This week on the Real World: Sydney, it's time for the Contiki smack-down! That's right, two teams in dueling tacky motorcoaches will compete for the title of Best Way To View A Foreign Country Through Someone Else's Eyes! The colorful scribbly bus is about as adventurous as this gig gets, but they do get to see the sights of Sydney. Isaac, Parisa and Ashli versus Dumby and The Spooners, otherwise known as KA and Cow. Who will prevail? Let's hop on the tour and find out!
Have you ever felt like pushing over a person on crutches? You might after this episode.
It's morning time in Sydney, and Isaac is leading Parisa and Ashli in a ditty about how "today, we're going to Darling Harbour!" Parisa tells us that Contiki likes to make up a "day song", so Isaac the rapper and Parisa the singer/songwriter decide to, well, make up a song. Parisa kind of sits like a wet blanket in the corner at first, while Ashli hams up the rap in a hat, and it's really damn catchy! Ashli keeps self consciously glancing at the camera though. Ashli still doesn't get reality TV. I'm running out of ways to say it, sweetie. for the hundredth time, everything gets filmed, but you pretend there's no cameras.
Yes, we can see you too.
The song goes "when the bus stops, let's get pumped, get pumped!" It's less of a song than a cheer, but you know what? It's fun! Very catchy. Meanwhile, Cow hops around the house with his work threatening ankle injury. It looks like a joke. He calls Sara at Contiki to give her the bad news about how he can't walk. "I've either broken or sprained my ankle," he casually whines to her. Sara isn't having it. Well, better get to a doctor, she tells him. No nonsense Sara. I love this girl.
But guess what? Country doesn't want to go to the doctor. Country ain't been to the doctor in ten years. Isn't this ankle injury soooo coincidental? Happens just before they are required to leave the house? I'm telling you, Cow's scared of Australia, and he's even scarder of Europe. But, it has been three days, and it's just getting worse, or so he says, so he finally agrees to seek medical attention. And also, the only thing that scares Cow more than Australia and Europe is one of them hen house women with a brain, and Sara's lurking dangerously close finding out the ankle thing is a sham.
Sure enough, when Dumby and KA get to the Contiki offices later that day, Sara's first comment is, "Cowhutta didn't make it? What a challenge for the team." She's so onto him. Then she goes into the last minute instructions for the next day's tours. I'm sure this was a verrrrry long speech, but the editing zeroes in on making sure they get lots of video footage, behaving professionally, and don't drink. Wonder what the big problems will be on the tour? Well, behaving professionally and not drinking, those were gimmes, but I have deduced that we will now be looking forward to some video footage mishaps as well. I'm intrigued.
Can I also point out that Marge looks totally hot in this meeting? She's got her hair all rocked out, she's wearing make up and some cut off Contiki shirt with major cleavage. Meow, Marge. I think we have Isaac to thank for loosening her up.
You look gorgeous. Now make me a sandwich, and hold the tomato, bitch!
Next day is tour day! Cow stands around in his hat, chastening Dumby and KA to get moving, while lamenting his severely injured ankle. But he's feeling so bad about it, he tells us, he's going to try and get to the doctor, get some crutches and do his best to meet up with the tour later. Wow, what a team player! Three days of doing NOTHING, and he finally finds a moment to squeeze in a trip to the doctor, with a faint hope of meeting up, you know, whenever. Look Country, maybe it don't take much to convince the mounties you got a fake busted ankle, but this is the big city, boy! Sitting on your ass interspersed with the occasional hobble ain't gonna cut it, Cow. Produce an x-ray or get to work.
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Comments (5)
How about Ho-fessional ? Fits better !
1 of 5 | Posted by doriangz | Posted on January 1, 2008 8:47 PM
It was pretty obvious that team Jammin Sidney was gonna win, Team Dumby sucked ass and people looked bored to death.
"There he is, hobbling along the harbor on his crutches, with his super-cool reflector shades, making us think that he's gonna bust into the tour with a big ol' "Yee Haw!" and all of the sudden it will be fun...NOPE"
Favoritest screencap ever lol Oh and the Subway thing. Great recap CB.
Also, I ♥ Isaac.
2 of 5 | Posted by MichyPR | Posted on January 2, 2008 1:29 AM
Great recap, ChickBomb!
3 of 5 | Posted by BonaFide | Posted on January 2, 2008 3:50 AM
I still can't believe that both KA and Dumby put gum in their mouths 30 seconds before they were gonna lead a tour! That's just what I look for in a tour manager -someone chewing like a cow while their spouting out facts. Also, Cow was taking Dumby's side in the whole restaurant debacle. I would've been just as pissed as KA was. They were treating her like sh*t!
4 of 5 | Posted by yankeesfan | Posted on January 2, 2008 8:34 AM
Loved the recap!
KA's one brian (not a typo) cell IS lonely!
Dunbar..mmmphh, skip it, chickbomb covered it.
I wondered about the spanish bar choice as well, but at least they found somewhere fun to take the tour- great job! I want o be on Issacs team toooooo. The lavendar sleeveless hoodie? yeesh.
Alex is slimey. What's up with the whole" Issac has two kids - no he doesn't now you pushed his button - drama? Hope it's just a small deal blown up to look like a big deal.
I totally agree with chickbomb, the producers are def "stirring the pot", I saw it on an episode of Law and Order or one of those crime shows. The producers told a cast member what another cast member had said about him and suggested he go on the roof and attack him! The kid got pushed off the roof and died, and the executive producer got 4 years. True story.(not really)
5 of 5 | Posted by Sweetleaf | Posted on January 3, 2008 2:21 PM