But before we take it on the road, we need to hear more from Katelynn about her femininity and sexuality. Set to the visual of Katelynn on a stripper pole. Katelynn's got some skills. Good therapy for becoming a girl. But then she takes the show up to Ryan's room to show Baya some of her moves. "Put some pants on!" yells Ryan.

200902151954
Thank God! I had a dream you grew back!

"I do have pants on!" Katelynn yells back. Ryan tells us he can just look at her and tell she used to be a guy. So he's the fucking expert. But then he follows her over to the confessional and overhears her saying that she's only "been in this body a short time" and that she's still getting used to it.

This information travels around the car later that night, with Ryan, Chet and JD. Ryan repeats what he heard, as evidence of Katelynn having once been a boy. And JD, who held her and cried with her the first week when she spilled her big secret? "She had her surgery done in Thailand," he mentions from the back seat, "right before she came here."

"She chopped off her wiener!" Ryan yells in what I can only describe as gleeful amazement. JD warns the boys that they need to let her come out on her own terms, and that whatever he just told them "didn't come from me". What an asshole. And JD's the big "advocate". Of gossiping, maybe.

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Fine example of why any man would want to chop off their wiener.

And then it's time for the road trip to Gettysburg! "It's seven o' clock. It's wake up time," Ryan informs us. And then proceeds to grab a pot and a spoon from the kitchen and marches through the house clanging on the pot and waking everyone up. I'm sitting comfortably at the Coffee Bean and I'm ready to reach through the screen and strangle him. I can only imagine what it's like to be awakened by this. I can, but I'm not going to. Everyone just sort of tolerates it, until Katelynn attacks him.

"I haven't had my coffee yet. I haven't had my estrogen yet. I'm a bitch at this point," she tells us gloriously. Only women can say stuff like this. Of course Katelynn wanted to be one. Then she goes into Ryan's room, snatches his alarm clock, and throws it out her window while Devyn cheers her on. Ryan complains. "He didn't expect someone to do that to his alarm clock? I would have done it a long time ago," Dev informs us, then adds, "had I been sleeping in clothes."

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Kisses, ho.

They finally all get out of the house, and we learn that there will be two separate cars going to Gettysburg, the boys car and the girls car. It was Chet's idea, cause he might be secretly gay, but Ryan loves it because if he had to be in the car with any one of those girls, someone wouldn't make it to Gettysburg alive. And Ryan's kind of screwed up like that, so I totally believe him.

They get into their separate cars, and the fighting begins. Even from opposite cars. Ryan refuses to give the girls car the address of where they're going in case they get separated, and everyone's still pissed at everyone over the whole wake up call. "It's Gettysburg, it will still be there in an hour," says Devyn.

And the petty drama continues, even from separate cars. The girls don't like how the boys are going. They think the boys are going in circles, and the freeway's right there, so the girls hop on, and now they're separated. Without an address. Sarah has joined her interview in one of those fifties housewife power bitch do-rags.

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I can bring home the bacon, m'kay?

Dramatic music plays in the background while we view the freeway. Will the girls make it to Gettysburg? Will there be a fight about it? Will the rest of the season be this insipid? Who knows, but Ryan's mad about the girls breaking off. "They're the worst people to caravan with!" he sputters.

And finally, we get to Gettysburg. And Ryan's brother Aaron is in the parking lot of the double decker Gettysburg tour bus. The boys pull into the parking lot just as the tour bus lumbers out of the parking lot, and Aaron suggests catching up with the bus. Good natured laughing and male bonding ensue, while the boys drive along and jump aboard the tour bus to the tune of a catchy pop song. Good times in Gettysburg.

Real World Brooklyn: "I Haven't Had My Coffee Yet. I Haven't Had My Estrogen Yet. I'm A Bitch At This Point." Sections:  1  |  2  |  3  |  4  |  5  |  6 

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Comments (21)

spacevenus:

This season is so boring, I keep forgetting the roommates' names.

The boys are much too condescending.
Katelynn is really starting to get on my nerves with her behavior. Also, that piece of hair perpetually in her face just pisses me off.
Not to be mean, but she spent all this money on her surgeries, couldn't she do something about her ears too? I can't imagine it would add much to her bottom line, and she was under anyway.

kmh5125:

i'd like to know which gettysburg ryan is from. there might not be a strip club in gettysburg... but there is in the next town over. all you have to do is hop down the road about 15 minutes. i'm kind of embarassed to say this, but my hometown, hanover, is 20 minutes away from g-burg and ryan is really making us look bad. we're not all as narrow minded as him, i promise!

great recap as always chickbomb.. you always make the episodes seem more entertaining than they really are

BlahBlah:

I'm not finished reading yet but this is already one of your funniest recaps ever, CB. You deserve a raise.

