syrus got kicked off two weeks ago.
8 of 20 | Posted by jayball | Posted on November 16, 2009 11:57 AM
I don't know, I like Brad and if Darrell punched Brad I hope they send Darrell home and give Brad his money :P
9 of 20 | Posted by MichyPR | Posted on November 16, 2009 12:08 PM
I'm so glad you've called them out on the misuse of "myself," the air quotes, and everything Casey says. Another thing that drives me crazy is the lack of adverbs! Brad said, "Casey doesn't take the game as serious as everyone else," at least 3 times this episode. It's awful, but I just can't help but to notice haha
Other than that, I really don't like Susie. She wasn't bad on this episode, but she's usually really hypocritical and stuck up. I just get a sour taste from her.
Great job on the recaps! I hardly ever post but I read it every week, you have me laughing every time :)
10 of 20 | Posted by kelseym13 | Posted on November 16, 2009 1:36 PM
oops thanks for catching that jayball. waaay too early in the morning for me during that rant!
11 of 20 | Posted by hollagirl2 | Posted on November 16, 2009 2:21 PM
I'm pretty sure it's Derek that Darrell punched. And if it is as obvious as they made it look in the preview, Darrell is going home for sure. Considering he is a boxer and personal trainer, I have to think that is one hell of a punch he throws. If he goes home, for some reason I am thinking they will split all his money evenly between his team, but I could be wrong. When Tonya went home, isn't that what happened?
12 of 20 | Posted by blazergirl | Posted on November 16, 2009 2:55 PM
Funny recap TinyElvis, as always I enjoyed you making fun of Evan as much as possible.
J-Mo: on mm-agency.com it says that Johnny got his bananas nickname from Penn State friends because of his "crazy behavior" (air quotes, Casey?) but I think that's a load of bull. It was definitely something to do with his tiny penis, I think.
13 of 20 | Posted by congratsmeathead | Posted on November 16, 2009 3:00 PM
In the "Nice physique." screengrab of Evan, I thought "Well, he does have six-pack abs", then I realised it was his enlarged liver showing. My mistake.
J-Mo: I love paunchy as well, it's the combo of paunchy and pasty that isn't working for me.
14 of 20 | Posted by sodagirl | Posted on November 16, 2009 8:35 PM
Wasn't there a rumor that the whole Bananas thing stemmed from a story about how once he was hooking up with a girl and either he was too small or he couldn't get it up so he shoved a banana in her? I'm not sure.
15 of 20 | Posted by MichyPR | Posted on November 17, 2009 12:52 AM
The "myselfs" are out of control. I bet someone said it one time, and the rest thought it sounded smart and now they just can't wait to announce who is going in the ruins just so the person can say MYSELF.
16 of 20 | Posted by winks523 | Posted on November 17, 2009 9:22 AM
I remember Johnny Bananas talking about it on a reunion show. He put on a speedo, also known as a banana-hammock, and that's where the nickname came from.
17 of 20 | Posted by Thatswhatshesaid | Posted on November 17, 2009 11:42 AM
Great recap! I'm glad I'm not the only one annoyed by the misuse and overuse of "myself".
It is Brad that gets in a fight with Darrel. Brad had a black eye they tried to cover up on the Duel II reunion. Darrel got in trouble over it because he is some kind of golden gloves boxing champ, and I guess that sort of thing is frowned upon in that industry. (I'm a baseball fan, I don't know anything about boxing)
I was real sad to see Cohutta go home. The kiss with Susie at the end is strange because according to MTV's biography on her, she's married.
18 of 20 | Posted by blairwaldorf | Posted on November 17, 2009 2:41 PM
"its because when he was havin sex with his girlfriend, she wanted him to go deeper but couldnt, so he grabbed a banana (use ur imagination)
eventually, his friends walked in on him
Source(s):
kelly anne explained it"
Found this somewhere. I remember hearing something like that somewhere.
19 of 20 | Posted by MichyPR | Posted on November 18, 2009 6:26 AM
Awesome as ever recap, TinyElvis! Alright, I know this is not near as interesting as the rumored theories about "Johnny Bananas'" nickname's origin, but his last name is "DeveNANzio," so it would seem somewhat logical that the nickname "Bananas" has a lot to do with his last name, but judging from his completely defective, waste-of-space personality/existence, I would also add that it's entirely plausible that there is probably something rather foul behind the possible last-name connection origin as well. And seriously, people, have you SEEN his hair?! "I'm Mister Green Christmas. I'm Mister Sun. I'm Mister Heat Blister--I'm Mister Hundred and One..." :P
20 of 20 | Posted by jerzgrrrl72 | Posted on November 24, 2009 8:04 PM