First and most importantly we have the head judge and producer Sean Patterson, the president of Wilhelmina Models. I have to admit that this impresses me and makes the whole shebang look a lot more legitimate in my eyes. After a little googling, I also unearth that Sean Patterson may be a bit of a reality show junky having also launched and starred in the VH1 show, "The Agency". Sean tells us that they are looking for more than looks, they're looking for that certain special something about the woman's personality that makes them say "wow" that person would be very marketable. Sean is clearly a no-nonsense type of guy who's bound and determined to be the little General of our troops:
Oops, wrong General Patterson
Our fearless leader
Our next judge is Robert Verdi and I'm having one of those 'love at first sight' kind of things. Robert runs what he calls a creative services company which involves handling celebrity lives and styling/dressing them for the red carpet. Just in case we're tempted to dismiss Robert as one of those 'brothers of cousins of the producer', we're shown a clip of him schmoozing with Jessica Simpson; so, now we know he's the real deal.
The men's room is over there.
Robbie has decided to go the 'bald is beautiful route' and is wearing sunglasses perched firmly on his shaved head. I'm already impressed with his ability to accessorize. He tells us that with a mature model they're looking for someone who is a friendlier beauty, who has a depth of character and you can see that in their eyes.
Our last judge introduces herself as Beverly...dramatic pause...Johnson and I have to say that Bev is looking mighty fine. It's hard to believe that she was the first African American model to grace the cover of Vogue way back in 1974, which in model years makes her roughly a gazillion years old. At any rate, she's old enough to have petrified, which might account for the complete paralysis of the majority of her face; the only thing moving when this woman speaks is her jaw. Seriously, do botox people never look at each other or do they just assume that it's just the other person who looks like a ventriloquist's dummy?
Could you push my cheeks up? I want to smile now.
Bev tells us that what they're looking for is someone who still has a sense of fashion, style, of who they are, where they've been and where they want to go.
And, with the judges and their criteria out of the way, we start our audition search.
Shelly Slinker is our first contestant. The name may sound like a comic book villain, or a twisted attempt at a soft porn name, but Shelly actually seems like a sweet innocent kind of girl. She's a 43 year old tall, slender blond, who's pretty in a Midwestern country club/mall kind of way and she's got no edge whatsoever. Shelly tells us that when she was young she had the opportunity to go to Europe and model, but, sadly, she gave it all up and she's always been very mad at herself. She tells the judges that when she was 17 or 18 she was told that she was going to be one of the next supermodels, but instead she decided to marry her high school sweetheart and stay home to raise her children. And we're off to a hopeful start as the judges unanimously decide to pass Shelly on to the next round. However, as she exits the stage I can't help noticing that she has one of those weird bent knee walks which look really strange in heels. You know, where the person never steps out on to a straight leg so they're always kind of, well...I hate to say it...but, slinking along.
Miss Jay would have a cow over this one.
We're treated to a quick clip of Bev saying "lets get a jiggy" and the editors give us some hopping music to listen to while we watch a montage of various women desperately trying to get jiggy for the judges. Then, Ernestine arrives and everything comes to a crashing silence.
They want character? Well, here's character.
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Comments (9)
paula was on sci fi channel's who wants to be a superhero season 2 as "whip snap" and the website says her age was 31 (that show aired in the summer of 2007).
1 of 9 | Posted by intense | Posted on June 8, 2008 7:18 PM
Intense: You completely made my day!!! I knew there was something off about the way she gave her age. But I don't understand why they caught Sharon and not Paula? Anyhoo, thanks for the info, I'll see what I can dig up on her superhero gig.
Hugs,
Yenta
2 of 9 | Posted by yentapatrol | Posted on June 9, 2008 5:57 AM
yenta I'm so excited you are recapping this show. I caught the first episode and I am already in love w/ it. I love Sharon and the soccer mom chick.
I thought there was something suspicious about Paula. She really reminds me of that tough girl that was on ANTM last season... the one that tried out the year before too..?
3 of 9 | Posted by tvkitty | Posted on June 9, 2008 9:11 AM
tvkitty - you're thinking of Marvita and she totally remindes me of her too!!
I'm so happy someone is recapping this show -- and I'm really happy I didn't forget to DVR it.
I really like Sharon - she seems really genuine and full of personality and I like the French lady - she's gorgeous!
Can't wait to see what the coming episodes bring and I LOVE that Robert Verdi is a judge...he cracks me up!! :)
4 of 9 | Posted by smolls | Posted on June 9, 2008 9:51 AM
Man! I keep missing all these new shows that I might even like . . . after this frothy recap, Yenta, I think I'm hooked!!! Can't believe the bit about the multiple personality, and too funny all the Kimsicle references. From the pics, I'm not getting Hope in the mix, she's too young looking to me . . . Love me some tough looking women, like a Marvita or a Paula . . . can't wait to catch the show!
5 of 9 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on June 9, 2008 4:04 PM
tvkitty, I'll have to pay more attention to the soccermom, I'm embarrassed to admit that I kind of glossed over her in my own mind.
Smolls, we can be the I heart Robert Verdi club. I'll order t-shirts, or maybe sunglasses...: )
Juddfan, after 8 weeks of Viva Hollywood, I have high hopes born out of desperation. Let's keep our fingers crossed that this continues to be hoot.
Hugs,
Yenta
6 of 9 | Posted by yentapatrol | Posted on June 10, 2008 4:54 PM
Paula is TOTALLY marvita's mom/sister!!!
I am rooting for the French lady...I don't like the fake tan perfect Liza minelli mom....
Hope is fun and cool, but looks too young for this show!
Love Robert Verdi and Kim Alexis is a total robot!
7 of 9 | Posted by melpadgett | Posted on June 11, 2008 6:19 AM
you know kim alexis doesn't seem so bad after you watch Haylie duff be the "mentor" on the search for ell woods.
8 of 9 | Posted by intense | Posted on June 11, 2008 7:55 AM
Well, I did get to see the show on line, and super kuddos for the recap, it was like your words in pictures . . . and YES, Beverly does not move in her face, even her lips move a little crooked from uneven freezing--but she's gorgeous just the same, gotta give it up to Granny, she looks fan-f'in-tastic!!! How she kept her skin so smooth, I'll never know. Didn't like the swedish blonde, but after the scenes for next week, I'm utterly intriqued--she took up bass at 39--my kinda girl!!! Can't wait to see why she thinks she's there for comic relief . . . lastly, me kinda likey Sean Patterson--which is surprising, as those types usually curdle my milk! ( I mean the hollywood muckity-muck types)
9 of 9 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on June 11, 2008 11:38 AM