Coach almost immediately starts talking game with JT, whose excited to have an opportunity to save his hide. JT points out that the consensus is that Brendan believes that he's in charge, lying (I think) that Taj told him this based on her visits to Exile Island. He also says that he's pretty sure Brendan has the idol. Coach asks JT whether he thinks Taj has it, and JT lies terrible when he gets all "I don't know if she's got it or not" on Coach. When you spend 18 days with a total of three other people, you should have a fairly good idea whether or not one of them has the idol. If you don't want Coach to discover your hidden alliance with Taj, don't tell him you "don't know". That would make a normal person suspicious, I think. Luckily, Coach thinks that he's got JT sized up, and since he believes that JT is too dumb to lie to him, he doesn't catch the obvious red flag. ""If she does [have the idol], there's two idols," JT says, having no idea just how right he is. I'm not sure what information JT has, but I'm pretty sure that he might be trying to throw Coach of the trail and is instead unintentionally placing him on another, also correct trail, which is an interesting series of mistakes that, through sheer luck, turn out to be blessings for JT. Of course, he also doesn't know how badly he's screwing up Taj right now and leaving her with JT as her only option as well, so I think he's sort of unintentionally making a lot of very shrewd moves in this scene. He's essentially tripping and falling face first into a pot of gold here.
Coach gets all hush-hush with JT, asking him to "keep things confidential" and tell no one about this conversation. "It's hard to keep six people together when they hate each other," JT says very astutely, "and I'm here to make these people hate each other." He's no dummy, this guy. Coach seems to think that Brendan has lied to him repeatedly (which we've never seen), and is angry about this fact. "If you flat out lie to me, you'd better be prepared to go to war," he says in confessional. I think he's mad that Brendan has hidden the fact that he has the idol from him, but not telling someone something and lying are actually two entirely different things. How is Brendan not telling Coach that he has the idol and different than Coach not telling Candace that he's going to vote her out? He is a complete hypocrite, of course, but why waste time trying to make sense of him? I have dishes to do.
Coach tells Tyson that he talked to JT about an alliance and discovered that Brendan has the idol. As a result, he wants to enter into an alliance with Stephen and Brendan. Tyson wants to add Debbie, which will allow them to go to the end and then create a Tyson, Coach and Debbie final three. "It's time to go to the jugular," Coach says. "Brendan is the head of the dragon, and I want to cut it off." Why is Brendan the "head of the dragon"? Is there some sort of alliance involving Brendan that Coach knows of that I do not? Yeah, he has the idol, but he doesn't appear to be any sort of power player. If anything, he's well meaning, slightly dull and under the radar. This has more to do with the fact that Coach is threatened by him than any sort of proverbial dragon slaying. Tyson takes this proposal to Stephen, and al of a sudden, JT and Stephen are in a really great position, thanks mostly to Coach's insecurity.
On the morning of Day 20, JT and Tyson do some fishing. JT talks about how he expected not to get along with Tyson, since they trash talked each other at almost every challenge, but they seem to get along well and work together easily. Tyson is also in favor of eliminating Brendan from the game. "He just seems like a sneaky bastard," Tyson says. What has Brendan done that's so sneaky? I don't understand.
« Hell's Kitchen: Yakety Yak. Don't Talk Back. | Main | Real World Brooklyn Reunion »
Comments (27)
The thought of anything 'F' with Taj makes me want to 'P'.
I thought Coach was saying 'lawyer' at first, then I thought he was saying 'worrier'. Finally, I understood that he was in fact saying 'wuhyer' and I felt much better.
Something more interesting than Joe (at least, within the Survivor Tocantins universe):
The true meaning of Coach's tattoos.
1 of 27 | Posted by itchy | Posted on April 12, 2009 11:15 PM
More interesting than Joe?
Tyson's sexual history?
Watching the paint dry on the new "Forza" sign?
The financial statements of Brendan's latest corporation?
The contents of Deb's brain?
Jeff Probst's life philosophy?
2 of 27 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on April 13, 2009 12:29 AM
Oooo, one more:
The color beige?
3 of 27 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on April 13, 2009 12:30 AM
Does that mean Taj likes "farting" and the "Fonz"? Just wondering.
Coach kept saying how smart he was, but it seemed to me that other people were coming up with the good ideas.
4 of 27 | Posted by ReeseWitherspoon | Posted on April 13, 2009 12:33 AM
More interesting than Joe? SWV's many contributions to society?
