When Scott tells her that he is thinking of getting married and having children, Sheila quite bluntly replies, "Oh no don't do that." Scott asks "don't do what?" and Sheila responds, "Get married or have children." Ouch. Sheila drives away after that and Scott goes to get a shot to wash down all that pride he just swallowed.

Next, Doc Ali sends Scott to a preschool to interact with some small children. Just what Scott needs: time spent with a bunch of people who are more mature than him. Scott puts on his standard little boy attire (see preview: t-shirt with white long sleeved shirt underneath) grabs his lunch box, and heads to preschool. It was like watching a disturbing Italian version of Billy Madison. Such train wreckage. I couldn't look away.

Scott totally showed up in the same outfit as the blond boy. AWKWARD.

When Scott gets to the preschool he looks completely confused, totally uncomfortable, and somewhat terrified. I don't know what it is about little children that can get that look on a man's face. That look like someone just dropped him off in front of a prison in nothing but a pink tutu.

Needless to say, Scott's time in preschool was a little uneventful. One little girl repeatedly told Scott that her mom was picking her up before naptime. Scott seemed baffled by her repeating it so much. Welcome to the world of children, Scott. That's what little kids do; they say the same thing a hundred times. Incidentally, they also have speech impediments, pee themselves and cry. They're like little tiny drunk people.

Instead of being patient, Scott spent the morning repeatedly and sarcastically asking the little girl what time her mom was picking her up. Nothing says gentleman like a grown man mocking a three year old. I guess they edited out the part where he teased little Mikey for not saying his Rs clearly and then stole his teddy bear. When naptime finally comes, Scott lays down with the children until they fall asleep, at which point he sneaks out the door. Which reminds me- chapter three of the womanizing handbook: How to get out of bed without waking her up.

He left Moviefone's number by the pitcher of lemonade.

Finally, "meet your girlfriend's daughter" day arrives! Scott doesn't want to show up empty handed so he goes to Costco with all the boys to buy Renee's daughter a present. Johnny Tupperware suggests a kiddy pool, but I think he just wants to see a 17 year old girl in a bathing suit. Is there a word for young tupperware? Or little tupperware? Or not quite tupperware? I wish there were, because calling him Johnny Seran Wrap just doesn't have the same ring to it.

Instead, Scott finds an old lady to ask for a suggestion. Before she'll offer one, she wants Scott to help her take some heavy items off the shelf for her. Atta girl, grandma, make him work for the info! Fifteen minutes and ten pounds of kitty litter later, Scott gets his suggestion: a blender. Hardly worth the shit going IN to the kitty litter if you ask me, but Scott's desperate. So instead of getting an actual blender, he takes Grandma Calico's basic idea and sticks with housewares. This makes me miss Manuel. He hasn't returned my calls since the "rosary incident." I'm lost without him.

Leftovers got her number. All by himself.

Scott picks up a toaster oven and calls it a day. Then he heads over to Renee's house hoping for a little of the hibbiddy dibbiddy before introduction time. Doc Ali would be sweating through her cardigan if she saw Scott trying to break the celibacy rule and the no seeing Renee rule all at once. (I don't blame you Scott, if you're gonna do it, do it right). No dice for Scott though, as Renee makes up some crap about being busy and having to go to work. Which in girl talk translates to: eat your heart out as I continue the torture in hopes that you will miss me beyond the point of recovery and finally make me an honest woman. I love Renee now because she clearly knows how to play the game. Wear some extra perfume so it stays on his clothes after you hug him and he has to smell you all day honey! Viva la Renee!