Real World Sydney: Pushy Bitches

Monday night in LA. Flipit and ChickBomb gorging on Brazilian food and red wine on Sunset. After dinner, we decide to take the party back to Flippy's new fabulous penthouse apartment for a little post dinner herbal refreshment and TV, cause that's how we roll. When we turn on the TV, I see Ashli and Dumby sitting on a counter top playing their little game, and I know immediately we are watching Wednesday's episode on Monday. And I'm sure that I'm hallucinating this, because what are the chances that MTV would randomly air this episode two days early on the night that Flippy and me just happen to be hanging out? But, it's real. It's the Real World Sydney, and it's Monday. Thanksgiving came early this year, dolls. Here we go!

Uhoh
Oooh shit.

We open with a beautiful day in Sydney - sunshine, surf, sand...and a muscleman jogging the beach in a banana hammock. Well, that part wasn't so beautiful. But back to the point - a beautiful day in Sydney. And what better way to soak up all this natural beauty than...on the phone! I have to wonder for the eighty-millionth time, why do they even need to be in Sydney? They never leave the damn house, except when Contiki makes them, and even then they only go to Subway. This could have been the Real World: Bumblefuck and no one would even know the difference.

Realworldhammock
So I take it the water's really cold in Australia.

Trash gets on the phone with Jarrod. Apparently, there's some big dramz with Blair and Kelly and Jen and they're sending him messages, and he's like, dude, and Trasha's like, I know, cause she told Katie, like - but we don't get to hear the end of this very important nugget passed on to Katie cause there's a phone ringing in the background. According to Trash, it's the same person who keeps calling and calling, and she's getting really annoyed.

Surprise, surprise, it's Parisa's mom that keeps who calling. I suspect the return of our friend the Sneaky PA who made Alex leave love notes for both girls. I bet he saw Trash on the phone, called the Parisas back in NY and told them to just keep trying to get through. Oh Sneaky PA, how I've missed you!

Trash, as pissily as possible, tells Parisa that someone keeps trying to call her. Parisa says she knows, it's her parents, and she hasn't spoken to them in three days. WELL. Trash isn't going to speak to Jarrod for three days, cause he's going to a wedding in Arizona. She says it with trademark Trasha nastiness, enunciating Ar-i-ZO-na.

And it's Arizona babe, not Mars. Last I heard, the Graham Bell revolution had made it there. And Jarrod agrees. "What do you mean, you're not going to speak to me for three days?" he asks, the hope evident in his voice. Well, you have a wedding, she tells him. But something tells me Jarrod would find the time get in touch. His girlfriend is Trasha. He's scared not to.

Trashpissed
I'd be totally in the right to rip Parisa's mom a new asshole.

But Trash, sensing an opportunity to turn it all around and make it all Marge's fault tells Jarrod, "Fine, I'll let you go cause Parisa needs to use the phone." Oh, her highness will allow Jarrod off the phone for the benefit of her best bud, Parisa. I so love where this is headed. Actually, I've seen the preview, so I already know exactly where this is going to end up, but I so love the path we're taking to get there. When it comes to the Real World, petty and banal totally work for me.

Parisa tells us that Trash is on the phone with Jarrod all the time. Well, like, duh, how else is she going to get the update on the Blair/Jen/Kelly/Katie sitch? Trasha informs Parisa that the phone is free. Parisa thanks her, but Trash isn't done. She complains that whoever it was that was calling did so about fifty thousand times, and apparently it was Parisa's Mom. Only she says "Parisa's Mom" in a super bitchy tone of voice.

Parisa tells Trash that she hasn't talked to her family in three days. WELL, again! Trash hasn't talked to her family in FIVE days, but that doesn't mean they "call up the heezy". First of all, white Jesus freak from Fresno? Cool it with the urban slang. And second, your family not wanting to talk to you for five days and vice versa isn't exactly a bragging point.

Dontfront
Don't front, Shawty.

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Comments (19)

IndyHillsAddict:

Oh ChickBomb, I have been waiting for your recap. Bravo!!! Job well done. I too was surprised to see RW on after The Hills. While Parisa has done some things I don't agree with, nothing comes close to how rude and aggressive Trasha has been. Would love to be a fly on the wall when her parents and boyfriend see her antics. Can't wait until next week to see Miss "As a Christian" have the door hit her on the way out!

Sweetleaf911:

I official re-christen him Dumby Bear as well.

texasgal75:

Hilarious recap! Of course, the episode was AWESOME!!! I played back the shoving scene about 3 times to try and hear what Trasha said before she knocked Parisa. It was something about "I can't talk to them because of their work and church and....."

What I find utterly ridiculous is that after that little diatribe about being Christian and that church stood in the way of her talking to her parents, she had the nerve to lay her hands on someone. She may need to get back to church and brush up a little.

For what it's worth, though, she didn't look like she hit Parisa hard enough to knock her down. I thought it was a well-maneuvered flop. Parisa should play for the NBA.

bentley1101:

What she says is my family is busy with work and church and can't talk, so don't say I pick Jarrod over them. Or something to that effect, according to my captioning. I beg to differ on the fact that she didn't push her hard enough. I think she did, but it probably wouldn't have been so bad except for the fact that Parisa fell into a doorway and then over something, it was more than just a push.

