Before this even starts, yes...it is long. No longer than last week, though! It's just broken up differently.

I am posting before I read the recap so that this comment doesn't get lost in my lengthy replies.

Before anything, I have to say that the "have/have not" scenerio just doesn't work on this show. One team is ALWAYS exhausted while the other is ALWAYS in peak form. While it was ha-ha/nifty in episode 1, I think this concept had a shelf life of approximately one week and it has definitely expired. It isn't fair and I am already beginning to lose interest in the season.

ugh...I really hate Lisi too. GO AWAY! They should have pulled Liliana into the alliance and dumped Lisi and voted her out. Seriously, she sucks at challenges and she's extremely annoying. What does she bring to their team?

I think it would take me longer to read this recap than to watch the show.

And no funny screencaps. Just the ones from CBS.com. What's up with that? :(

Chris it's a good recap. You should read it. It's not as long as it looks and there are lots of pictures (I sound like a second grader :)

Funny comments on both Rocky and Dreamz who are both idiots. It's perfect that they take on each other! I think I'd root for Dreamz in that match up. How could you not root for the formerly homeless guy? Even if he is an idiot, naive, and has a z at the end of his name...

schoonie - awesome recap! Thorough, witty and funny!

I didn't care much for it to be broken down to 13 pages, I don't mind scrolling. You can do even more pictures than you did (esp. the first 3 pages didn't have any pictures (I don't count the first one, which was irrelevant to the text)).

And no picture of that snake losing its skin? Or was it just throwing up? That was gross yet exciting - you should have mentioned it or even linked it to youtube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZp_0wAX47Y

Other than that - I'm glad you won the recap contest!

I hate Lisi, I hate Rocky, I hate Dreamz. Glad, that there was a twist and Ravu got a break, but as TVWiliams pointed out, this luxury/poverty scenario is not working too well for this show.

yeah, that snake throwing up was so disgusting and a weird highlight of the episode!

Schoonie/site designers:
May I make a suggestion? Please make each page length longer - we are intimidated by having to click through 13 pages. Personally, I probably would end up seeing that and deciding not to read the recap. This time, however, I did go through it and see that, no, it's not that long, it's just that only a couple paragraphs of the recap are put on each page.

I MISS THE ONE PAGE RECAPS!

If we can't have those, at least make the click-throughs manageable and "unintimidating" please.

Can someone please explain how blog ad revenue works to HoosierKatie?

Thank you.

I also hate Lisi and have from the first time I saw her on CBS' Survivor Website. I don't know why but I saw her and thought "she's going to be annoying and a bitch, hope she's voted out first". I could not believe the way she was talking about Papa Smurf! I mean, come on, it's on camera- pretend to be a caring human being and not a self centered jerk. And giving up immunity? That was really dumb. And then you vote out your strongest female because the weaker ones are threatened. Alex pointed out it was stupid but didn't have the balls to go against Lisi. I hope there is a backlash against Lisi soon. I don't even want to see her make the jury.
I want to cheer for Ravu but it's getting pretty hard. Underdogs are one thing, pathetic losers are just no fun.

I understand perfectly about how blog ad revenue works - but there's got to be a happy medium.

I'm serious that if I see 13 pages, I'm likely to skip it - so you're not getting any revenue. Am I the ONLY person like that? Probably not.

I love the recaps - I'm willing to do the clicking - but 13 seems a little excessive when the content doesn't seem to warrant it.

OK, that snake upchucking that other snake or whatever the hell it was totally made me gag! That was bizarre....

I continue to HATE Lisi. What a beeotch. And I hate how she sits out of the challenges and yells at her tribemates from the sidelines. Useless. I really hope she gets voted off soon.

Poor Ravu....I thought they were gonna win the balance beam challenge. It's getting painful to watch them lose so much.

I feel sorry for Anthony! Rocky needs to shut up for 5 seconds. He's on my last nerve!

Nice recap! :)

The snake thing was VERY gross. It wasn't shedding either, because there were two different snakes! But it wasn't relevant to the plot, so I did not include it.

Schoonie~good recap..don't feel bad about Katie..you should see how she hates on LC over on the Hills page...I thought it was good. You have big shoes to fill.

