Tabatha asks Martino if his salon is always that chaotic, and he says it is. She counters with questioning if that is the most efficient way to work, and he skates into the Danger Zone as he says "I'd love for you to fit that many clients in that salon and it not be as hectic, chaotic and crammed with people! There are employees that need to work on days that they can't work because there's no station available, okay?" Ummm, okay. Whose fault is that? Tabatha retorts, "So what did you do? Come for me to fix up the appointment book and draw out the schedule for you?... is that why I came all the way here?" She's smiling as she says this, but I wouldn't trust that... they go back to the surveillance tape...
A stylist is taking coloring down out of a client's hair... but the dastardly sink appears to be clogging up...
...and Martino insists that there's no hair in the sink, it's the hair that's slipped through the strainer that's causing these clogs. Tabatha reads my mind and helpfully suggests that he put something in there to dissolve the hair. Martino gets pissed and mutters something unintelligible.
Now we see a woman whose hair has been completely saturated with coloring... apparently her ears have been spackled with it as well. Tabatha asks Martino how he feels seeing that. His response? "She's not my client." Exasperated eye-roll from Tabatha, "It's your salon." Martino is confused "How does what make me feel?" When Tabatha points out how the color is caked all over the clients ears he apparently doesn't see anything wrong with that. Maybe she wanted her ear-hair dyed to match? She likes the burning feeling? It takes her mind off of a scorching yeast infection? Looking on in disbelief, Lady T soldiers on...
Oh wow, here's a lawsuit waiting to happen...
He's stroking the back of the stylist's hair, and she asks if he could wipe the sweat off her brow. He asks if he can lick it off! And he does!! Making a big "khhheow!" sound as he gets a tongue-full of Maybelline. Oh, ICK! Tabatha is looking at him like he's a new and interesting species of ape. He says "What?" Back on video, he's up in some client's face kissing on her! He's licking another client! He has another woman come sit on his lap...
..."You don't mind if I tweak your daughter's nipple, do you?"...
T-girl is absolutely aghast at his behavior. Martino think it's funny. "What? That's why these people come!" Oh, don't flatter yourself Marty. I'd bet 7/8ths of them are frantically asking for antibacterial gel within seconds of you leaving earshot. And yeah, so the other 8th are probably turned on, but still, ew! Tabatha point out the obvious, "Martino, it's disgusting! You lick everyone!" Lady T interviews that Marty is too busy being an idiotic fool to notice his dire situation that could lead to him losing everything.
Mack-Daddy Marty challenges Tabatha, "Why do I have such a large clientele that adore me? Why?" My response would have been one word. Tastelessness. But Lady T takes a different approach, "My question to you would be why do you want me here?" He admits he's losing a lot of money and wants her to give him a loan for a cool half-mil. Okay, no he doesn't (although it would have been fun to watch her decapitate him with her bare hands) instead he says he needs suggestions from her. Tabatha agrees, but it seems like ManlyMarty doesn't think there's anything wrong with acting like an oversexed middle-schooler grinding up on clients and stylists alike. She reminds him that he's the owner, so everyone is going to look up to him as the benchmark of their behavior. Well, look down is more like it. Tabatha has reached the end of her tether, and demands his keys. Martino laughingly says "I hate you!" but Lady T will not be denied. Mack-Daddy digs deep in his pocket and produces his keys (probably giving his doorbells a good jangle on the way up) and hands them over. I think you might wanna have those sterilized, Tabatha...
THE TAKEOVER
Tabatha marches into Giovanni & Pileggio and gathers the stylists around. My GOD there's a lot of hair in there! She introduces herself and announces the takeover is in progress, because Martino has reached out to her for help. She gives them the same line about everything changing, some of them may not have jobs, blah blah blah. I wanna see your ass fire a bitch, Tabatha! I wanna see some crazy! You better deliver at some point, girl!
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Comments (10)
j-mo! 2 things:
1. i am not reading this yet because i dvr'd the episode and haven't seen it yet.
2. in case you didn't see my response to your comment on my recap, in my former life, i was mrsdaddytom. i picked a new name since i'm not the top chef recapper and i also wanted to do the audition thing anonymously in case i sucked. regardless, along with being fellow snarkettes in impossible love with each other, we are now sister-show-recappers. and i think i love you more than ever. just wanted you to know that info.
