Testimonials

"What would you say you aren't good at?" I ask him through my giggles. I am thoroughly enjoying my time with Chet. "Well, maybe sex, but that's only because I haven't done it yet," he tells me. Oh, that's right. We've got another virgin on our hands. And a Mormon, too. Then he makes a joke about me and him getting it on right there, cause we're doing the interview on his bed. I am a bastion of professionalism. So I ask him if he thinks being on the Real World helped him score girls, and he says yes. Then Chet enlightens me on his philosophy toward women, which is that you always have to "dangle the carrot", and make them think you're willing to give more than you are. Which in Chet's case, would be sex.

At some point during our exchange, I tell Chet he's the Chuck Bass of the Real World house, which he is also smart enough to realize is the biggest compliment I could give. Chet will be the star of the Real World Brooklyn. Remember I said that.

And because every breakout star needs a sidekick, we come to Ryan, who is adorable with curly brown hair and very nice eyes - totally my type. He's laid back and quiet. Chet pretty much speaks for both of them, peppering everything he says to me with a "we". Chet tells me it was important to have a "strong ally" in the house. Ryan sits there and smiles adorably. Cute and keeps his mouth shut. Very, very much my type. "It's a bro-mance," Chet explains to me. I beg him not to use that stupid word, but I think we're stuck with it in the cultural vernacular now, and there's nothing I can do about it.

Fine. I give up. It's a damn bro-mance.

I ask Ryan why he chose to join the Real World cast, and he replies, "Why not?" Okay, works for me. Ryan is an Iraqi war vet, and if he hadn't already endeared himself to me yet, this would have done it. He tells me that he's hoping to bring some attention to the returning veterans, and I like this. Nobody takes care of these poor soldiers coming home with missing limbs. Oh, and Ryan has a girlfriend. I ask him how that went, cause hello, Real World house, but surprise, surprise, humble soldier Ryan was faithful.

And if Ryan's not cute enough already, he throws in that he plays guitar too. I request an impromptu concert, but suddenly he's shy. I ask what kind of music he plays, and am advised of a song he wrote about tampons. I know, huh? Whatever, I'm curious, so I ask to hear that one, but they just laugh at their inside joke and deny me. Then they continue with the party line of everyone in the house being best friends and getting along. They were all very "goal-oriented", they tell me. That's great, but really, the only goal a Real Worlder should have is to get wasted and cause as much drama as possible. The best I got out of these two is that they played a lot of pranks.

And then comes Arch-Nemesis Jess to herd me away again. This time I'm bummed, I could have hung out with these boys all day. But it's time to move on to the next set of besties, and that's Sarah and Baya.

Sarah and Baya are both very nice girls, and very cool, but in a very conscious and studied way, which I find a bit counterintuitive. Sarah's got a bunch of tattoos all over her arms, and Baya's a hippie chick. Sarah's another one who came from an abusive background, and now she works with art therapy, teaching people to be survivors and not victims.

Sarah's lived her life pretty much bisexual, but is now in a serious relationship with a guy who her Mom set her up with. They've been together a year, and are going to get married. Um, and that's kind of it. Tattooed arms don't make you all that interesting. I quickly run out of things to talk about with Sarah, and move on to Baya.

« Celebrity Rehab: Bring the Pain | Main | Heroes: Saw for Wussies »

Posted in Real World by ChickBomb at 6:49 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)
Last Comment: DP Hooker on Dec 15, 2008 07:00 AM.