And here we are, in sunny Mexico! "It's like, tropical!" muses Jonna. As she and Derek are cruising through the airport, we meet Emilee, twenty-one, from Boston. She's never lived out of the country before. Let the jet setting begin! She lands in some cantina, and is soon joined by CJ who greets her with a huge hug...and she thinks they're Facebook friends.
And they are. "You know Josh?"'s and "Crazy cool guy!"'s abound. This is why I am avoiding Facebook at all costs. This much exposure can't be good for anyone. She's a stranger, but not a stranger, and either way CJ feels really comfortable. And Emilee's already making googly eyes. That didn't take long.
You know when you posted that update about hating waiting in line? I totally feel the same way. Let's make babies.
Next to alight from the airport is Ayiiia, and Bronne, pronounced Brawny, cause that also totally makes sense. Actually, what does make sense it that these roomies were born in the eighties when cocaine was hot. People were just getting high and naming babies all over the place. It was a crazy time.
Ay ay ay, mija. Mind that gap.
So, Brawny ("Like the paper towel!" he tells us proudly) comes out of the terminal swinging, starts telling a cameraman, "Let's do this!" and then notices Ayiiia standing there. Oh, hello. Brawny's from Pennsylvania, and he gets in trouble "more than anyone else in the world". Brawny immediately determines that Ayiiia's a Spanish speaker, and vows that even if he hates her, he's still gonna be friends with her for her language skills. I like it cause that's exactly how I'd be looking at it.
Back at the cantina there's CJ and Emilee marveling at the wonders of Facebook, and in comes Jonna and Derek! At the sight of Jonna, Emilee immediately starts smoothing her hair nervously, and tells us in interview how "stunning" Jonna is. And so, she's getting a nickname and that name will be Insecuritee. Jonna's going to be Rihanna, cause she's her low budge twin.
Rihanna sale!
They all chat around the table, and determine that besides Rihanna, they're all single. Rihanna has a "promise piercing" to prove her love to Boyfriend. I never got that whole "promise" thing. What are you promising? Is it a promise to make a promise? Wouldn't it make more sense to just make the actual promise? Deep and insightful questions, I know, only compounded by the fact that this is a piercing.
That kinda looks like she's being crucified. Next time, just get a ring.
Next into the cantina are Brawny and Ayiiia. They sit down, and the first thing Ayiiia wants to know is who's gay. Oh, I'm sorry was that information not included on Facebook? Well, Derek from the Mexican blanket bar is. Brawny is delighted. "Thank God we have a gay guy! Yes!" he tells us joyously, hastily adding, "I'm gonna get him to help me with my outfits." Help you with your outfits, help you bend over, either way. He's happy, I'm happy. I actually like Brawny so far, he reminds me of someone I know, and he seems kind of sweet. The guy he reminds me of was a closet case, by the way. Just FYI.
Girl, please!
Which brings us to the fact that Derek just graduated college, which brings us to the fact that both Insecuritee and Ayiiia are Hooters girls. Two? This is going to be the best Real World ever! And while the career minded role models high five over orange spandex shorts, in comes our next contestant, and that's Jasmine. My first thought when I see her is that she's the bitch. I am not fooled by her sunny yellow dress, and am further convinced when she sits down and informs the table that even though she's five feet tall and eighty pounds, you don't mess with her. Is that a challenge? Cause I accept. I generally don't care for really short people. Although she does admit to the whole Napoleon complex, and I respect that cause although I'm not short, I'm definitely a dictator.
She lasted a whole four seconds before waving her finger.
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Comments (14)
Fastest recap evah??
Thank you for getting me up to date, haven't watched the show yet......
Wow, a Mexico resort town and these fools?
Hilariosity is bound to ensue... ( at least in these recaps I am sure!)
Loved it!
1 of 14 | Posted by Sweetleaf | Posted on June 25, 2009 8:26 AM
You generally don't like short people?
2 of 14 | Posted by fineprint | Posted on June 25, 2009 8:30 AM
I'm sure CJ has completly blown his chance now of getting into the NFL. Because what every NFL team wants is a player who spends his off season being filmed by MTV getting trashed and hooking up with girls instead of conditioning and training.
3 of 14 | Posted by blazergirl | Posted on June 25, 2009 11:49 AM
"Although she does admit to the whole Napoleon complex, and I respect that cause although I'm not short, I'm definitely a dictator. "
: ) so funny
4 of 14 | Posted by irina0717 | Posted on June 25, 2009 3:09 PM
Yeah...explain why you don't like short people. Do you know what we (short people) have to go through to post a comment? I have to jump from key to key just to spell ONE word.