"Gettysburg must be a really tiny town if the midway point through the tour is also the starting point. And the finishing point."

This explains so much about why Ryan thinks he's an Alpha male -> small pond/big fish.

Katelyn is a hot mess. I really dislike her. No one wants to see your formerly dude bits, okay. It would be different if you were a hot transgender but you're not.

I somehow really like Chet. He's funny and confident in his own skin (or at least fakes it well).

This season is so boring that it's becoming entertaining - kinda like how something is so ugly it starts becoming cute (see Troll Doll).

BlahBlah:

Also, Ryan was a total hypocrite for waking the roommates up noisily when he bitched at JD for waking him up with the shaving cream. What happened to sleep being sacrosanct? Whatta douche.

angelbayyb:

that was hysterrical.. i kno this season is boring but the boys making fun of the girls actually had me laughing for a while.. especially "ill lead, yuk yuk yuk yuk" lol
also the title of this recap had me rollin since i was disturbed by this line when i saw the show
also.. i hate watching confessionals of scott bc..
HE NEVER BLINKS. why? he looks like he has no eyelids and his eyes are crazy glued all the way open

loves2play05:

Devyn needs to just shut her trap sometimes!! She just loves throwing the word "collegiate" around all the time. Damn, it's like the only word she learned in college.

mrngstar:

i'm actually finding this season of the real world entertaining. i don't mind any of the people too much. i think it's a nice group of people that make up the real world this season. i'm so over the "over-acting & reacting," as in all the fighting, bitching, & skanking of real worlds past.

Thatswhatshesaid:

Katelynn does not look like a woman. I'm sorry that disappoints her, but she's got to do a lot more to look feminine than walk around nearly naked. And, as a woman, I'm offended that she thinks femininity and sexuality can be garnered by working it out on a stripper pole. Since when were strippers held up to be the standard on femininity?
I laughed at your "She thought she'd be the hottie who pranced around in her panties" (I paraphrased). She was wrong; she's no Melinda and all the boys agreed as they covered their faces and complained loudly.
And last thing, Devyn was SO SHAMED when JD shut her down! In her FACE! That was priceless. She's a fraud and she can try to talk her way out of it and deceive herself into believing she's college-educated, but if I sat in a garage for a year, it still wouldn't make me a car.

andreak1013:

As much as it pains me, I also have to side with the boys when they take off the morning of the bike ride without the girls. Though I would have wanted to kill Ryan for waking me up by clanging a pot, I find it every bit as aggravating when I set a time with my girlfriends to go out, show up at that time completely ready, and then have to sit around for another good 30-45 minutes while they take their sweet time putting on the finishing touches (or in some cases, deciding AT THAT POINT to just start showering). So Katelynn, when you say "God forbid they have to wait for anyone," I say God forbid indeed, because that shit is annoying.

That being said, I am starting to get incredibly put off by Devyn's extreme insecurities covered up by extreme self-righteousness. First the Scott thing ("I'm not jealous, I'm ANNOYED") and now the college dropout business. She's obviously bothered by the fact that she didn't finish college, or she wouldn't drop the fact that she's studied something at a "collegiate level" so much. This episode was the SECOND TIME she has done it. Let me tell you, I'm in the middle of writing a thesis about the history of the circus in America and you can bet that when I'm done writing it, I'll also be done talking about it unless someone specifically asks. Let me also tell you something, Devyn. You're offended that JD put you in the same category as a college dropout? Well, I'm offended that you put yourself in the same category as me when I'm working my ass off and you left halfway through to pursue acting. Not that I would ever judge someone for going the acting route, but you're obviously hell-bent on people respecting that you've studied at the collegiate level. If you're so worried about the negative connotations that come along with the title (and yes, "not finishing college" is synonymous with "college dropout," and it's NOT that big of a deal unless you let it be....which you obviously do) maybe you should have just gotten the freaking degree. That way, when you wax poetic about your infinite knowledge, you might have a smidgen of credibility.

kelsey:

I completely sided with the guys in this episode (and pretty much every other one). With the waking up with the lid and spoon thing, didn't they all agree to wake up and go to Gettysburg? So I have to believe that they decided on a time and Ryan didn't just pick one right before he went to bed, they had to have been anticipating it.

