Back out with the assembled staff at the end of the day, Tabatha points out that Tim's pricing is actually on the lower end of the range at HairLab! Huh? Shouldn't getting in to have your hair done by the owner of the salon be a tad more expensive, than, say, to see weird-ass Twitchy Julie Ann? Ah, but it turns out that Twitchy has some of the highest prices in the entire salon! Being Queen Of Denial as always, Julie Ann insists, "I really don't charge that much!" Not according to Tabatha, who says that she has recommended to Kathy and Tim that she actually lower her pricing so that she can be aligned with everyone else in the salon...
...Now for a big mouthful of Humble Pie...
I don't know, call me crazy, but I get the feeling that her pricing scale being higher than most of the other stylists may have been news to the others, cuz she sure looks guilty as hell, and I wonder if that's why she tried to play it down like she wasn't gouging for her meager skills. I don't know how independent stylist pricing works, but I imagine it might be one of those touchy subjects not often discussed in the open. For someone who has such a hard time even talking to people (and add in her nervous tics) I would have thought she was on the lower end to begin with. Well, she's gonna wind up there anyhow...
Next she brings up the whole Mazi-Erin-Blue-Hair-Fiasco, and Tim points out how unhappy Erin was, especially with Miss Mazi arguing with her. Miss Rotty still refuses to capitulate that she was an argumentative bitch! "I want to hear one word from somebody who know me a little bit better than you!" she spits at Tabatha. So Timbo steps up and says "Rules can't keep being broken. If they are, there's gonna be probation, and if people can't work and live with us, well then HairLab might not be the best place for you..."
...y'hear that, Miss Muzzle? You just got served! BOO-yah!!...
Tabatha is impressed by his speechifying, "You sound like an owner, my friend!" All the stylists (except Miss Mazi-Rotty) clap and cheer... and Tabatha gives him back the keys to the Lab! And with that she's out... until...
SIX WEEKS LATER
Lady T hopes that as she goes back to HairLab that they've put their business plan in action to pay Kathy back... and that Miss Mazi has been fired. Okay, so she didn't say that, but why should Tabatha be the only one who has hopes and dreams for the HairLab, huh? Of course, anybody in SoCal and especially the Valley (and especially the west Valley) who's been watching tonight won't likely let Miss Thing get within a hundred yards of their hair, much less arguing distance.
Timbo and Kathy meet with T-girl and say business is growing, they're getting a lot of referrals (maybe some from their cheap flyers) and Kathy says she is finally making some more money, because last month she actually took home three thousand! Time to buy some hamburger to go with the Helper! Inquiring after their plan to pay Kathy back, Tim says the deal is already done and in place, and that they have "other business things going on..."
...let me guess... they're gonna invest in more "safety orange" furniture...
Taking Lady T's advice to have a more active role in "his" salon, Tim is actually going to take over everything and Kathy is going to be leaving the salon altogether in the next six months! "What are you going to do?" asks Tabatha. "I have a couple of friends in Tulsa that are in the real-estate business and I'm going to join them in the real-estate business!" she says happily. Is she serious? Real Estate? Does she think this is 2005 or something? Something seems fishy here...
*gay-gasp* I wonder if Timbo never changed the partnership agreement and finally used his controlling interest in the business to force Kathy out, and now she's leaving California because she can no longer afford to live there! If she's not at HairLab and drawing her paltry salary, then that's more money for Tim to spend on stuff! And maybe Miss Mazi is his secret lover who all this time has been the one really controlling the salon! Ew.
Oh well, I guess whatever they want to say, that's their business, but it just looks really suspicious to me. Then again, I am kinda suspicious by nature (it just comes naturally, like a dash of fabulousness).
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Comments (9)
Dahling J-Mo,
How sad that next week is the finale : (
I really don't understand how these "salons" get regular customers. I know I'm high maintenance, but I would have walked out of most of them before the stylists got anywhere near my hair. And, seriously, I'd probably go completely nuts on any stylist that tried to get my hubby to kiss her. Watching Tabitha whip these pathetic people into shape has been amazingly cathartic, and reading your recaps has been amazingly fun.
I'd love to do an undercover to her salon, just to see if it lives up to her standards. Of course, my own stylist would probably strangle me, jealous bitch that he is.
As always, awesome, awesome recap.
Hugs,
Yenta
1 of 9 | Posted by yentapatrol | Posted on October 9, 2008 4:16 PM
I've only watched this show once and that was because I read J-Mo's f#cking funny as hell recap. (It was the one where the douche named Michael denied everything that was wrong with his salon) That being said I am dvring this episode ASAP!!!! I was hysterically laughing my ass off the whole way through. I have to see this. I've never heard anyone besides my brothers use the term "pussy punch". My mouth dropped open when I read that and then howled with laughter. And I am here to tell you that shit hurts. Guard you labias, ladies, when the "Witherspoon" boys are fighting!!!! Kudos & kisses, J-Mo!!!!!!!!
2 of 9 | Posted by ReeseWitherspoon | Posted on October 9, 2008 9:15 PM
Great recap (of course).
I had similar feelings about the real estate business story - I wondered how long ago did they film this, anyway??
Hopefully, she sold her house for enough to buy the better half of Tulsa. Still, I wonder if Tim is just doing more of the same - and if his aunt will ever get her money back.
I'm betting she'll be dealing with a more honest group of people in Oklahoma.
