And then the really brilliant part happens, as Sarah, who went to JD to absolve herself from telling everyone else how to be, tells JD that the way he says things is hurtful, and JD gets mad and pretty much tells her she just proved her own point and then he throws a dishtowel. Sarah and Devyn shuffle away, over to the confessional where Sarah sits quietly and Devyn takes over with the real reason she's pissed at JD, and that's from the night at the drag bar when he said the drag queen had a better voice than Devyn. So, Devyn holds a grudge. And she never. Stops. Talking.
But you can't deny that she stands up for herself when someone's being mean to her. "Will you teach me how to be like that? Cause when Chet hurt my feelings I came in here and cried," Sarah tells Devyn with a plaintive stare. "Of course, baby," says Princess Devyn smoothly.
All it takes is some saline sacks and a manicure and boom you'll have confidence.
Next day, the boys are playing pool. The girls are playing cards. Chet's saying that Katelynn needs to just "let the cat out of the bag, cause it already is. We've petted it, we've accepted it as a housemate..." Ummm, what? This just sounds creepy. Ryan thought that she would have mentioned something by now. He wants to know and he wants to know soon, he tells us. "Maybe I need to be more aggressive," he warns.
And he does it in the most perfect way a guy like Ryan could. He walks in on her in the computer room, looking totally adorable by the way, and tells her, "You're like a big mystery and I'd love to learn more about you." Katelynn literally blushes and brushes her hair away. "I already know more than you think," he tells her, and then, "You were born a guy, weren't you?" And that was it! Like ripping off a band-aid. Oh, and Katelynn confirmed by the way.
And now it's time for Ryan and Katelynn's big emotional deal over the whole thing. How many roommates left to tell after this? Luckily, the Devyn reveal went pretty quickly, but that was cause she really already knew and wasn't freaked out. Not so much Ryan, so this convo might take a while.
But they immediately find commonality, as Katelynn tells Ryan that she didn't tell everyone at first because she didn't want to be defined as the transgender. What she wanted was to be defined as the hottie who pranced around in her panties, but well, that just wasn't realistic. And Ryan understands, that's why he kept his participation in the military private at first too. He didn't want to be the soldier boy. But he wants to know deets about Katelynn.
I wanna write a song about you. I've already come up with like six rhymes for wiener.
She tells him about the surgery, and Ryan yells "Owwww!" and "Ewwww!" alot. "Whoa!" he tells us. He asks her if it was a big decision. I know, no stupid questions, but please. She teaches him about hormones and how the whole thing cost her thirty grand. "You could have bought a bionic penis for that!" he tells her. Katelynn tells us he's typical of most heterosexual men, they just can't understand why she would want to cut if off.
"Orgasms are just as great now as they were back then," Katelynn tells Ryan. "Aaaaah! Aaaaaah! How!?!?" Ryan hyperventilates. Then tells her she's Pinnochio. She wants to be a real girl, but she's a boy. I think that's a little rude, but she seems to get it. "It's a lot for me to take in," he tells us honestly. "It was good," she tells him. She's happy about it, but annoying to know that she was so easily read. Awww. So can I say, I met Katelynn, and I had no idea. I just thought she had fantastic eyebrows.
Later on, Scotty's asking Ryan when they should confront Katelynn. Ryan tells him he already did it. And the he explains to Scotty, who's hurt that she thinks he wouldn't still want to be her friend. Then he asks Ryan if Katelynn kept her "stuff" in a pickle jar? I think it's less of a concern that he won't be her friend, and more of just saying things like that, you know?
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Comments (21)
This season is so boring, I keep forgetting the roommates' names.
The boys are much too condescending.
Katelynn is really starting to get on my nerves with her behavior. Also, that piece of hair perpetually in her face just pisses me off.
Not to be mean, but she spent all this money on her surgeries, couldn't she do something about her ears too? I can't imagine it would add much to her bottom line, and she was under anyway.
1 of 21 | Posted by spacevenus | Posted on February 16, 2009 10:51 AM
i'd like to know which gettysburg ryan is from. there might not be a strip club in gettysburg... but there is in the next town over. all you have to do is hop down the road about 15 minutes. i'm kind of embarassed to say this, but my hometown, hanover, is 20 minutes away from g-burg and ryan is really making us look bad. we're not all as narrow minded as him, i promise!
great recap as always chickbomb.. you always make the episodes seem more entertaining than they really are
2 of 21 | Posted by kmh5125 | Posted on February 16, 2009 11:29 AM
I'm not finished reading yet but this is already one of your funniest recaps ever, CB. You deserve a raise.
"Gettysburg must be a really tiny town if the midway point through the tour is also the starting point. And the finishing point."
This explains so much about why Ryan thinks he's an Alpha male -> small pond/big fish.