Congrats, Schoonie on your milestone. Thanks for the laughs, and for your suffering!
I hate Coach.
5 of 27 | Posted by briar | Posted on April 13, 2009 3:19 AM
Things more interesting than Joe:
A South Korean sweet potato salesman
A jelly jar half full of Canadian change
Angela Lansbury's stamp collection
A dead tadpole on the bank of a stream in Arkansas
A rubix cube with 4 missing stickers
What do I win?
6 of 27 | Posted by behbojo | Posted on April 13, 2009 6:03 AM
I kept wondering during the challenge why Tyson removed his shoes and no one else did that I saw. Of course he's going to win the challenge because his toes gripped the pole better than shoes can. Did Probst ask if anyone else wanted to remove their shoes before they started?
7 of 27 | Posted by LisaMay | Posted on April 13, 2009 6:39 AM
Didn't they say the cast was going to be more likable this season? I would like to drown everyone of these morons in the Amazon.
Forza is Italian for "strength." Coach probably got it from watching the Italian soccer team play -- their motto is "Forza Azzurri." "Força" is the Portuguese word for strength. Not that Coach would care that Italian and Portuguese are different languages. Or from different countries. Of course, he probably invented Portuguese and Portugal has been spelling their word wrong all these many years because Coach is never wrong. Wanker.
I kept hoping for one of those little candiru fishes that swim up men's urine streams into their penises would get him during one of his Samurai meditative moments. That would be classic! I pretty sure this is wrong of me to hope for, but this guy is a first class arsehole. He invented the Samurai thing? Where is the penis fish when you need it?
8 of 27 | Posted by jennaboa | Posted on April 13, 2009 6:57 AM
More interesting than Joe?
Definitely the penis fish jennaboa just mentioned.
9 of 27 | Posted by southern_essence | Posted on April 13, 2009 7:05 AM
Penis fish is more interesting than Coach, too. :)
More interesting than Joe: Watching grass grow. In the Sahara.
10 of 27 | Posted by jennaboa | Posted on April 13, 2009 7:29 AM
This is about as interesting as Joe, but here it goes: the actual Portuegese word for "will to overcome" is dingus (pronounced din-goose,) not "vignus." And it would have been funny to hear Jeff mispronounce it at challenges just to make fun of them.
I am now also rooting for the candiru fish...maybe we should make T-shirts.
11 of 27 | Posted by cattyfan | Posted on April 13, 2009 7:50 AM
Also, is it me, or are Tyson's legs unusually short? (see the "trade pants" picture.)
12 of 27 | Posted by cattyfan | Posted on April 13, 2009 7:55 AM
Schoonie -
I have to join the chorus for "penis fish" as more interesting than Joe!
And congradulations on 100 recaps.
I have to add one more Coach=douche moment. After JT and Tyson (Schoonie - in the recap, you had the conversation between JT and Brendan) talked about Brendan's potential use of the idol, it was JT who came up with the "split the vote" scenario.
After Tyson told Coach about it - suddenly it was Coach's "brilliant plan."
God, I hope the penis fish get him!
13 of 27 | Posted by channel dasher | Posted on April 13, 2009 8:45 AM
Congrats Schoonie!
More interesting than Joe: Watching Lisi fall.
14 of 27 | Posted by Clair | Posted on April 13, 2009 9:15 AM
More interesting than Joe: watching my cat shed.
15 of 27 | Posted by cattyfan | Posted on April 13, 2009 10:19 AM
cattyfan: I don't think I have ever noticed Tyson's legs; I'm usually too busy counting his ribs. He seems to be incredibly ribby.
I would buy a Team Candiru tee-shirt. Força, candiru!
Also more interesting than Joe: Counting Tyson's ribs.
16 of 27 | Posted by jennaboa | Posted on April 13, 2009 11:38 AM
In response to your question, “What has Brendan done?” The answer is nothing. Tyson and Coach are simply backstabbing, insecure bitches.
Brendan=dreamboat
Tyson=sideshow freak
Brendan’s butthole is, I’m sure, more attractive than Tyson’s face. Tyson is ugly. Oh, and if Tyson and Coach had big dicks they wouldn’t be so jealous of Brendan.
Regarding Joe, uh, he’s the male version of Sydney.
You know I like Coach being on the show because he always makes me laugh and I always feel superior.
17 of 27 | Posted by Mr Dangerous | Posted on April 13, 2009 11:46 AM
Mr Dangerous: I totally agree with you. Brendan is absolutely hot and I'm glad the previews showing him back with his secret alliance.