3 of 9 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on October 10, 2008 11:24 AM
J-Mo;
Thanks so much for the great recap, as always. I actually missed the first couple of minutes of this one and I didn't know until reading this that $8K-a-month-Tim was the NEPHEW of $2K-a-month-Kathy! That makes him all that much more of an asshole. I thought that it was priceless when Tabby-Kat was calling him out on taking so much salary that all he could say was that he had expenses at home he had to cover. I wonder if that includes two cars for himself, champagne parties (but not for his staff) and horribly tacky furniture and decor like Martino went for. What a putz - what a pair of putzes without a pair.
And who decides to have their own business, but doesn't want to be in charge and treat it like a business and be successful? If anything, you'd think that any business owner would fall to the side of too much control, rather than too little. At least Kwanna @ TEN Salon took an (over)active role in trying to manage the salon and have people do their jobs correctly (according to the foot-thick rule books). Geez, these two together can't even beat out the (formerly) laid-back Tami from The Loft on Broadway in Long Beach.
It makes me wonder how these places (as well as some of the restaurants that Gordon Ramsey turns around) stay open as long as they have.
Anyway - keep up the great work! You always have me in stitches when I read your recaps! You are just too twisted for color television ... and I LURVE that! Big HUG!
Lots O' Love
4 of 9 | Posted by arizonatom | Posted on October 12, 2008 9:59 AM
Karen Carpenter! That's it! I couldn't think of who Twitchy Julie Ann looked like. Thank you J-Mo. It was driving me nuts. I knew it was somebody from the seventies and it was just on the tip of my tongue. All I could come up with was "hungover," "coke whore," and "bar hag."
This season went by so fast. Like Gordon Ramsay, Tabatha should always be on tv. I'll miss this show and your recaps, J-Mo. Hopefully after Top Design is over you'll get another show?
5 of 9 | Posted by shelleyh | Posted on October 13, 2008 7:33 AM
Sorry Jmo, didn't get a chance to comment last week. Karen Carpenter, so tragic, so sad, such a guilty musical pleasure!!!
That said, I smell douche coming from the direction of loving nephew . . . ugh and ARGH!!! She should have an insurance policy on him, then kill him, I'm just saying. I can't see any way or reason they would have him 2% ahead, except for him being a class A douche, and not even spring rain scent, more like the vinegar!!!! Sour, bitter vinegar!!!
And BTW, I absolutely cant wait, bated breath, for your top design recap!!!! I wasn't sure I could believe my eyes and ears on that one!!!
Till then . . . mwah!
6 of 9 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on October 13, 2008 1:35 PM
my darling j-mo,
i have been horribly reticent lately, but i have an excuse: lack of internet access!!! i moved to a new apartment that literally overlooks the ocean, but i haven't gotten cable/internet up and running yet. and superbusy time at work so...finally got a moment to read your brilliant recap!!!
you kill me, though. i have to say when i was reading the description of mazi, i was concerned about my own tendency to flirt with fabulous gay men...but purely in an ironic way, of course. and i only sexually harass those who are open to it.
much love! xoxox
7 of 9 | Posted by aujew | Posted on October 14, 2008 12:30 PM
Omggg as a fellow SFV-ian all I have to say is this salon is within walking distance of my work and that I don't know how such a tacky place is even on Ventura Blvd. Too bad I missed Tabatha :( it would of been nice to tell her that at least 3/4 of America would support her if she brought a tazer gun on shoot and started zapping these crazy hairdresser nuts.
8 of 9 | Posted by Pinkberries | Posted on October 15, 2008 10:20 PM
Yentapatrol... you are too kind (in fact, you're every kind) of sweetness and light for saying such nice things as you do. Yes, it will be sad that it has to come to an end, but I bet the show gets picked up for renewal, cuz with the economy swirling down the toilet, I bet there are going to be a LOT more troubled salons to choose from now... love to you...
ReeseWitherspoon... thanks for the sweet compliments! And I want you to know that I have never ever ever puss-punched anyone in my entire life... but I imagine if it hurts half as bad as getting kicked in the balls... anyhow, I'm so happy to bring you some happy, too! Love to you...
fire@will... thank you as always, and yeah, that whole real-estate thing seemed fishy and I'm thinking now that that dickbag nephew of hers forced her out and refuses to pay her back... love to you, though...
arizonatom... gosh you're sweet... be careful laying on the niceties too thick, I'm likely to tumble into bed with you... love to you...
shelleyh... I just love the phrase "coke whore" because it's versatile... it could refer to hard narcotic usage or someone who has sex for soft drinks (hey, if you were really super duper thirsty)... I don't know what I'll be doing after Top Design... I might take the holidays off, cuz there's a show I have my eye on that starts in January... love to you...
juddfan... chile, I ain't ashamed to admit that I loves me some Karen Carpenter... very few voices in the world have ever come close to hers, and between her and Selena, I have plenty of tragic divas to pine over... and if Timbo doesn't get his priorities straight, he's gonna wind up with a closed salon... and it would serve him right, too! Love to you...
AuJew... girl, I wondered where you been and who's been doin' thangs to you! I'm needing more doses of Gordon Ramsey, and soon! And don't feel bad about hitting on gay guys, it happens all the time, the thing I DISlike is Mazi's "artless" way of going about it, someone who is that tacky and obvious just makes you feel all squicky inside, and I don't like that at all. Love to you...
Pinkberries... Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Pleeeeeeze you MUST go at least check it out and see if Mazi-Rotty is working there still and let us know, pleeeeease? With sugar on top? Love to you...
Thank you everybody for your genuine and heartfelt comments. I am also sad this show is ending soon BUT you're going to have to wait until next week for the recap of the finale as I am off to Los Angeles today to hang out with my BFF (and another recapper) and have a drink or twelve... see you next week!
love, J-Mo :)
9 of 9 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on October 17, 2008 9:34 AM