Lindsey also helps to settle an debate I had with friends while watching - Are those tickets to Vegas real airline vouchers?!
FAKE TICKET! Clearly since it's a ticket for "SYTYCD Airlines" with a big "DANCE" on it. However it would be funny to be on a flight with Mary Murphy as your flight attendant. Although I'm sure that's not out of the realm of possibility one day. "Coffee, tea or HOT TAMALE!!?!? AHHHHH... kill me."
Next there's a little montage about contestants being married and/or having kids - and this guy - who has 7 kids...
And then he can't remember all of their names. Seriously?! That might be a good indication to STOP popping out kids when you can't remember their names! He can't remember 3 of them - I'm gonna guess that their names are "Oops", "Drunk" and "Broken Condom".
Next up is Nicole who has 4 kids. She runs us through her everyday job of being a super mom...
Which apparently inculdes letting her infant's head drop and bounce on the floor. Don't worry kid - I have a feeling you won't want to remember this either.
Nicole then auditions. She's a sweet girl who gives it her all. Unfortunately her "all" includes this snazzy pose:
"Come on vogue!" On second thought... please don't.
I also loved that Nicole's chosen song was "I Gotta Get Through This". Yup. That pretty much sums it up for everyone involved. However she's really nice - and the judges are kind when they send her packing.
Next up, Kelli Baker. Who was in "High School Musical"! OMG! She knows Zac Efron! EEEEEE!!!! Oy. Kelli tells us her mom is Bonnie Storey and she's "actually kind of a big deal." UGH!!!! That is quite possibly the WORST way to introduce someone EVER!!!!! There's something that makes me immediately wretch when that phrase is used. Only I, my readers and US Weekly will be the judge of who is and isn't a "big deal" thank you very much.
Oh. Bonnie won an Emmy. Sheesh. Fine. That's kind of a big deal. But Susan Lucci won an Emmy after 17 tries so it's not that big of a deal.
Kelli auditions and of course it's amazing. After her dance Nigel asks what her mom does and Kelli replies:
"She's a choreographer." With the same facetious tone of "She's kind of a big deal." UUUUGH. She choreographed "HSM" - not "Swan Lake" or a Madonna concert for shit's sake.
We finally move on to the end of the day where it's time for the "sort-of goods" to be put to the test. Zev, our hip-hopping ice-skater dude is there and actually does a pretty good job. After mind-fucking him a bit ("Would you come back next year?")- Nigel finally gives him his ticket to Vegas along with a handful of others. It looks like they're really being a lot stricter this year than in the past - which is great!
Day two starts with Naomi from Salt Lake City who's an actor, dancer and financial advisor - ooohh - triple threat! She tells us she's been in independent films.
Sweetie, films that you and your boyfriend make with a camcorder, bad lighting and a safety-word are not considered "independent films".
Naomi says that she once played a warrior during "post-apolyptical" times who "wasn't that bright." Sometimes these people just write this for me.
Naomi goes on to rock out to some heavy metal songs while dancing like a spastic Teletubby. She tells Nigel she was doing "kind of a jazz thing" and she was having "a problem with the floor". Meanwhile the floor responded by saying "F-U lady - I had all I could do to hold your dumb-warrior-ass up! PS - Cut your toenails."
Mary totally goes ape-shit on her - accusing her of wasting everyone's time. And Mandy asks if they're being punk'd. I'm pretty sure when Naomi goes home tonight she's going to a) cut herself b) add these 3 judges to her "When I finally lose it..." list and c) Advise someone to diversify their portfolio while wearing warrior make-up and a ball-gag. I'm just saying.
This segment starts a montage of the judges crushing dreams and people crying that they're giving up and pursuing "Plan B" of their lives. Which, although awful to see, is probably best for everyone involved. As my father always told me - "The world needs ditch-diggers too." As you can see - he still has his fingers crossed.
« Real Housewives of NYC: Just When You Thought You Were Over Them... | Main | A Shot At Love II With Tila Tequila: Glitter Loses Her Sparkle »
Comments (5)
I actually didn't think this episode was that good. This episode felt like it was just a showcase to show some pretty girls. Other than first girl they showed and Joshua, their was hardly any standouts.
As far as the guy with the Mickey Mouse fro, he actually didn't freak out as much as I thought he was going to. Yeah, he called out Mary, but after that he didn't really say anything, I thought they were bit hard on him. Anyway, yeah they hardly showed anything on this episode.
1 of 5 | Posted by bigjr6633 | Posted on June 2, 2008 4:33 PM
Thanks BB for catching the toddler toppling over! Classic!
2 of 5 | Posted by jglau78 | Posted on June 2, 2008 11:51 PM
My mom always told me I was a great dancer, just like Janice on the muppets, are you saying that was a bad thing? Thanks for the re-cap! For the 1st time in a long time I am looking forward to VEGAS!
3 of 5 | Posted by jewish dancer | Posted on June 3, 2008 10:11 AM
My mom always told me I was a great dancer, just like Janice on the muppets, are you saying that was a bad thing? Thanks for the re-cap! For the 1st time in a long time I am looking forward to VEGAS!
4 of 5 | Posted by jewish dancer | Posted on June 3, 2008 10:50 AM
Thanks for the recap. You nailed it pretty well.
There did seem to be a lack of talent compared to other episodes. But from what I've seen, they should have a really talented group to humiliate and choose from in Vegas.
5 of 5 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on June 3, 2008 1:57 PM