Tyson is unbelievably dangerous and these people better start thinking about what a challenger he is. It would make sense to get rid of him before Coach. Who in the jury would vote for Coach to win?
Debra needs to go too--way too under the radar and a personality that rivals Joe.
I say Taj or Brendan FTW.
18 of 27 | Posted by bluzgirl | Posted on April 13, 2009 12:01 PM
Nice recap
speaking of real world road rules challenge, is anyone recaping it? I've been looking for you guys to put up a recap
more interesting than Joe:(I have a mix of boring ones and actually not boring)
Sydney
watching sierra hit her face on the pole
Schoonie=way more interesting
waiting an hour and a half to load a 2 minute american idol performance...dang dial-up
re-watching the entire season just to count Sierra's wardrobe malfunctions with that tiny striped dress, if you can call it that...not that I have done this, but it would be very boring plus think of how much non-stop coach that would be
19 of 27 | Posted by tv freak | Posted on April 13, 2009 1:02 PM
More interesting than Joe: Watching Joe's own nut hair grow!
20 of 27 | Posted by ReeseWitherspoon | Posted on April 13, 2009 3:53 PM
more interesting than Joe? This recap and these comments (seriously, people: hilarious)
also more interesting than Joe:
- my use of punctuation
- the AIG congressional hearings
- Ace of Bass
- schoonie's dirty dishes
- school bus rodeos
- toe jam
Congrats on the big 100, schoonie! xoxo
21 of 27 | Posted by here4beer | Posted on April 13, 2009 9:01 PM
Congrats on hitting the century mark Schoonie.
More interesting than Joe: Joe's puss.
22 of 27 | Posted by JasonR | Posted on April 14, 2009 7:34 AM
That should have been "pus." If Joe actually had a puss that would make him interesting.
23 of 27 | Posted by JasonR | Posted on April 14, 2009 7:35 AM
Just a quick thought...since pretty much EVERYTHING in this world is more interesting than Joe, shouldn't the contest have been to find something LESS interesting than Joe?
That certainly narrows the field down considerably, doesn't it?
In which case, I resubmit the meaning behind Coach's tattoos idea.
The substance of which probably holds as much "truth" as the candiru fish myth. And the telling of which could be bottled and sold as a non-addictive sleep aid.
It would make much more sense that the fish would go after Coach's vagina, anyway. You just know he has one. Probably invented them.
24 of 27 | Posted by itchy | Posted on April 14, 2009 8:46 AM
LOVED the editing at the beginning with the mega-dramatic music and lightning to Coach's regrouping his thoughts. Does he realize what a douche people think he is?
I totally agree with your head of the dragon comments. He's soooo full of shit! And, Tyson. He is one nasty dude. He's the cancer in the tribe if anyone is. Getting rid of his ass would be the ultimate blindside!!
Speaking of Coach's tats...did anyone see Propst's recap on the EW site? He says they look too crisp and new and speculates whether Coach had them done specifically for the show. Leave it to that douche!
25 of 27 | Posted by 2muchbravo | Posted on April 14, 2009 9:27 AM
Hey Schoon, congrats on the 100th!!!! That makes you old school here, eh!
Had to comment, I'm not really watching, and it's a bit hard to follow, so I don't want to bore y'all with my lack of a clue, but I had to say, that penis fish thing, fucking funny, funny, funny!!!!! I can't stop snickering . . . go Jennaboa!!!!
Personally, I think Probst calling Coach a douche is more boring than Joe . . . and I don't even know Joe . . .
26 of 27 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on April 14, 2009 4:19 PM
I'm going to give this a shot. More interesting than Joe:
*Kanye West's "808s And Heartbreak"
*Meredith Vieria's Jokes Planted Into Option D On The $100 Question
*My trip to Disney World at Age 16
*"The Moment of Truth"
*"I Love Money"
*The first 5 episodes of "Pirate Master"
*The first 2 episodes of 50 Cent's reality show
*"Big Brother 9"
*Disney Channel
*Boy bands
*Def Leppard
*Poison
*"The Strangers"
*Vinyl Records
*VHS tapes
*Plane Trigonometry lectures
*Rascal Flatts
*Canada
*K-Fed
*"The Apprentice"
*ABC Family
*Power Rangers
*Emo bands
*MTV reality shows
*CNBC
*Waits in a doctor's office
27 of 27 | Posted by nerrawllehctim | Posted on April 15, 2009 9:08 PM