Moving on. I don't like that way young American tourists treat Mexico. I mean no one would go out and puke in public were they in Paris (France, that is). Of couse they puke if they were in Paris Hitlon. Usually the country is treated like a trash can.
I live in a border town and when I used to go down to the clubs down there, man those kids didn't give a f...care.
Besides, isn't anyone scared of all the kidnappings/killings down there? Some bad peeps are bound to think that MTV would pay a pretty penny for a liquored up/drugged up "bro" from the USA.
5 of 14 | Posted by uglycutie | Posted on June 25, 2009 5:13 PM
aaaaand does anyone elsed think they moved the show down there because legal drinking age is 18? This way the cast can be younger and dumber and we would avoid any pesky maturity or common sense.
6 of 14 | Posted by uglycutie | Posted on June 25, 2009 5:16 PM
actually im pretty sure everyone in the cast is 21+ or the majority anyways... and i work for a company that deals with the legal aspects of reality filming.. and even tho the drinking age their is 18... mtv can promote 18 year olds drinking so it actually wouldnt benefit filming in any other way...
anyways...
a ring piercing? yeah... right up there with tatooing someone's name on you...
7 of 14 | Posted by jthomps | Posted on June 25, 2009 9:24 PM
did anyone else watch the show endurance? probably not. well its basically survivor for teenagers. jonna was on the first season. i think she won the whole thing. i hated her then and i hate her now. she was that girl who would win and then would cry about having to send people to fight for their lives on the show. i always hate those people. but yeah cj is BANGIN
8 of 14 | Posted by preppyboy | Posted on June 25, 2009 10:18 PM
Bronne reminds me of Isaac a little bit. Btw, I think Isaac is the funniest real world cast member ever, his whole speech from the Duel 2, about "I think Rachel is a real Lesbian, not those, my dad didn't pay any attention to me, so I kiss random girls in club Lesbian." still gets a chuckle out of me.
9 of 14 | Posted by nflow | Posted on June 26, 2009 12:10 AM
Joey is a hoot. Even though he is probably a total ass, it seems funny to me. Also, did anyone notice the line in Rihanna's boyfriend's little list of things that he loved about her that said "you cleaning me"? Huh?
10 of 14 | Posted by texasgal75 | Posted on June 26, 2009 1:53 AM
Chickboooooomb! Welcome back, and I think this seasons has MUCH more promise to damage the image of young people in our country today than those snoozers in Brooklyn and their silly pranks and paeans to tampons. I'm so glad you're here to help us through it. Glad to have you back again!
love, J-Mo :)
11 of 14 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on June 26, 2009 10:50 AM
I have decided that Joey is my favorite. And he's kinda hot in a skeevy way. Like you said, his excitement to get some "ass" didn't even bother me. I actually thought it was cute! I hope he hooks up with Jonna and wins his bet.
CJ is hot too, but he reminds me of a hotter version of the goober hillbilly from Australia. What was his name, Coda, or something? Anyhoo, my money's on him to sleep with a roommate first. Probably Emilee.
12 of 14 | Posted by jadestarla | Posted on June 26, 2009 5:44 PM
It seems to me that they took the Brooklyn casting template (token black girl, meathead jock, puerto rican gay man, etc.) and applied it to a locale that would be more amenable to drama. Not that I'm complaining... YET!
13 of 14 | Posted by slutty_whore | Posted on June 30, 2009 5:44 AM
Excellent recap as always! Against my better judgment, I have started watching AGAIN, even though I swore I wouldn't. I'm almost as old as CJ, and since he's too old to be on the show, I'm probably way too old to be watching it. Allllllso.....I do not find Joey endearing; I think he is trying too hard and I find him to be a douche. But that's most likely because cocky, skinny-jeans-clad musicians are not my thang.
And why do people with the theory that they're ohhhhhhh-soooooo-in-loooooove with their significant other back home, but they can have "cuddle buddies" of the opposite sex while away because it's completely "innocent" keep showing up on these shows? Good god, it is NOT innocent. Does MTV seek these people out?!........Oh, wait. Did I really just ask that? Of course they do.
14 of 14 | Posted by andreak1013 | Posted on July 1, 2009 6:57 PM