Brooke is trying to be topical tonight, opening with a few heat wave puns: "If the heat has you all hot and bothered, then sit back and relax, because we have the perfect remedy. An amazing hour of the coolest rock and roll on television." Ugh. I'll tell you what is amazing, though: Brooke's fuckme boots. Damb! I wouldn't be surprised to see TheDave drop Tommy and go after Brooke following tonight's broadcast. But only so he can wear the boots, of course.

Brooke says she's been hosting the show for two seasons now, and can't help but notice that something seems different tonight. Do you think she finally picked up on TheDave's pedophile vibe? Nope, just that there's a new drum kit set up behind her. That can only mean one thing: the triumphant return of Pete Best! Actually, they're Tommy's (the fact that they're covered in fur should've been her first clue), and he's going to be sitting in with one of the rockers tonight. Unfortunately, the kit only has a double-bass, so it looks as if Tommy will be playing sans Tripod.

But first... It's time to take a look at the goings on back at the mansion. First off, we get to watch Magni watch a video message from home. Turns out that while he's been gone, his baby learned to walk. Magni missed his baby's first steps? That's so sad. But not to worry. Magni says if he weren't 100% sure of what he's doing here, he'd just go right home. Obviously, Magni's not going to win, because he's only 100% sure, and not the required reality show pledge of 110-1000% sure. Admitting he's only 100% is not a very strategical move on his part. Still, in Iceland being 100% sure is a $2,175,446,700 KRONA BUSINESS!, so maybe it's the right move after all.

During song selection, the rockers learned that Tommy would be playing on "Higher Ground." Right away, Josh and Patrice try to get that song. Josh says he'd do it "Stevie Wonder style, and not Chili Peppers style." I can't believe he didn't even consider doing it Chris Daughtry style. But after thinking it over, he decides that everyone expects him to take the Stevie song, so he says Patrice can have it. It sounds tempting, but should she take the offer? If she does, she'll be under an even bigger microscope than last week, when she was almost eliminated. I haven't seen a choice this difficult since Sophie had to choose between the soup or the salad...

She accepts, but the pressure of performing with The Hatchet Man is obviously getting to her, as we see her jump Ryan's shit for repeatedly saying "Tommy Lee" around her. Ryan says he doesn't know what she's talking about, because that's the first time he's said Tommy's name all day. So who's been trying to psych her out? My guess is that Lukas slipped on The One Ring and has been slinking around the mansion all invisible-like, as sneaky little hobbitses are so wont to do.

Probably because they don't want to see Patrice break down on national television, she gets to perform first tonight. After asking for and receiving a "Hell Yeah!" from the crowd, Tommy makes his way up to the stage. And totally takes over. Patrice does okay vocally, but really seems intimidated to have Tommy playing behind her. But in her defense, who wouldn't be intimidated having Tommy behind them?

TheDave agrees, saying that while Patrice's vocals were "spot on" she disappeared on stage. And he's afraid that the majority of the other performers will do the same thing. Tommy won't comment on Patrice's performance, because when he's playing, he's in his own little world and doesn't really pay attention to what's going on around him. Which is exactly how my cat Beavis gets when he's licking his taint.

| Next Page...  1  |  2  |  3  |  4  ( Comments ) | Discuss In Our Forums Posted by copygodd on August 2, 2006 8:56 AM