The judges' last stop is NYC and, as always, New Yorkers are nothing if not colorful.
We start with Anna, who is 39 years old and has multiple personality disorder. Upon hearing this, the General utters a succinct, "Jesus" and wonders which one of his production assistants is going to get his ass fired. Anna assures the judges that all of her personalities are really sweet, except for the one that comes out when she's been crossed, or passed over on a reality show audition; that personality is the mean one. In the interest of establishing the level of danger that eliminating her would place them in, the General asks what would happen if Robbie was her boyfriend and he cheated on her. Well, Anna would punch him and it would hurt. Alot.
I would so love to see her star as The Bachelorette
Alrighty then, time to judge and the General strategically passes the decision on to his co-judges. Robbie, being a smart young man, stresses how much he loves Anna and that he thinks she's really beautiful, but, sadly, he sees her more as an actress. Bev suggests that Anna takes up professional boxing and then votes no. Clearly, Bev isn't as easily intimidated by wackjobs as the boys are.
Celeste is 50 years old and feisty. The General asks her, "How old are you, honey?" And Celeste snaps back, "I'm fifty, honey." Celeste isn't one to let that "honey" crap float by.
I may not have multiple personalities, but that doesn't mean I won't go all diva on your ass.
The General takes this without a blink, saying that he wouldn't have guessed 40. Celeste smiles and takes the opportunity to mention that not only was she in the modeling business when she was younger, but she had been in a show with Bev a number years past. Bev isn't looking so thrilled, but the boys love it and get Bev up on the runway to do a walkoff with Celeste.
Out of my way, Bitch!
I think it's pretty safe to say the Bev rules the runway. But, Celeste still passes on to the semifinals.
Laurie is fifty and has five kids aged twenty-nine to fifteen. The judges love her, decide she's gorgeous and she passes on to the semi-finals.
This one is my husband's favorite so far. Hmmmmm.
A shorter, but adorable, African American woman named Hope comes out and before she can catch her breath the General demands that she tell them her deepest, darkest secret. Hope says flat out that she likes very young guys. Robbie perks right up at that one and asks how young? Mindful of the legal limit, Hope tells him eighteen, but I'm guessing that she wouldn't object to a cute sixteen year old. Robbie asks her if she's ever shoplifted, because, hey, maybe they could hang out together sometime. Hope happily says, "yes" and Robbie wants to know what was the most expensive thing she ever shop lifted. Hope tells him a fur coat and Robbie is thrilled gushing, "You go girl." Now, excuse me, before I get all caught up in this girl bonding moment, isn't shop-lifting a pastime for teenage girls grabbing makeup or starving old people grabbing food? In my mind a fur coat kind of exceeds the idea of shop lifting and is more like major theft. Bev suggests that Hope is a thrill seeker and asks if she realizes that modeling is boring. Hope earnestly tells her that if you love something it can't be boring. The General, apparently not a stickler on the point of ethical behavior, loves her personality calling her both enigmatic and magnetic. On a more practical note, Robbie asks her how tall she is. Sadly, Hope is only 5 1/2 feet, which as we all know is way too short for a model. Bev says she thinks Hope is lovely and funny, but she doesn't know if she could be a model. Hope demands to know why? And waffling, Bev says she's torn. The General takes command and tells Hope to get her ass down there and so he can inspect her face. After checking out her profile, the judges decide to unanimously pass her despite the height issue and the fact that they're going to have hire extra security for the wardrobe staff. After she leaves the room, Hope has crying breakdown and, you know, I might be wrong, but I'm thinking Hope is an adorable little sociopath.
I like to mug little old ladies.Is that a problem?
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Comments (9)
paula was on sci fi channel's who wants to be a superhero season 2 as "whip snap" and the website says her age was 31 (that show aired in the summer of 2007).
1 of 9 | Posted by intense | Posted on June 8, 2008 7:18 PM
Intense: You completely made my day!!! I knew there was something off about the way she gave her age. But I don't understand why they caught Sharon and not Paula? Anyhoo, thanks for the info, I'll see what I can dig up on her superhero gig.
Hugs,
Yenta
2 of 9 | Posted by yentapatrol | Posted on June 9, 2008 5:57 AM
yenta I'm so excited you are recapping this show. I caught the first episode and I am already in love w/ it. I love Sharon and the soccer mom chick.
I thought there was something suspicious about Paula. She really reminds me of that tough girl that was on ANTM last season... the one that tried out the year before too..?
3 of 9 | Posted by tvkitty | Posted on June 9, 2008 9:11 AM
tvkitty - you're thinking of Marvita and she totally remindes me of her too!!
I'm so happy someone is recapping this show -- and I'm really happy I didn't forget to DVR it.
I really like Sharon - she seems really genuine and full of personality and I like the French lady - she's gorgeous!
Can't wait to see what the coming episodes bring and I LOVE that Robert Verdi is a judge...he cracks me up!! :)
4 of 9 | Posted by smolls | Posted on June 9, 2008 9:51 AM
Man! I keep missing all these new shows that I might even like . . . after this frothy recap, Yenta, I think I'm hooked!!! Can't believe the bit about the multiple personality, and too funny all the Kimsicle references. From the pics, I'm not getting Hope in the mix, she's too young looking to me . . . Love me some tough looking women, like a Marvita or a Paula . . . can't wait to catch the show!
5 of 9 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on June 9, 2008 4:04 PM
tvkitty, I'll have to pay more attention to the soccermom, I'm embarrassed to admit that I kind of glossed over her in my own mind.
Smolls, we can be the I heart Robert Verdi club. I'll order t-shirts, or maybe sunglasses...: )
Juddfan, after 8 weeks of Viva Hollywood, I have high hopes born out of desperation. Let's keep our fingers crossed that this continues to be hoot.
Hugs,
Yenta
6 of 9 | Posted by yentapatrol | Posted on June 10, 2008 4:54 PM
Paula is TOTALLY marvita's mom/sister!!!
I am rooting for the French lady...I don't like the fake tan perfect Liza minelli mom....
Hope is fun and cool, but looks too young for this show!
Love Robert Verdi and Kim Alexis is a total robot!
7 of 9 | Posted by melpadgett | Posted on June 11, 2008 6:19 AM
you know kim alexis doesn't seem so bad after you watch Haylie duff be the "mentor" on the search for ell woods.
8 of 9 | Posted by intense | Posted on June 11, 2008 7:55 AM
Well, I did get to see the show on line, and super kuddos for the recap, it was like your words in pictures . . . and YES, Beverly does not move in her face, even her lips move a little crooked from uneven freezing--but she's gorgeous just the same, gotta give it up to Granny, she looks fan-f'in-tastic!!! How she kept her skin so smooth, I'll never know. Didn't like the swedish blonde, but after the scenes for next week, I'm utterly intriqued--she took up bass at 39--my kinda girl!!! Can't wait to see why she thinks she's there for comic relief . . . lastly, me kinda likey Sean Patterson--which is surprising, as those types usually curdle my milk! ( I mean the hollywood muckity-muck types)
9 of 9 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on June 11, 2008 11:38 AM