And that violin is getting louder by the second. Now we get the scene that filled me with such bemusement last week. The sobbing-in-Español scene where Mean Gay tells his mom about his "miedo" and Cheerleader strokes his hair and wipes his tears. He was wants to ganar and blah blah blah. What a baby.
Yo quiero ser macho, mama. Pero me encanta las unicornas. No puedo ayudarlo.
Oh it's good to have the gang back! Tovah Doe is tucking Italian in bed, and Italian is saying "in your faaayaaace" in his gay Euro accent. I'm loving life.
Next day in the dressing room, the world begins spinning for Loser Talk. And no, she's not just joining the rest of us, she has like vertigo or equilibrium problems or a bad case of the losery talk and can't compete. Better run off before you go on stage than during. Loser Talk runs off to the hospital leaving Mean Gay with a shit sitiuation once again. Now I'm a huge fan of our resident Cabbage Patch instructor, but I'll be the first to say that bitch needs a new shtick.
But Jer is ready with the encouragement and has his own abandoned-by-his-partner story to tell about his days of touring with West Side Story. Jer LOVES musical broadway stories.
It's just a stitch turning around to find out that your partner is offstage @#(#*$%&@ the director's @#(*%&.
Jordi's solution to this is to double up on Mochi Balls yet again. They will run the number twice. The first time Mochi will do it with Italian, second time with Mean Gay. They begin to rehearse in front of everyone and within minutes Mean Gay is accusing her of "smirking" at him. Huh? And then his reaction to the smirk is to drop her on her ass. Awkward. Everyone is watching and doesn't know what to say. Except for Italian! Italian knows machismo.
He steps right in to defend his woman. Mean Gay does NOT know how to treat a lady. He can barely find the words in English, but it makes it all the more meaningful. Come on though. Mean Gay thought he and Cheerleader had palpable sensuality when they danced. He's a little clueless. Mochi Ball finally lets loose and tells Mean Gay not to be defensive and Mean Gay gets defensive. He wants to do the routine as a soloist. And so it will be!
And it's judging time. Our panel is reintroduced and we get the announcement that Loser Talk has an inner ear inflammation and won't be able to perform. I have no idea what that means, but I'm sure it's something she got from Mean Gay's quiet intimidation to her. I bet he called her a pig carcass, too. Ah, the dream of Baby Gazelle was nice while it lasted.
So four and a half hours with Hugger and Cheerleader has grokked him entirely. She's snapping her fingers and talking like a homo and bobbing and weaving her head. Meh. Go home. Your mirrors are waiting for you in the garage.
I'll show that ottoman who's boss, too.
And let El Baile begin! The faces are muy caliente. Everyone is genuinely fighting for their life. Dare I say they are feeling "el sabor". Mean Gay sticks out without a partner pretty badly to me. Tovah Doe finally looks like she has some fire under her pants. And Mochi Ball and Italian appear to do the best in the lift and at everything else in general. Mochi Ball definitely found an extra life coin somewhere.
And now solos: Tovah and Star Cody look amazing. Tovah Doe does have some stunning gams.
Cheerleader plots extreme leg transplant surgery from the back row.
Mean Gay again looks out of place.
I don't need your music either. I'll make my own by slapping my thigh.
Straight Nick and Adriana are solid, but a bit unmemorable. Mochi Ball and Italian look amazing. Our two gays dudes reprise the lift.
Apache Two: Butch Boogaloo
As soon as the number is complete, Nomi yells that it was Caliente!! HOT HOT HOT!! She explains in case you have never heard the word "caliente" before. So immediately out come the former rejectees. And Jordi loved the returning dancers. He can't believe some of these people were eliminated. He thought Adriana gave it 1,000 percent. Vincent also thought she did a good job. Hugger was a happy dancer, but still needs to work on the technique. Jordi says that he is "joy" personified. In American we call that "flaming" personified.
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Comments (2)
Hysterically funny recap again!
I was getting worried there for a bit...where's this week's recap?
It was worth the wait, though.
Now, no more of this "having a life" stuff, okay? We have recap needs that need to be met. ;)
1 of 2 | Posted by robineau | Posted on May 23, 2008 11:01 AM
OK, Miss Sensation, we'll give you a pass this time, but note you have been demoted from Lady to Miss for now... Although if the next recap is as funny as this one AND a little earlier, I'm willing to reconsider.
Regarding Janelle's creepy talk about cutting off Tovah's legs, all I have to say is: maybe British Columbia police should be checking her out? I saw this item in my newspaper yesterday (the timing was just perfect!), and I tried to post a link, but URLs are not allowed. So Google for yourself "Fourth severed right foot found in BC". Now, of course I am not really implying that Janelle had anything to do with this, but wouldn't it go a long way towards explaining why at times she seems to be all left feet? Hmmmm...
2 of 2 | Posted by sayhuh | Posted on May 25, 2008 2:43 PM