She manages to get it together to get two stupid questions in, and then we're back to dead air. "My mind goes blank. All I can think about is what? Ah...the...what?" Poor Blondie. But I will say she's cute when she's fucking up. Then she tells Shanna, "Well, I think that was it," causing the people in the production booth to completely lose it. "You never leave time on the table!" one of them yells belligerently. Oh no! Leaving time on the table? Summon the entertainment reporting police!
So, how do you feel about dirty whores?
Blondie tells us she thinks she thinks she's falling flat on her face as far as entertainment reporting goes. And then it's time for Kevin Frazier's official report card. He thinks Goody has a real opportunity in life to do well in the television business. She just needs to pay her dues, and she'll be good. Oh, Kevin Frazier. Do you know who you're talking to here? This is Goody. She's not a dues payer. You should be honored just to have her on set.
Next for review is Slick, who Kevin Frazier says learned a valuable lesson today - "The Fine Woman Lesson". There are a lot of fine women in Hollywood, but you're here to do a job, and she's here to do a job. Please, plugging your cable reality show on another cable reality show is a job? Where do I sign up for that? But Slick takes it well, saying, "You're gonna have your flaws, everyone's gotta start somewhere and build their way up." I like Slick. I do.
And then it's time for Blondie. Here's the first thing, Kevin Frazier tells her - you never, never, ever, ever, ever (truly, I lost count of how many never evers there were in there) "leave time on the table". Blondie tells us this is her dream job, but after what just happened, she doesn't want to do this again. Well, if that's her attitude about what was obviously a learning experience, then she shouldn't try again. "I just want to go back to South Carolina, and open a store," she declares. Open a store? First of all, what kind of store? Bait and tackle? I dunno, that's just what I picture in South Carolina. But knowing Blondie and her fake Miu Miu purse, I'm guessing it's clothing. And second of all, what the hell makes her think that she'll be any good at running a store? Is it the same reason that she thought she'd be a fabulous entertainment reporter? That reason being, she just thought it sounds like a fun thing to do? Blondie's like a small child. Hey, why not just give it all up to become an astronaut? That's about as likely.
But, all meanness aside, she is just a girl in her early twenties, finding herself and trying to figure out what she's good at and what's going to make her happy. I can't hate on that. Well, not too much anyway. You know I'm a sucker for the journey. She tells us the experience was "horrible, horrifying and humiliating". Well, she got catchy with the h's. That's something.
Just wait until you watch the season.
Back at the house, Horsey and Stripper are discussing the important details of departure from the Real World house, namely, how many suitcases they have. Horsey says they're all sad about leaving, but "I'll smile...cause it's not over." Deep thoughts from the alternate. You just know this dummy rehearsed that lame line.
But back to the important stuff, like one of the ORIGINAL roomies - that's right, dolls, Meathead's back for the big improv show! He hops in the car with Rick James and Slick. Rick James drives, while he and Meat ruminate on how happy they are to see each other, while Slick pouts in the coveted current-roomie passenger seat. Back at the house, Blondie is putting some makeup on Dolt's black eye. He says it sucks about his black eye, but this is his chance for everybody out there to maybe give him an opportunity. This is one of those moments where I'm not hating Dolt. Here's another one:
Goody: I have some blush you can use. Maybe some eyeliner?
Dolt: Do you want a black eye?
Good one, D! And I, for one, would love to see Goody with a black eye. I don't care who gives it to her.
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Comments (7)
Ugh Sarah is SO judgemental, I mean who does she think she is?? She was the most boring Real Worlder, why did they cast her??
And Im from Chicago and yes it does get that wet. It snowed soo much this winter and its rained a lot this summer. And that wasent rain that was horrible wet snow!
I love your recaps!
1 of 7 | Posted by lulu5087 | Posted on July 16, 2008 10:58 PM
Hey ChickBomb, lovely recap, you are the perfect mix of heart and rapier-sharp wits, I think you nailed it to the wall.
I did catch the reunion special, and I cannot wait to hear your thoughts on it, especially some of the assholish antics of Dave Dolt, and the special event that happened to Rick James (I don't want to spoil it for those who didn't catch it already). I will say, like you, pretty much any good will I had built up towards most of them was quickly and efficiently erased by what I saw in their reunion special. This show is so sad now. But you made me happy about it again!
love,
xoxo
J-Mo :)
2 of 7 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on July 16, 2008 11:58 PM
"Well, then we get a little more improv action. This never gets interesting."
I could not agree more with this comment! The scenes at the IO are the part of the show when I decide to do laundry instead of watching. I'd much rather see our Real Worlders trapse through the woods in their underwear than "take a class." Who's idea was that anyway? So glad this is over. This show has gone way downhill since Julie and Kevin's fight about racism on the street in front of their loft on Real World New York.
The roommates are way too aware of the cameras now and its the show has gone from a social experiment to signing up to live in a fishbowl for your 15 minutes of fame.
That said, ChickBomb- you rock. Totes happy you're recapping the train wreck that will be I Love Money!
3 of 7 | Posted by OhioAnnie | Posted on July 17, 2008 8:36 AM
ChickBomb, or should I call you Kim? You did a kick ass job with this season, which was one of the best in a while. I liked shortened season w/ hour episodes and hope they keep that up. That comment Dave made about his only regret being hooking up with Kim, I was hoping that was just tongue in cheek, or maybe bad editing to make him look like a jerk. You never know, the next sentence he said could have been that he regretted it because it interfered with their friendship or something. Anyway, I can't wait for your reunion show recap.
4 of 7 | Posted by JasonR | Posted on July 18, 2008 7:08 AM
Chickbomb, love your recaps but not every South Carolinian is small minded and racist! Just thought I would throw that out there!
5 of 7 | Posted by RLR123 | Posted on July 18, 2008 8:03 AM
I don't know why no one has pointed out the obvious- that Sara very well might be racist. Now, I'm not saying that's the case for sure, but it's interesting how she seems to have irrational anger always directed towards the black people in the house(Bri, Nick,Greg)- I believe she led the charge against Greg since the very first episode, talking shit about him so that by the time he entered the house, the guy never had a chance. She jumped all over Bri for sleeping with a guy in their room, but never said a peep when it was Kim and Dave doing the exact same thing, night after night. And she even started this big beef with Nick(clearly the nicest guy in the house) who had done nothing to her(from what I could tell) for no reason whatsoever. When it comes to the white roommates however, Sarah clicked with Kim from day one, never had an issue with Dave at all(even though he was banging away at Kim only feet from where her majesty slept), and was all understanding and sweet to Joey after he personally terrorized her and the other roommates. I think Will was the only exception because he was her little bitch boy, never stepping on her toes, and jumping all over Greg to protect her majesty, as well as letting her know how beautiful and desired she was(barf!). I'm sure Sarah would be horrified at having this accusation directed towards her, but I've seen her type before, and there definitely seems to be a pattern with who receives the brunt of her judgementalism and bitchiness.
6 of 7 | Posted by jazz hands | Posted on July 18, 2008 8:36 PM
Interesting, jazz hands. that definitely makes sense.
Why was Joey still wearing his hard hat in his girlfriend's car? I know it was a piece of shit but it did have a roof right?
7 of 7 | Posted by DP Hooker | Posted on July 19, 2008 1:01 PM