Just when you think it couldn't get any worse, VampiRoy stops them yet again! Underdog Nicole actually stamps her feet and says "Jeez!" in frustration. So cute. 25 minutes have passed and now the clients are all going to go back to their original stylist. So much for Bitchy Charlie's plans to get rid of the bitch with the difficult hair, and they've only got 20 minutes left to finish their clients off (or slip them some champagne and Vicodin like they did the Housewives of OC, so hopefully they'll be drunk and not notice the Chia Pets they've all sprouted off the tops of their heads). Exotic Nekisa got her girl back and says her hair turned out perfect... except that it's "a little heavy" and immediately asks her client who cut her hair. When the client confesses that Charlie did, Nekisa makes a "Now I have someone to blame!" sound. Of course.
Speaking of Bitchy Charlie, he notices "Meredith, you ended up with your redhead!" and Drag Queen Meredith replies "I towtally dyid!" and then Charlie asks the $64,000.00 question that's been on my mind since the day I first laid eyes on Meredith... he says "Why are your balls so big?"... and Meredith replies without a trace of irony, "You know what? Iy'v bin aysking mysyelf thyat questyion my whole lyife!" I just fell on the floor laughing and rolling hysterically and mashing cheese popcorn and preztels into the carpeting. Charlie counters, "It makes me nervous!" and Meredith comes back with, "It myakes eyevrybody nervous!" and Charlie admits, "It makes me feel like a little girl!" Oh my. Ohhhhhh my. LOVE it!
..."哎呀粪!" ("Oh shit!")...
And now it's time to see just how this is going to play out, cuz VampiRoy is about to go on a VampiRage and judge these busted-up hairstyles!
...From left to right... Nausea. Heartburn. Indigestion. Upset Stomach. Diarrahea...
First up is Underdog Nicole...
Nicole says she and her client were really clear about exactly what she wanted to do, and Nicole made sure it was happening throughout the entire process. I think she threatened the stylestants on either side of her with supergluing their urinary tracts shut if they fucked with her plans. Good move, Nicole, cuz VampiRoy says overall it was pretty good.
Next up is Dallas Daniel, and VampiRoy leans in real close for a good look...
...and someone wishes they had a garlic necklace... or a crucifix...
Daniel says he immediately thought "brahtness arayound the face would be really pretty!" and VampiRoy seems to think that Daniel did a good job of "keeping this natural beauty... a natural beauty." Huh? So, Daniel added three highlights and parted her hair on the other side and that's considered good work? Wow, where's Tabatha when you need her to kick some ass?
Now here's poor Drag Queen Meredith...
..."Yup, I look like shit, don't I?"...
Choosing his words carefully, VampiRoy asks DQ Meredith "Tell me, how did you end up with... this tone of... red?" and Meredith bravely asserts that she is the artist and she feels she chose the right tone of red for her client. Bitchy Charlie begs to differ, "That Kool-Aid Red, honey, it was a mmmmmmess! It was only halfway done, she didn't have time to finish it.... and it was fugly!" Unfortunately VampiRoy felt that it "didn't quite hit it" for him, and that there were a lot of other shades that "probably could have been a little bit more flattering for her." Wow, that is the most diplomatic way of saying "Meredith, you fucked up." that I have ever heard. I am impressed VampiRoy! Now, go put some Wella Balsam in that oily mop of yours, looking at it is making me itchy.
Which brings us to Lesbiana Dee...
Dee's model apparently had wanted to color her hair darker, but Dee threatened to skull fuck her 'til her eyes popped out if she didn't let her do her lighter highlights (that she naturally excels at, I mean look at her own hair). VampiRoy agrees that Lesbiana Dee's way was better. What happened to all that "you have to listen to your client?" bullshit we heard last week? The words "contradictory" and "arbitrary" come into mind... and the client really doesn't look like she's all that thrilled with it, either...
...I was surprised she didn't wind up looking like this!...
Now it's time for Emo Gail...
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Comments (5)
good recap again! But I have to say, I'm definitely not feeling the recap being broken up into 2 seperate parts. AT ALL. I prefer to read about it all at once.
1 of 5 | Posted by serjen | Posted on July 19, 2008 9:24 AM
Boo hoo, I wanted both parts of the recap to be up at the same time (I know, I know, it's all want, want, want, and what have I done for you lately?)
It was hilarious. THANK YOU for the Paulo reaction shot to Dee's comment. Loved it!
Bubblehead-isa reminds me too much of Hilda Suarez. Hilda has the redeeming quality that she's a FICTIONAL character. Nekisa... well. I picture this as her inner monologue: "(crickets chirping)...(crickets chirping) I'm pretty! (crickets chirping) I have a husband! (crickets chirping)"
I will miss Meredith. I liked her dry humor. I wish Nekisa was gone. And hell, NO, who could miss Oshun and Matthew???????
2 of 5 | Posted by sayhuh | Posted on July 19, 2008 6:03 PM
OMG, I am so sorry guys, I promise next time I will publish both parts at the same time, seriously, it was almost 5:00am and I just couldn't do any more... please forgive!
love, J-Mo :)
3 of 5 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on July 20, 2008 12:36 AM
I have to agree with Dee on the message, but not necessarily the delivery. If you have a client, and you've discussed what is going to happen with her hair, when you pass her off to another stylist you communicate that plan so it doesn't come out a f'ed up mess. Much like most of the clients in this challenge. In the end, whether you finish the style or not, because you consulted and developed a plan, she is your client. You own up to it and follow up on it.
That being said, does anyone else thing the length of time they give on some of these challenges is messed up? These could be some of the most talented stylists in the nation, but the time limits can be unrealistic. 1.5 hours to consult, color, cut and style? Not in the real world. Sure they, should be able to work fast, but when you factor in nerves and pressure, it's too much to accomplish. The producers should realize that when success in a challenge is the exception, not the norm.
4 of 5 | Posted by marishka | Posted on July 21, 2008 9:04 AM
J-Mo, dont you sweat the 2 part recap... you are hilarious as always and no-one should stay up past 5am unless they're getting laid or paid....xoxoxo
5 of 5 | Posted by BlueBee | Posted on July 22, 2008 8:51 AM