Schoonie I enjoy your recaps because I don't always watch the show. I sometimes don't think they are long enough... Really though, 13 pages is not a lot to read.

I have been reading tvgasm for about two years and this is the first time I felt compelled to actually leave a comment regarding a recap. I skipped through parts of it - too long, sprinkled with too many boring details and long quotes of the survivors, which for me killed most of the entertaining elements. I read Survivor on tvgasm for the fun of it - if I want the story I'll simply go to cbs. Maybe I'm comparing to B-Side's recaps; still, if the length and structure do not change, I admit I won't read them anymore.
PS - some comments are way funnier than the recap itself

I've never skipped a recap before due to length, but I've skipped this one and gone straight to the comments.

I'll throw in my own comment, to jump on the bandwagon, that 13 pages is just ridiculous. But I'm not blaming Schoonie: It's not necessarily that the overall length of the article is so bad, but I just cannot stand to click through that many times to read anything -- on this site or on any other site.

I have a lot of blogs that I follow, and all the click-throughs on TVGasm just lengthen the amount of time I have to dedicate to this one single site. I've said it before (in the forums) and I'll say it again that it's disrespectful to the readership to continue to make us jump through hoops in order to read TVgasm's blogs. Not only that, it's arrogant to think that we love the site so much that we'll just take it and not complain.

For those of us who DO like the site but DON'T like the page-breaking annoyances that generate ad revenue, how about TVGasm looking into a membership model for those who want it, while leaving the site free for those who want to click through? The example I'm thinking of can be seen at daringfireball.net. From their membership page:

"It is essential to note that Daring Fireball is and will remain a free web site. New articles and the complete archive are available to all, free of charge. This is a good thing. However, paying supporters do get access to a few members-only perquisites, including a full-content RSS feed, and a feed for the Linked List, my daily list of links and blurbs related to Mac, web, and design nerdery. (The regular (free) Daring Fireball RSS feed contains only headlines and brief synopses.)"

Give us, your consumers, the choice of model we'd like to follow -- ad-based or membership -- and mabye, just maybe, you'll be able to stop alienating your most faithful readers.

God, I hate Lisi too. Another thing I hate about her besides everything already mentioned in the recap: her legs. She has that weird leg thing where her legs branch out strangely. I can't explain it, but do you know what I mean? Anyone? She was so obviously jealous of Liliana getting "man time." Her Mexican explanation made no sense.

I have to say though, I'm feeling pretty indifferent about this season so far. Maybe I was spoiled by the awesomeness of last season. Do love me some Earl though.

Oh, also, about recap length: it has never bothered me because the pages don't take any time to load. An example where it does bother me would be bravo.com. it takes forever to load each page for any of their blogs, and there is literally one picture and comment per page. That's annoying. But 13 clicks on quick-loading pages? who cares?

Geez Mikey...That is the longest comment EVER! Get over it. If your can't concentrate that long don't read it....or if your life is SO busy.

I did like the recap. And the length did not bother me.

As someone else mentioned, this season is rather boring. But I think its due to the tribes. All very boring. Nobody stands out to me, as someone I can root for to win. The losing tribe, just grates on my nerves. I would not mind seeing the entire tribe being voted off in one episode.
I miss having an Ozzy, Terry or even a Rupert around. This season, lacks anyone with the drive, or commitment to stir things up, the use of any kind of manipulation to keep me tuning in week after week.

Schoonie, Hilarious recap (and not overly long). I share you hatred of Poopy Lisi.

Fycin (#18), I didn't notice Lisi's legs, but could she possibly be knock-kneed?

great recap Schoonie! All 13 pages of it!:)

I hate Lisi too and I think that their decision to choose comfort over immunity will haunt them b/c it showed how their tribe is splintered. Karma is a bitch- so is Lisi- and Moto will be going down next week ( I hope).

Am I allowed to comment drunk? Anyway, too bad. Fuckin' Lisi sucks. Also, Moto sucks. They were dumb to choose their camp. Next week I'm writing in Morse Code, just so everyone knows. I want things to be as long as possible. Have a good night!

Rocky looked like a transvestite hooker in that pink top. And he had perky nipples, heh.

