The next morn, Meat is out early. He kisses everyone goodbye in their beds. And it's time for one final soliloquy. "You never know what life's going to throw at you. But I hope that we're going to stay in touch. Even though I say I and think that maybe I shouldn't have went home, I'm not going to regret on anything. This was absolutely an experience that I'll never forget. Even though I went through a lot of hard times, and some bumps in the roads, I couldn't ask for anything different." Okay, that pretty much lacked in comparison to his past monologues, but oh well, I already typed it, so there it is. And "bumps in the roads", that was pretty good. Fare the well, Meat. Again.
And then it's time for everyone else to go home. Lots of suitcases. Boxes being taped. Goody tells us that it's such a unique experience, that whether they stay in touch or never speak again, they'll always share that. They all head outside with their luggage, and then the first taxi cab shows up to shuttle the first roomie off. It's for Horsey Brittini, and it's a pretty anti-climatic goodbye. I never felt like this alternate really fit in or contributed much. They show her doing headshots, and yup, still horsey. Profile, girl, how are you going to be a high fashion model if you don't even know your good angles?
The next cab shows up, and of course it's for alternate #2, Slick Nick. The other two amigos, Rick James and Dolt cling to him. It's kind of cute. Slick tells us that it's a great feeling to know that he's leaving here with two brothers. Notice, not a word about the ladies. The three boys give a big group hug, and Rick tells us that he can call Slick a good friend. Slick's headshot looks fabulous. This guy might very possibly be going somewhere.
And then we're left with the original five. The next ride is for Dave Dolt who tells us he'll miss hanging out with everyone more than anything. But he'll also miss the basketball court. And the hot tub. And the sauna. Well, thanks for reminding us, Dolt. I had almost cleansed the memory of all the skanky shit that went down in there. He gives his hugs goodbye, and there's a moment where he's hugging Blondie, and it's heartfelt, but there's Goody, smirking in the background. His last words to us are, "My only regret...is hooking up with Kim." So my last words to him will be goodbye, asshole. I mean, really. How unnecessary. He looks smug as hell in his headshot. I know he's got little man's disease, but perhaps he needs another beat down at Area to show him how it is in Hollywood. Oh wait, he's already hightailed back east to Philadelphia (where I was this morning, and oh my, I have never seen so many fat asses in cheap clothes in my...well, this week. I saw peach, printed overalls. Enough said) so maybe he already knows.
This should be the headshot that goes on the wall at Improv Olympic.
The next cab is for Goody Sarah, and man oh man, am I happy to see this holier than thou ho go. She hugs Blondie and tells her she never could have survived it without her. See, bitchy and condescending to everyone else right up until the very end. Well, at least she's consistent. But then she gives some line of crap about how they're all going to grow together after this. "I love you Sarah!" Stripper yells through her tears. Really? And the most brilliant of all...in Goody's headshot, she is actually making one of her patented Goody faces. Like, ugh, can you believe I'm actually having to take a headshot?
Then it's time for Blondie Kimberly to go. She gives a sweet, emotional farewell to Stripper, tells her how proud of her she is, and how great her music is. She tells Stripper that she's beautiful inside and out, and she tells us that Stripper's taught her to be more open minded and less judgmental, and to see the good in people and you know what? Those are great and important lessons. And finally, one of these Real Worlders is copping to actually having learned something from another roommate. Groundbreaking concept. Of course, she has to ruin it by throwing in, "To learn that from someone so young, it's actually humbling." How much younger is Stripper than Blondie? What, two years? Please.
« So You Think You Can Dance: Double the Dancing! Double the Standards! (AKA Mia is Evil!) | Main | Big Brother: Blue Wednesday »
Comments (7)
Ugh Sarah is SO judgemental, I mean who does she think she is?? She was the most boring Real Worlder, why did they cast her??
And Im from Chicago and yes it does get that wet. It snowed soo much this winter and its rained a lot this summer. And that wasent rain that was horrible wet snow!
I love your recaps!
1 of 7 | Posted by lulu5087 | Posted on July 16, 2008 10:58 PM
Hey ChickBomb, lovely recap, you are the perfect mix of heart and rapier-sharp wits, I think you nailed it to the wall.
I did catch the reunion special, and I cannot wait to hear your thoughts on it, especially some of the assholish antics of Dave Dolt, and the special event that happened to Rick James (I don't want to spoil it for those who didn't catch it already). I will say, like you, pretty much any good will I had built up towards most of them was quickly and efficiently erased by what I saw in their reunion special. This show is so sad now. But you made me happy about it again!
love,
xoxo
J-Mo :)
2 of 7 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on July 16, 2008 11:58 PM
"Well, then we get a little more improv action. This never gets interesting."
I could not agree more with this comment! The scenes at the IO are the part of the show when I decide to do laundry instead of watching. I'd much rather see our Real Worlders trapse through the woods in their underwear than "take a class." Who's idea was that anyway? So glad this is over. This show has gone way downhill since Julie and Kevin's fight about racism on the street in front of their loft on Real World New York.
The roommates are way too aware of the cameras now and its the show has gone from a social experiment to signing up to live in a fishbowl for your 15 minutes of fame.
That said, ChickBomb- you rock. Totes happy you're recapping the train wreck that will be I Love Money!
3 of 7 | Posted by OhioAnnie | Posted on July 17, 2008 8:36 AM
ChickBomb, or should I call you Kim? You did a kick ass job with this season, which was one of the best in a while. I liked shortened season w/ hour episodes and hope they keep that up. That comment Dave made about his only regret being hooking up with Kim, I was hoping that was just tongue in cheek, or maybe bad editing to make him look like a jerk. You never know, the next sentence he said could have been that he regretted it because it interfered with their friendship or something. Anyway, I can't wait for your reunion show recap.
4 of 7 | Posted by JasonR | Posted on July 18, 2008 7:08 AM
Chickbomb, love your recaps but not every South Carolinian is small minded and racist! Just thought I would throw that out there!
5 of 7 | Posted by RLR123 | Posted on July 18, 2008 8:03 AM
I don't know why no one has pointed out the obvious- that Sara very well might be racist. Now, I'm not saying that's the case for sure, but it's interesting how she seems to have irrational anger always directed towards the black people in the house(Bri, Nick,Greg)- I believe she led the charge against Greg since the very first episode, talking shit about him so that by the time he entered the house, the guy never had a chance. She jumped all over Bri for sleeping with a guy in their room, but never said a peep when it was Kim and Dave doing the exact same thing, night after night. And she even started this big beef with Nick(clearly the nicest guy in the house) who had done nothing to her(from what I could tell) for no reason whatsoever. When it comes to the white roommates however, Sarah clicked with Kim from day one, never had an issue with Dave at all(even though he was banging away at Kim only feet from where her majesty slept), and was all understanding and sweet to Joey after he personally terrorized her and the other roommates. I think Will was the only exception because he was her little bitch boy, never stepping on her toes, and jumping all over Greg to protect her majesty, as well as letting her know how beautiful and desired she was(barf!). I'm sure Sarah would be horrified at having this accusation directed towards her, but I've seen her type before, and there definitely seems to be a pattern with who receives the brunt of her judgementalism and bitchiness.
6 of 7 | Posted by jazz hands | Posted on July 18, 2008 8:36 PM
Interesting, jazz hands. that definitely makes sense.
Why was Joey still wearing his hard hat in his girlfriend's car? I know it was a piece of shit but it did have a roof right?
7 of 7 | Posted by DP Hooker | Posted on July 19, 2008 1:01 PM