Battle of the Hexes - 
by J-Unit
CBS has really begun to test the gullibility of the American populace. For those of you who may be confused, I am obviously referring to the first several minutes of the Survivor: Vanuatu premier. Good God, what was CBS thinking? Was there anybody out there that truly believed Jeff Probst was standing next to that smoking Volcano. Ugh. And then CBS takes us on an interesting, but completely unnecessary trip into Vanuatu culture. Although Mark Burnett would like to play it up as some land of cargo cults and ritual sacrifice, Vanuatu is still about 75% Christian. The time they used trying to convince us otherwise was time they could have used giving us a better look at these characters. I am holding this episode to the ridiculously high standards the Survivor series has set for itself, but as openers go, it could have done better.
I am skeptic in the matters of reality television, especially when it comes to Survivor. I majored in Anthropology as an undergrad, so I like to tell myself that I know a thing or two about ancient culture. I won't bore you with the details, but I sat through too many lectures with Prof. Welsch to be fooled so easily by Mark Burnett. The natives of Vanuatu were almost certainly actors. More specifically, I am pretty sure they simply found some people in Vanuatu that practiced the native religion and had them do their thing on the chosen island for the show. Not much more complicated than finding some people to do a civil war re-enactment. With all of the talk of respecting other cultures, do you actually think CBS would have their little party on an island that was actually inhabited? Adding all the elements of the opening ceremony, so to speak, pushed a lot of other things that normally fit into a sixty minute episode off the table. They should have just gone all the way with a 90 minute or two hour premier. What about the show you ask? A little rushed at times, but nonetheless enjoyable.
After canoeing on to the island, the teams were split up into women and men, but not in the traditional way. The tribe elder split them up and performed some sort of ritual on the men, asking them to drink a native concoction called Kaba[Check that - Kava, thanks Matt], and then killing a live pig so he could spread the blood on their faces. The whole point was to show how men and women were treated differently in the Vanuatu society, as compared to every other civilization where gender equality is no problem. One interesting part of this whole charade was the time when Jeff Probst offered the Lopevi tribe a chance to win a lucky rock by scaling a wooden pole coated in pig fat. Lea ducked out of the way and it was up to Brady to get the artifact. The task was supposed to be difficult because all of the men were going to be given a chance. Brady finished it with no problem, after first watching one of the island folk put sand on his hands and feet to aid their grip.
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