Ooh - the dance-in is with the full top twenty. They're introduced in pairs. Most of them are with their original partners from back in the day; the exception is that Martha and Ryan are suddenly together, because both of their original partners ended up in the top four without them. Unfortunately, the couples are not introduced in descending order of suckiness. Instead, they are introduced in alphabetical order by girl's name. Thus, in order, we get Aleksandra and Jason; Allison and Ivan; Ashlee (yay!) and Ben; Erin and Stanlislav; Jessica and James "Jaymz" Tuaileva; Joy and Dmitry; Martha and Ryan; and Natalie and Musa.

My observations during this sequence? Well, Aleks looks happier than she ever did when she was a contestant on this stupid show. Ashlee and Ben actually dance in sync with each other, unlike most of the couples. Erin and Stanislav - who? No, I'm not joking; I didn't start watching the show until the week after those two went home, so this is literally the first time I've ever seen them. Jessica and James "Jaymz" Tuaileva impress me a teeny little bit when she does a good impression of lifting him.

My favorite part is seeing the pairing of Joy and Dmitry, who, you may remember, hate each other's guts. He lifts her and swings her around like a ton of bricks. It could not be more awkward and graceless. Good job, guys. Oh, and I'm sure you will all be shocked to hear that Natalie shamelessly mugs for the camera. Aw - I missed her last week. The top four come out together at the end and are introduced in this order: Heidi, Benji, Donyelle, Travis. Travis is wearing those hilarious black motorcycle gloves again.

"I hate you more." "No, I hate YOU more."

That guy who doesn't do anything at all, except voice over that we should welcome Cat Deeley every episode, does his minimalist thang. Cat comes out and I get a better look at her clothes. Okay, I guess it's a dress, not a shirt. There's kind of no difference - it's a 1994-length dress (obscenely short), which would be fine, except that it's long-sleeved and, I shit you not, turtlenecked. Oh, and also a bit shapeless. What gives? Pregnancy rumors! I already mentioned the purple animal print, but let me say it again: This thing is purple. With an animal print. Also, during her entrance, she repeatedly refers to the dancers as "my babies." As in "I've missed you, my babies!" I don't think I've ever heard her sound quite that moronic before. This strikes me as something Mariah Carey would say. And before a million Mariah fans flame me into oblivion, let me clarify that I am not a Mariah-hater; I like her all right; this just strikes me as the type of thing she would say, that's all.

Cat is wearing a lot of heavy black eye makeup. It looks fine. I mean, it doesn't, but it's the least awful part of the outfit, so it's fine. She says there were 16 million votes - a new record. Great job, "America"! Cat introduces the judges, of whom there are six. SIX? Hold on a second. Why are there six judges when, for the first time, there is absolutely nothing to judge? That's got to make them feel useful.

JungleCat: all-time Hall of Shame.