Rhymes with "Witch" - 
by copygodd
This was our first night of Rock Star: Supernova without Zayra. Our first night without the possibility of vaginal pyrotechnics. Without histrionical shrieking. Or camel toe. How would the world respond? More importantly, how would the other rockers respond? Who would step forward to carry Zayra's torch? If not firing up a cooter laser, would any of them at least try lighting their farts? Or Dilana's, as decomposing flesh and gas is highly combustible. If so, my money's on Patrice. It's always the soccer moms you have to watch out for.
Brooke opens the show standing with the band, talking about how awesome last week's performance with Dilana featuring Supernova was. But don't just take Brooke's word for it. The producers have a video montage cued up and ready to (rock and) roll. For some reason, they edit out the hoochie footage, but there are still plenty of other things to chuckle over. Namely, the song itself. It's not bad, but it's no "PopoZão" either. It's just not at all what I expected from these guys. Dilana says that after performing with the band last week, she can't see anyone else playing with them but her. I can't help but wonder if she said the same thing about the band she played with while performing this classic. (Muchos grassyass to alert reader Happy Homemaker for the tip.)
During song selection, there were two, count 'em two, original songs up for grabs. Magni opens the session by saying they need to decide who gets the originals first, because nothing else will get done until that's decided. Taking control. That's how Magni rocks it.
Supernova's best songwriting yet.
Ryan wants to do one of the original songs. So does Lukas. And Toby. Storm wants it so badly, she's willing to put on boxing gloves and fight for it. Patrice says she'll stand up on her two feet all night long, and not eat or sleep for one of the originals. That may be how they decide things at PTA, Patrice, but this is Rockstar. Either put 'em up or shut your pie hole.
Magni says since Patrice has been in the bottom three three times, she's earned the chance to perform an original tune. Everyone agrees to that. But who will get the other? To settle it, Magni suggests a little game he likes to call Thunderdome. "You know the law," he tells them. "Two men enter, one man leaves." Except of course, that it's not just men fighting for the song, as it comes down to Ryan versus Storm. She still wants to fight for it, but Ryan says no way. Personally, I don't know why Ryan won't fight her. After all, it's really a win-win situation for him. If he fights her and wins, he gets the original song and a chance to punch Storm in the face. If he fights her and loses, he still got to punch her in the face.
Storm really loves her new guitar.
In the end, though, Storm backs down and agrees to sing "Cryin'" by Aerosmith, because she doesn't think anyone else can sing it. "Something went off in my head," she tells us. "I won't do the original this week. I will do the song, once again, that people are afraid of." Wow, climb down off the cross, Storm. Someone else needs the wood. I wonder if it ever occurred to her that nobody else wanted the Aerosmith song because it sucks?
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