Welcome back to the Real World Brooklyn, where everyone dreams big, and the camera crews following them around make that seem like a good plan.
No! You don't look like a epileptic at all! Keep dancing!
The first thing we get today is Chet in a Thugs Not Drugs t-shirt grilling Katelynn about her gender reassignment surgery. What's with the shirt, moron? Thugs and drugs are kind of synonymous. He wants to know about the process of going from boy to girl. Where do you start? Katelynn explains that you have to live as woman for a year and take hormones for a year. And then she explains the dilation part of things.
First you take drugs, then you borrow money from thugs for your jugs get the hair removed from your ugly mug. Is that too long for a t-shirt?
"It's a medical stint," she explains, for "vaginal depth". I don't want to be ignorant, but I think that was more than I needed to know. Then she explains that even though she wanted to be a woman, she's not gay. Well, credit to Chet to at least talk to her about it. "You can always play ask the transsexual," Katelynn offers. "It's my new favorite game," says Thug Life.
Oh, and there's Devyn in a hot purple dress! She's in Manhattan to visit a company called Jovani, which manufactures pageant dresses. I love that name, Jovani, it sounds like a reject from Zoolander. Those pageant girls know how to work a connection. She gets inside and meets a fabulously whiney New Yawkuuuuuuh named Sheri Simon, who's a sales rep. But probably not a former pageant contestant.
Just a guess.
Turns out Dev's Godmother back in St. Louis owns a dress boutique, and she's been working with Jovani forever. And for this reason, and because she's got a camera crew trailing her, they ask her what job she wants to do. Dev namedrops "Aunt Sharon", and next thing you know, they're offering her a spokesperson job. Which leads to a montage of Devyn trying on a million dresses set to pop music. The dresses are totally pageant, but it still looks like fun to play dress up with them.
She meets with the president of Jovani who's not as seduced by the cameras and Aunt Sharon as Sheri Simon was. He wants to know what Dev's interests are and she tells him "acting, singing and designing". Wow, a reality star springboarding a singing/acting/designing career. Dev's totally thinking outside the box. Look honey, I like you, but your probably good at one of those things at best. You're no J Lo. Or J Mo, for that matter.
They want to know what her talent was in pageants. I like this interview. Mr. Jovani is going to make Dev work for her fake job. Dev's talent was singing. She sang 'I Hope You Dance'. Well, nice to know that sappy tune has an afterlife in the pageant world. "I love that sawwwwng!" squeals Sheri Simon, Dev's new number one fan.
Then Mr. Jovani wants to know where Dev sees herself in five years. Standard job interview stuff, the correct answer being, "Working for you, of course!" but Devyn starts spilling her very realistic goals of being a "movie star, having my own line, already out, and a restaurant. A dessert restaurant," she adds by way of explanation. Oh, a restauranteur too! I hate to sound a million years old here, but isn't it nice to be twenty and clueless? Even Mr. Jovani and Sheri Simon are kind of trying not to laugh.
A whole restaurant devoted to HoHos. Great idea!
Mr. Jovani tells her she's beautiful with a great personality and good energy, and in the end, Devyn is new new Jovani PR girl! Cool job. And she gets to try on dresses. They seal the deal with a creepy hug.
Back at the house, Katelynn's starting to regret offering Chet the opportunity to play Ask The Transexual. He tells us he can't help it, the thoughts are running through her mind. He can't stop thinking about Katelynn dilating in bed. Oh, weird. Not that she's doing that, but that he's thinking about it. He wants to know where she keeps the stints, so he can attach some dental floss and stick it in someone's mouth while they're sleeping. Katelynn is not interested or amused.
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Comments (11)
So I'm babysitting, and the young'n just asked me "Who's that girl in the purple shirt?" hahahahahahaha
1 of 11 | Posted by here4beer | Posted on March 10, 2009 4:08 PM
OK, while I think Devyn is gorgeous (in certain pictures), part of me hates her for having these connections and not having to work the way others do. She gets to interview with a Braodway-affiliated producer because of her cousin. Now, she gets the Jovani gig because of her Aunt. On the one hand, way to represent, but on the other, could she actually get a gig on her own? Admittedly, that would negate other MTV reality shows like the Hills, etc. But still . . . Lol to Chet for calling her out. But, double-lol to her for calling out Chet’s goofiness. While I doubt Devyn will hold onto the job for long, I’ll cross my fingers.
2 of 11 | Posted by anicho01 | Posted on March 10, 2009 9:01 PM
I have to say this: I find Chet to be the ugliest looking guy I've seen.
3 of 11 | Posted by realitytvwhore | Posted on March 10, 2009 9:42 PM
as a REAL p.r. professional, let me sum up devyn in one word: UGH!
4 of 11 | Posted by baymenxpac | Posted on March 11, 2009 9:23 AM
"A whole restaurant devoted to HoHos. Great idea!"
I loved this screenshot, but actually it's a freaking brilliant idea. I could totally see myself dumping 90% of my disposable income in a place like that
5 of 11 | Posted by waffleboy09 | Posted on March 11, 2009 11:45 AM
"A girl who looks like a boy tells Katelynn they want to do a presentation."
I think the recapper meant "ANOTHER girl who looks like a boy."
Real World nauseates me because you have to wonder how many naive teens watching it think that their dream is going to fall into their lap (or it will come find them as they're getting stupid drunk at the local bar.) You watch some clueless wonder chirp "I want to be an actress, or a singer, or maybe a clothing designer, or there was that time when I wanted to be a news anchor!" and the next day, MTV has set them up with a fake job. They never do a thing to earn any of these opportunities. Phew. Now that I've got that off my chest, I gotta go chase some kids off my lawn...
6 of 11 | Posted by NotWithoutMyTV | Posted on March 11, 2009 1:23 PM
my bf and i were eating dinner when kaitlynn started to talk about her "man-made-hole" and how she needs to dialate. my bf got so grossed out and made me change it. it ruined his din-din.
7 of 11 | Posted by loves2play05 | Posted on March 11, 2009 2:09 PM
I'm guessing Devyn's never heard of Cheesecake Factory? LOL.
8 of 11 | Posted by slutty_whore | Posted on March 11, 2009 3:51 PM
Well anicho01 sometimes it really is "Not what you know but who you know." Most people struggle to just get a break, but not everyone.
I dislike Chet and I am glad he is stuck with a name like Chester. The only funny thing about him is to see how much he is in love with Ryan but would never admit it to himself.
9 of 11 | Posted by dreamkeeper | Posted on March 11, 2009 3:56 PM
I can't believe nobody's said anything about Chet's mother's voice...so I will: nails on a chalkboard.
10 of 11 | Posted by heygirl | Posted on March 11, 2009 5:09 PM
I heard on the Innerweb that Kaitlynn has made an exclusive deal with Costco to distribute her book, entitled "It's Not A Dildo, It's a Medical Device!"
There's talk of a follow-up book, possibly titled "Crysalis: How Pretty Boys Become Ugly Girls".
11 of 11 | Posted by NotWithoutMyTV | Posted on March 12, 2009 7:07 AM