Real World Cancun Finale: Some Things Don't Heal
Hola! Bienvenido! Eh, that's all I got. Here's the Real World, last day in Cancun!
Could you be more specific?
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September 13, 2009
September 8, 2009
Real World: The Zombie Hitler Tap Dance Episode
Welcome back to The Real World Cancun! May-juh (I know, that wasn't Mexican, but I have to practice my Victoria Beckham too, you know) props to MIchy PR for translating Rihanna's email to Scrawny Pat from last week! The best part was when she bragged about Scrawny being in it for the cameras with Jassy, but definitely not with her. Hearts, Michy PR! Thanks for ruining your eyesight for the....um, cause? And now, for the latest...
It's cuz Rihanna's in heat.
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August 29, 2009
Real World: Scrawny Pat Counts to Three
This week, on the Real World, the first half of the show is the threesome and the second half is everyone talking about it. Probably the best episode of the Real World in a while! Well, it had the inter-roomie threesome, so it kind of wins by default, but - and I can't believe I'm saying this - I was actually wondering what was going to happen next!
Fingers crossed that it's not this.
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August 26, 2009
Real World Cancun: Romantic Square
Welcome back to the Real World Cancun! Tonight, it's all about class.
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August 18, 2009
Real World: The Ballad of the Only Person to Not Get F ed in Cancun
Welcome back to the Real World Cancun! Ding, dong the herpes is dead! Tonight, the star of the show is Jasmine!, her four feet of drama,
...and a bottle of Two Buck Chuck.
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August 11, 2009
Real World Cancun: Scab Be Gone!
Welcome back to the Real World Cancun! I am delighted to report that the public herpes outbreak in Cancun is no longer a threat! Read on for details...
Bad hair, however, is still a menace.
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August 4, 2009
Real World Cancun: You're So Almost Maybe Kinda Fired Not
Welcome back to the Real World Cancun! I don't mind telling you, I've spent the week hating Mexico. I've had a horrible sore throat / achy / coughing / fever / vomiting thing that a quick check on the internet had me convinced was Swine Flu. I'm all about the self diagnosis, by the way. In my time, I have misdiagnosed myself with everything from a brain anneurism to pregnancy. Luckily, Xanax has cured them all.
So, while I spent the week hating Mexico and everything related for giving me the Swine...turns out I just have a wretched case of tonsillitis. Did you know that your tonsils disappear as you get older? Crazy, huh? Where do they go? And what was my point here? I don't think I had one. I think I just wanted to tell my Swine Flu story. So anyways, now that I don't have the Swine and don't hate Mexico, let's get on with the show.
How many times in one episode can Rhianna showcase her baby maker? The answer will astound you.
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July 24, 2009
Real World: We Would Like To Thank the Internet Voters
Welcome back to another installment of the Real World Cancun! And it's time for this season's relevant social issue affecting young people today. So now, without further adieu, I give you Cutting! The Musical, starring Ayiiia and a pair of cuticle scissors.
Mary had a little ... cat.
Little cat.
Little cat.
NO NO NO THIS IS ALL WRONG
Lisa had a little...goat.
Dammit! Once I get this figured out I'm gonna be a STAR!
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July 21, 2009
Real World: Don't Call Me Fat
Welcome back to another tequila dipped episode of the Real World Cancun! When we last saw the roomies, we had gone from zero to lesbian lovers to mortal enemies in two short episodes. Someone's evil twin will show up any minute now.
You hang tight, John. I'm gonna go bang a hostess and dump a gay hooker. BRB.
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July 9, 2009
Real World: Vowel Love
Welcome back to what I'm calling the Perfect Real World Storm in Cancun! We've had fighting, flirting, sex, drinking, herpes, destruction of property, tears...the list goes on, and that's even before tonight's lesbian roommate lovers who become arch enemies before episode's end. And we're only in the third week! We still have swine flu to look forward to! Ready for mas?
Either close the gap or shut your mouth at least part of the time. You're making us uncomfortable.