And Devyn, you are a college dropout...sorry. You didn't complete college, so you just are one.

And I completely laughed out loud at so many things this episode.
"There's 20 bucks out the window...literally."
"I'm not immature!" wearing a giant foam cowboy hat.
Chet's imitation of Katelynn, "the pole wasn't even greased properly."
"I'll lead, blahblahblah."

NotWithoutMyTV:

andreak1013:

NO WAY!!!! I'm writing a thesis about little yappy show dogs and the people that own them! We should sooooo collaborate!!!!!

Katelynn should get a refund, and instead of cash, she should ask for Thai sex dollars. (They're like Disney Dollars, only... different.)

vegasdarling:

Why the hell don't Devyn and Sarah just say they ran out of money or are taking a break to "find themselves" instead of flat-ou saying, "Yeah, I quite college, but I'm not a dropout." At least the people I know get creative with their excuses.

Pixi-Stix:

Normally I would say JD was being a douche for telling Devyn she's a college dropout (it may be true, but it's rude most times), but after her nonsensical yelling at him she deserved it.

And yes, she IS a college dropout. Either you finish or you don't. No matter what the reason may be.

Kara:

I must agree, Devyn has no right to categorize herself with the rest of us who DID complete college and received our degrees. I worked my butt off for over 6 years, so for her to insinuate that, on a "collegiate level" we are one and the same, is incorrect.

I wouldnt want the stigma of "college dropout" attached to me either, but like a poster up there said... you can say you are taking time off, or money is running short, or something like that. Thats actually extremely common with the economy as shaky as it is, so no one would think less of her. More people would likely think less of her for actually believing her grandeur illusions that she isn't a college drop out.

LanguageCity:

Everyone has a Katelynn in their life... the friend who you hate going into public with cause you never know when they're going to be embarrassingly inappropriate. Urgh.

This comic made me think of her... sorry for the link, but it's highly appropriate: www.explosm.net/db/files/Comics/Rob/stripperfireman.png

Also I can't decide whether to hate Sarah or love her. She always comes off as trying too hard, but sometimes she's genuinely awesome. Also, I miss RW Hollywood's nicknames.

NotWithoutMyTV:

LanguageCity: Should I be disappointed that I don't have a friend who's a not-altogether-convincing transgender girl who needs to prance around in her underwear and treat every vertical object like a stripper pole so that she can convince herself she's really a girl? Because if everyone has one of THOSE friends in their life, then... my life is really boring!

Baxter:

I'm totally with you LanguageCity. I know I have a friend that the night can go either way with. It is either a great time or she does one too many shots and we are babysitting.

I'm sorry but I love Ryan and Chet. If they weren't on the show it would be so boring. Plus there is something about Ryan I find HOT.

BlahBlah:

TWSS:
"She's a fraud and she can try to talk her way out of it and deceive herself into believing she's college-educated, but if I sat in a garage for a year, it still wouldn't make me a car."

LOL! How about if you sat in the garage for FOUR WHOLE YEARS??

CB, I'm surprised you likie Devyn and haven't called her out on her "doth protest too much" M.O.

"Noooo, I'm not jealous of Scott bringing those SKANKS(!) home!!!"

"I AM a collegiate-graduate!!!"

I'm glad she admitted that her beef with JD stems from the night he basically said the tranny was more fabu than her. Her ego is out of control. And Sarah is fooled by her (fake) show of confidence. Poor thing.

BlahBlah:

Vegas:

Or the ever-popular "soul-searching" excuse. Even though I graduated, I'm gonna use that one to explain anything I underachieved at. :)

If someone reads the table of contents of a magazine, does that make the person an authority on what's on every page? Devyn is that person who would memorize the table of contents and then argue with the magazine's editor about the feature articles.

Fancypants:

I was really hoping Ryan would have hired Tanisha from Bad Girls Club to wake them up banging pots and pans!!

imalush:

The only reason I watch this show is because of Ryan. He says the funniest things and I especially loved his huge blue cowboy hate this week.

Btw, Scott is in the new issue of Cosmo, I'm pretty sure it's the March issue. He's a model in one of the pictures and of course he's in his undies!

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