Schoonie,
I thought you were funny before because,you know, I know you. But you reached new heights in this recap with the part about Boo and the parasol, and getting the vapors, and wearing a hoop skirt. I laughed out loud at my computer, kinda like a crazy person.

Wonderfully done. Due to your efficiency, I am reading you before Miss Ali and I can't imagine she'll do better!

On a personal note, I commend your good-natured responses to the complaints about the length. I, on the other hand, wish literate people would stop complaining. It's not like an evil government scientist is holding a syringe to our jugulars and forcing us to read the recaps. To read a well-written recap of such length is my choice, and my delight, by the way.

Good recap Schoonie.
To the folks upset about the complaining- Is the irony completely lost on you that you are complaining about complaining? And here I am complaining about the complaing about the complaining. How fun!

Very funny recap Schoonie. I agree that if I'm entertained (and I am), I don't care about the length of the recap. It's laughable to see people complaining about having to push their index finger down about 3 millimeters on a mouse a few times. I've been enjoying this website just about every day for almost two years and it hasn't cost me a cent. B-Side and J-Unit have a right to make a living.

Don't cry, Schoonie. Not everyone's gonna love your recaps. Constructive criticism is a-okay. Besides, most of us are in love with B-Side and no one can compare anyways. Don't get so defensive...

You're kidding, right? The morse code thing was a joke to mock the haters (dusts shoulders off), as is the concept that everyone does not love me. Everyone does! Just ask...anyone!

When J-Unit and B-Side were running the show, we had one page recaps. JasonR, it's not J and B that are making the money...it's their bosses. If those guys were making the money, I would click away but not for some giant corporation. I'm not clicking through 13 pages.
I'll just read the comments. Sorry Schoonie.

No, I'm not kidding. I know what the point of your "joke" was. Just sayin you seem to be very sensitive that people don't like to read 13 page recaps. And for me, it's not the length that bothers me, they just get boring. And for everyone who's gonna tell me not to read them, I do cause I just keep hoping they're gonna get better...maybe.

I am sensitive. My feelings, they are crushed!

I can't believe that everyone is too busy commenting on the length of the recap to comment on the most stupid move on Survivor ever - who gives up immunity for comfort? I mean, it's a NUMBERS game, people.

As for all of you complaining about the length of the recap - have you ever heard of skimming? Isn't that how everyone gets through college? No, really, it's not that long, and there were some very funny parts. I especially think it's funny that schoonie makes fun of Dreamz for being homeless and not knowing proper English, and then slams Lisi for doing the EXACT SAME THING.

It's true! Lisi took advantage of a cultural rift that existed between the two of them, and that was particularly crude of her, I thought. It's not an issue that his grammar is off (although it is easy to mock, and thus I do it), but it is an issue when Lisi takes advantage of it to make herself feel better and to look cooler in the eyes of the others. Hate her!

Can't you break the comments section into about 8 pages instead of just one?

fabulous recap schoonie!

i can't stand Lisi. seriously, she is pretty much useless, but she is calling the shots--wtf? did everyone forget how long it took her to get across that beam? i just don't get it.

i hope that giving up immunity--after losing papa smurf to illness--comes back and bites them in the butt. especially since they got rid of Lilliana instead of ms. useless.

JasonR, JUnit has "retired." Perhaps because he got sick of ppl complaining about the page breaks and he couldn't do anything about it?

13 pages, way too long. 2 to 4 is my limit. I still miss the Show All option.

When I see multiple pages, my first thought is always "Show more advertising" (which I don't see anyway...).

I don't read TVGasm much anymore and never full articles. Just too annoying to navigate anymore.

awesome recap!! very funny!!
and idiots please stop complaining about the length please!!!!!! nobody is forcing you to read 13 pages or 1 for that matter...
god I hate whiners!

#38---What do you mean J-Unit has retired?? Really? I had no idea, has he moved on to bigger and better things?

There are so many new writers now, that it is difficult to keep track of the originals. I guess if I visited the forums once in a while then maybe I would have known that J-Unit was no longer around. That`s too bad...I will miss his funny recaps!

Hey, check it out, it's only 11 page now! That's going to save an entire two clicks for you guys, meaning that you can safely take the IVs out of your arms from all of the dehydration you are experiencing from the excessive clicking. Ravu has nothing on you guys.