3. once i see the show, i will read your recap and comment accordingly. because i love you. tons.
xoxox!
1 of 10 | Posted by AuJew | Posted on September 9, 2008 9:28 PM
I grew up in Sewell, and my parents still live there- about 1/2 a mile from Martino's Salon.
Too bad Tabatha didn't stop by last year, when he still had his Lamborghini. All summer long, it would sit on the sidewalk outside the salon, with it's doors wide open, and blasting Frank Sinatra music.
It's true he's well known- he's a bit of a joke in town. He's notorious for being a drama queen, and doing whatever he can to get attention.
Apparently, every year at Christmas, he gives tours of his house so everyone can see his decorations.
2 of 10 | Posted by madpuppy | Posted on September 10, 2008 9:07 AM
Yet another excellent recap.
Besides their being so amusing, I am amazed at how informative these are (probably more so than actually watching the show!)
Thanks!
3 of 10 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on September 10, 2008 11:14 AM
Fantastic recap! Thank you! I just discovered this show and am enjoying it and your recap immensely!
madpuppy- thank you! I just knew there had to be someone out there in tvgasmland who knew this guy! What is the cost of a cut there? Not because I want to fly out and get licked (perhaps he is keeping his tongue to himself now?) but I am curious as how he has did 1.3 million last year running a filthy salon like that. But unlike that first owner, to his credit this guy seems to take LadyT's advice.
4 of 10 | Posted by mrsc | Posted on September 10, 2008 11:15 AM
J-Mo Your recaps are fabulous. I recently had to sacrafice my cable package that gets me Bravo (tears!) and you have helped fill the void! The "pay for school or pay for cable " decision is a bummer!
Muah! :)
OmigodYouGuys
5 of 10 | Posted by onigodyouguys | Posted on September 10, 2008 11:40 AM
Love this site and especially your recaps j-mo. Just wanted to let you know that during the summer, there is plenty of perfect pool weather in new Jersey; all last week, it was sunny and the temps were in the mid 80's
6 of 10 | Posted by kristykristy | Posted on September 10, 2008 12:29 PM
Dio mio, I want to smash his Roman nose!
Chis March called and he wants his shirt back! lol
Thanks for the recap, J-Mo! I couldn't watch it, but reading your recaps is even better!
7 of 10 | Posted by detinha | Posted on September 10, 2008 4:22 PM
Hey Jmo,
Still haven't done my spy work, but I did find the address and it's not to far out of the way, but at a weird intersection for a drive by. The web site seemed very together so I think they're still up and running.
I can't help but wonder how much of this stuff is set up . . . . perhaps drama was laughing coz they just spent the night backing up the vacuum all over the dryer hoods.
Blow dryers from the ceiling sound cool!
Thanks for the laughs, baby!
8 of 10 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on September 10, 2008 4:39 PM
Great job, J-Mo! Next week looks just TOO good to miss. Animal!!
Lots O' Love
9 of 10 | Posted by arizonatom | Posted on September 11, 2008 10:06 PM
AuJew... Welcome, welcome and thank you for the love, I can't wait to see the next recap of your G-Ram show, and I love you, too! :)
madpuppy... Oooooooh, THANK you SO much for the inside info on Martino & Co., somehow none of it goes against the stereotype, how weird is that? But you know, we LIVE for inside gossip like this, so THANK YOU! *mwah*
fire@will... thank you again, I am honored, but keep in mind, I often make shit up, so don't take everything at face value, K?
mrsc... Awww, thank you, I'm so glad you're enjoying the show!...
ohmigodyouguys... Aww, thanks and I'm so sorry to hear about your cable package drama! Check online at places like surfthechannel dot c om or yidio d ot com to see if Tabatha's shows actually show up there, sometimes they do!
kristykristy... heyyy, thanks, and I know you're totally right, Jersey DOES get really warm, I forget that not everyone considers 75-degree water "too cold to swim in" like we do out here in Arizona... my bad! :)
detinha... thank you as always!
juddfan... yeah, I wonder if some of the stuff is set up, but hey, it's a reality show, so not everything is going to be real! LOL! But those ceiling-suspended blow-dryers were awesome...
arizonatom... thank you, and I will have the new episode posted soon, K?
Thanks for all your comments guys... keep 'em comin!
love, J-Mo :)
10 of 10 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on September 14, 2008 12:51 PM