Katelyn is a hot mess. I really dislike her. No one wants to see your formerly dude bits, okay. It would be different if you were a hot transgender but you're not.
I somehow really like Chet. He's funny and confident in his own skin (or at least fakes it well).
This season is so boring that it's becoming entertaining - kinda like how something is so ugly it starts becoming cute (see Troll Doll).
3 of 21 | Posted by BlahBlah | Posted on February 16, 2009 11:35 AM
Also, Ryan was a total hypocrite for waking the roommates up noisily when he bitched at JD for waking him up with the shaving cream. What happened to sleep being sacrosanct? Whatta douche.
4 of 21 | Posted by BlahBlah | Posted on February 16, 2009 11:39 AM
that was hysterrical.. i kno this season is boring but the boys making fun of the girls actually had me laughing for a while.. especially "ill lead, yuk yuk yuk yuk" lol
also the title of this recap had me rollin since i was disturbed by this line when i saw the show
also.. i hate watching confessionals of scott bc..
HE NEVER BLINKS. why? he looks like he has no eyelids and his eyes are crazy glued all the way open
5 of 21 | Posted by angelbayyb | Posted on February 16, 2009 2:30 PM
Devyn needs to just shut her trap sometimes!! She just loves throwing the word "collegiate" around all the time. Damn, it's like the only word she learned in college.
6 of 21 | Posted by loves2play05 | Posted on February 16, 2009 3:59 PM
i'm actually finding this season of the real world entertaining. i don't mind any of the people too much. i think it's a nice group of people that make up the real world this season. i'm so over the "over-acting & reacting," as in all the fighting, bitching, & skanking of real worlds past.
7 of 21 | Posted by mrngstar | Posted on February 16, 2009 4:16 PM
Katelynn does not look like a woman. I'm sorry that disappoints her, but she's got to do a lot more to look feminine than walk around nearly naked. And, as a woman, I'm offended that she thinks femininity and sexuality can be garnered by working it out on a stripper pole. Since when were strippers held up to be the standard on femininity?
I laughed at your "She thought she'd be the hottie who pranced around in her panties" (I paraphrased). She was wrong; she's no Melinda and all the boys agreed as they covered their faces and complained loudly.
And last thing, Devyn was SO SHAMED when JD shut her down! In her FACE! That was priceless. She's a fraud and she can try to talk her way out of it and deceive herself into believing she's college-educated, but if I sat in a garage for a year, it still wouldn't make me a car.
8 of 21 | Posted by Thatswhatshesaid | Posted on February 16, 2009 5:31 PM
As much as it pains me, I also have to side with the boys when they take off the morning of the bike ride without the girls. Though I would have wanted to kill Ryan for waking me up by clanging a pot, I find it every bit as aggravating when I set a time with my girlfriends to go out, show up at that time completely ready, and then have to sit around for another good 30-45 minutes while they take their sweet time putting on the finishing touches (or in some cases, deciding AT THAT POINT to just start showering). So Katelynn, when you say "God forbid they have to wait for anyone," I say God forbid indeed, because that shit is annoying.
That being said, I am starting to get incredibly put off by Devyn's extreme insecurities covered up by extreme self-righteousness. First the Scott thing ("I'm not jealous, I'm ANNOYED") and now the college dropout business. She's obviously bothered by the fact that she didn't finish college, or she wouldn't drop the fact that she's studied something at a "collegiate level" so much. This episode was the SECOND TIME she has done it. Let me tell you, I'm in the middle of writing a thesis about the history of the circus in America and you can bet that when I'm done writing it, I'll also be done talking about it unless someone specifically asks. Let me also tell you something, Devyn. You're offended that JD put you in the same category as a college dropout? Well, I'm offended that you put yourself in the same category as me when I'm working my ass off and you left halfway through to pursue acting. Not that I would ever judge someone for going the acting route, but you're obviously hell-bent on people respecting that you've studied at the collegiate level. If you're so worried about the negative connotations that come along with the title (and yes, "not finishing college" is synonymous with "college dropout," and it's NOT that big of a deal unless you let it be....which you obviously do) maybe you should have just gotten the freaking degree. That way, when you wax poetic about your infinite knowledge, you might have a smidgen of credibility.
9 of 21 | Posted by andreak1013 | Posted on February 16, 2009 7:08 PM
I completely sided with the guys in this episode (and pretty much every other one). With the waking up with the lid and spoon thing, didn't they all agree to wake up and go to Gettysburg? So I have to believe that they decided on a time and Ryan didn't just pick one right before he went to bed, they had to have been anticipating it.
And Devyn, you are a college dropout...sorry. You didn't complete college, so you just are one.
And I completely laughed out loud at so many things this episode.
"There's 20 bucks out the window...literally."
"I'm not immature!" wearing a giant foam cowboy hat.