I was a little disappointed that they've shown us the push for weeks now, but we can all tell the fallout is what'll be good. Happy Thanksgiving.

blahblah:

Dammit, I need to start watching this show again instead of just reading the recaps!

From the recap:
"He's turning it around and making HER the cheater so he won't feel guilty about banging house whore later, Flippy notes. I'm starting to wonder if I should be watching with Flippy. He's more insightful than me."

Indeed. Flipit is invited to all upcoming Real World parties hosted at my house.

shia0bundan:

... the producers SUCK!

This episode and the next should have been combined to make one glorious episode. Basically the previews already showed this entire episode... there was so little point in watching. I can't believe they left the push at the end and NEXT week we get the "I pushed a fat girl" thing... What the hell? Lame, lame, lame!

DP Hooker:

Trasha is quite possibly the most disgusting piece of shit human being I have ever met and/or seen on a reality tv show. Her behavior, comments, rudeness, skunk hair, flaunting Christianity when it's convenient, distorted perception of reality, even her voice, just everything is such complete trashy shit.

Your screencap about "It rang twice! Who are you banging you slut?!?!" cracked me up. Dumby Bear is definitely on his way to the Spousal Abuse Hall of Fame.

HereKittyKitty:

I second the opinion that Flipit needs to start watching shows with you. I really enjoyed your recaps at the beginning of the season ChickBomb, and finally about a month ago they degenerated to a point where I just refused to comment because it was adding fuel to the fire. Glad to see funny ChickBomb is back in the swing of things.

I hope that Trash-heap gets sent home. I watched that clip a few more times and decided that she did hit Parisa pretty hard. I don't care how angry you are, you just don't lay your hands on other people. Maybe our Christian princess was attempting some faith healing? It wouldn't be the first idea she got screwed up in that warped little mind of hers.

Ashli is one of the whoriest whores I've ever seen on the Real World. She makes Trashelle seem like a nice southern debutante.

And until Issac sits down and tells us who is on the phone the most, I call bullshit on all of them. Cow will work in a pinch.

isharma:

You forgot to include Trisha pinching Parisa! lol

jesshloly:

pinching, is that what that weird interaction afterwards was?

joeydoll:

If I was Parisa I would've rip Trasha's skunk hair out of its tracks. Honestly Parisa needs to grow some cajones and start fighting back and stop being so needy, because she really has potential.

Chee-Z-TeeVee Addict:

HereKittyKitty,

WB! We missed you!

Errrica:

What was with Trisha yelling "i didn't hit you, bitch?" Uh, clearly.... you did.

And i wonder how Julie feels now watching this shit on tv? if i saw my boyfriend telling another girl that he would fuck her if he was single and cuddling in bed with some hobag you better believe i wouldnt keep him around.. regardless of whether he physically "cheated" or not!!

Dramaqn15:

These. People. Are. Awful.WOW.

I know I'm waaaayyy too old (28) to identify with the cast of this show, but is this truly what's going on with the late teen / early twenty set?! Sweet Jesus! I hope every single one of them gets sucked directly into hell without even dying first...and I say this "as a Christian..."

Ha! Great recap!

Dramaqn15:

These. People. Are. Awful. WOW.

I know I'm waaaayy too old (28) to identify with the cast members, but is this seriously what's going on with the late teen / early twenty set? I hope each one of them gets sucked directly into hell without even dying first. And I say this "as a Christian..."

Ha! Great recap!

bakismaki:

I found this episode really boring. The best thing was the dumby bear thing.

The much hyped Parisa/Trasha fight turned out to be a snoozer. Makes me think most of the other hyped stuff that's supposed to happen will turn out to be a snooze fest as well.

arainbow:

Parisa is a tattletale. She isnt nice to any of the roommates. No one likes her because she doesnt give s sh** about anyone else and just talks on the phone with her mommy. She is SO boring to watch. Singing or working out or trying to get on Dumby Bear. She is so annoying! I wish Marge would leave.

pinky1234:

I have been coming to TVgasm for the past couple of years and I’ve never felt the need to comment… until now. Chickbomb, you are WAY TOO EASY on the snobby sluts in the house (Trisha, Kelly Ann, and Ashli) and you are WAY TOO HARD on Parisa. The way you make fun of Parisa’s style, how you notice silly things like eyelashes, and how you barely make fun of the “pretty girls” makes me think it is because you are EXACTLY like Trisha, Kelly Ann, and Ashli: stuck-up, close-minded, and superficial.

MichyPR:

I agree, you could be way harder on those other bitches. I can't say that I blame Parisa for not giving a sh*t about any of them because it's not like they've been nice to her. I'm glad Trisha's going home cause she is the worst of them...well KA is really bad too. God I hate them, the only one I like is Isaac. All the others should "get sucked directly into hell without even dying first."- Dramaqn15

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