Testimonials

But they do share that there was a phone throwing incident! Finally, someone admits that someone got mad here! What else are they hiding? He and Scotty giggle about it, but they won't tell me anything more. Oh, have I mentioned I am assigned an escort on the house tour? It's not Arch-Nemesis Jess, it's another PR girl. The MTV PR girls know a troublemaker when they see one. Perhaps they should have been in charge of casting.

Then we tour the bathroom, which didn't get any more interesting the second time around. I pointed out the lack of full length mirrors, and they told me they had mirrors in their rooms. The showers are, as usual, totally see through except for a strategic strip of frosted glass. The boys strike a pose, and we're moving on.

Hard-hitting photojournalism.

We hit the computer room, where I'm informed that this season of the politically correct Real World is "green". That means that the computer is powered by a bicycle. That's right, to get online, you have to pedal. Personally, I'd have bid a fond farewell to the internet for the duration. J.D. tells me they actually figured out a way to rig it so they didn't have to pedal but then got in trouble and had to go back to the pedaling thing. There's a living room-ish area, and there's an X-Box area where they have Rock Band set up. And that's kind of the whole living quarters. I can't believe there were eight of them in there, it's really pretty small.

We head outside and downstairs to the (drumroll, please) hot tub! It's covered, and the memory card on my camera chooses this moment to decide it's full, so I don't get a shot of it because the PR girl is hustling us along and I have to delete some pictures to make room for new ones. I'm deleting and walking, and then we walk up to a pickup truck on the pier. J.D. tells me that because they couldn't turn the lights out until everyone is asleep and he's an early to bed person, he used to come sleep in the pickup truck. "Like Jewel," he tells me. I doubt he came up with that one on the spot, but still, good one.

Who will save your soul?

Our last and final stop is the gym...sponsored by Crunch! Crunch is a fabulous gym. I would love a membership at that wonderful gym, Crunch. They have great classes at Crunch, and I had the best personal trainer in the world when I used to work out there. At Crunch. See where I'm going with this? Crunch? Anyway, they've provided a great gym for the roomies, complete with stripper pole! Which I'm told didn't get too much use. I ask the boys to pose on it for me, but they don't want to. Crunch.

Am I making myself clear?

We head back into the house, and then it's time to meet Chet and Ryan. These two are my favorites by far because the first four, while lovely to talk to, seemed a little sanitized. Chet greets me with a devilish smile, and compliments my watch. Then he one-ups me with what might possibly be a real Rolex. Does he really want to get into a battle of expensive accessories with me? Cause he will lose. But then I decide I appreciate the charming/obnoxious thing he's got going.

Chet's attired in tight jeans with narrow ankles, a purple t-shirt and a vest - "Oh, you're emo!" I tell him. He laughs and agrees, scoring another point with me by not being offended. Another one who's not my type physically, but adorable nonetheless. Chet continues to endear himself to me by admitting that he indeed has joined the Real World for exposure. He hopes to host a talk show one day. He's even already got it titled - Chet Chat. He tells me he's better at interviewing than being interviewed. Then he mulls it over for a moment, and tells me on second thought, he's good at both.

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