Chet's imitation of Katelynn, "the pole wasn't even greased properly."
"I'll lead, blahblahblah."
10 of 21 | Posted by kelsey | Posted on February 16, 2009 8:19 PM
andreak1013:
NO WAY!!!! I'm writing a thesis about little yappy show dogs and the people that own them! We should sooooo collaborate!!!!!
Katelynn should get a refund, and instead of cash, she should ask for Thai sex dollars. (They're like Disney Dollars, only... different.)
11 of 21 | Posted by NotWithoutMyTV | Posted on February 17, 2009 8:08 AM
Why the hell don't Devyn and Sarah just say they ran out of money or are taking a break to "find themselves" instead of flat-ou saying, "Yeah, I quite college, but I'm not a dropout." At least the people I know get creative with their excuses.
12 of 21 | Posted by vegasdarling | Posted on February 17, 2009 9:39 AM
Normally I would say JD was being a douche for telling Devyn she's a college dropout (it may be true, but it's rude most times), but after her nonsensical yelling at him she deserved it.
And yes, she IS a college dropout. Either you finish or you don't. No matter what the reason may be.
13 of 21 | Posted by Pixi-Stix | Posted on February 17, 2009 10:23 AM
I must agree, Devyn has no right to categorize herself with the rest of us who DID complete college and received our degrees. I worked my butt off for over 6 years, so for her to insinuate that, on a "collegiate level" we are one and the same, is incorrect.
I wouldnt want the stigma of "college dropout" attached to me either, but like a poster up there said... you can say you are taking time off, or money is running short, or something like that. Thats actually extremely common with the economy as shaky as it is, so no one would think less of her. More people would likely think less of her for actually believing her grandeur illusions that she isn't a college drop out.
14 of 21 | Posted by Kara | Posted on February 17, 2009 10:32 AM
Everyone has a Katelynn in their life... the friend who you hate going into public with cause you never know when they're going to be embarrassingly inappropriate. Urgh.
This comic made me think of her... sorry for the link, but it's highly appropriate: www.explosm.net/db/files/Comics/Rob/stripperfireman.png
Also I can't decide whether to hate Sarah or love her. She always comes off as trying too hard, but sometimes she's genuinely awesome. Also, I miss RW Hollywood's nicknames.
15 of 21 | Posted by LanguageCity | Posted on February 17, 2009 11:23 AM
LanguageCity: Should I be disappointed that I don't have a friend who's a not-altogether-convincing transgender girl who needs to prance around in her underwear and treat every vertical object like a stripper pole so that she can convince herself she's really a girl? Because if everyone has one of THOSE friends in their life, then... my life is really boring!
16 of 21 | Posted by NotWithoutMyTV | Posted on February 17, 2009 1:50 PM
I'm totally with you LanguageCity. I know I have a friend that the night can go either way with. It is either a great time or she does one too many shots and we are babysitting.
I'm sorry but I love Ryan and Chet. If they weren't on the show it would be so boring. Plus there is something about Ryan I find HOT.
17 of 21 | Posted by Baxter | Posted on February 17, 2009 2:34 PM
TWSS:
"She's a fraud and she can try to talk her way out of it and deceive herself into believing she's college-educated, but if I sat in a garage for a year, it still wouldn't make me a car."
LOL! How about if you sat in the garage for FOUR WHOLE YEARS??
CB, I'm surprised you likie Devyn and haven't called her out on her "doth protest too much" M.O.
"Noooo, I'm not jealous of Scott bringing those SKANKS(!) home!!!"
"I AM a collegiate-graduate!!!"
I'm glad she admitted that her beef with JD stems from the night he basically said the tranny was more fabu than her. Her ego is out of control. And Sarah is fooled by her (fake) show of confidence. Poor thing.
18 of 21 | Posted by BlahBlah | Posted on February 17, 2009 10:28 PM
Vegas:
Or the ever-popular "soul-searching" excuse. Even though I graduated, I'm gonna use that one to explain anything I underachieved at. :)
If someone reads the table of contents of a magazine, does that make the person an authority on what's on every page? Devyn is that person who would memorize the table of contents and then argue with the magazine's editor about the feature articles.
19 of 21 | Posted by BlahBlah | Posted on February 17, 2009 10:38 PM
I was really hoping Ryan would have hired Tanisha from Bad Girls Club to wake them up banging pots and pans!!
20 of 21 | Posted by Fancypants | Posted on February 19, 2009 6:36 AM
The only reason I watch this show is because of Ryan. He says the funniest things and I especially loved his huge blue cowboy hate this week.
Btw, Scott is in the new issue of Cosmo, I'm pretty sure it's the March issue. He's a model in one of the pictures and of course he's in his undies!
21 of 21 | Posted by imalush | Posted on February 24, 2009 6:58 PM