Over at Airai, the favorites are like, "Wow, what a shithole." Seriously. How have I not noticed that they've been living in squalor this whole time? I mean, even for Survivor it's pretty terrible. They start cooking their reward food as the tide sneaks up on them. Of course, the tide goes in and out over the course of a lunar cycle, so this may just be turning into a problem. However, it's still pretty dumb to build your shelter that close to the water. While they're cooking, the tide actually runs up on the fire and almost manages to steal their food away. James, of course, takes this opportunity to whine about how terrible everyone is. "I'm surprised their not dead!" he says. Why, without you around, what would they do? I am sorry, but he is an ass. There it is, I said it. He's had two chances from me, the gong has sounded.
Jonathan's knee actually appears to be pretty bad, and the Survivor medical team comes in and basically stitches it up, right there on camera. We get really gross, close up shots of his knee being sown up, and it is disgusting. I am glossing over this because it is gross, but I will say that I hope Jon's knee gets better, because he is awesome and seeing him go out like that would be unfortunate.
Over at Malakal, Ozzy is out in the water with Joel and Erik, and talk turns to the game. Erik tells us that "it was like two superpowers discussing terms". Um, NO. You want superpowers? Talk to Cirie. And maybe Tracy. Just because someone is big and strong doesn't automatically make them the leader, or the decision maker. The three of them agree that Chet should probably go. Joel is thinking in terms of Fans v. Favorites still, so he wants a Favorite to go next (Cirie, probably), so that the numbers are back to even. That's dumb. Why the hell would Ozzy give up a lead like that? Throughout the whole segment (and really, thoughout this whole season), Joel makes smug faces like he's the one who has the final decision. HATE!
Over at Airai, jaunty music plays while the tribe builds a new shelter. That's...pretty much the whole segment. Wow, easy! At Malakal, Amanda comes around the corner with a GIANT shark. Like, five feet in length. From the sound of it, it was caught in some kind of trap and died; however, I would not put it past Amanda to have wrestled it until one emerged the victor. I mean, she's pretty competitive and intense. Ozzy tells us that the catching of the shark is "pretty hot to a guy like me." Yeah, you know who we should hook up Ozzy with? Grizzly Adams. Their kids would have such pretty hair!
Immunity Challenge! Today four people will throw rocks at tiles, which will release some puzzle pieces. Three other people will move the puzzle pieces into place while a final person sits up on a perch and gives them direction. Basically, it is a team activity. The throwing part begins, and Malakal pulls out in the lead pretty quickly thanks to Tracy absolutely dominating the rock throwing. Joel, it is worth noting, does not break a single tile, contributing nothing. Jonathan actually hits tiles about every time, but he manages to sort of half break them so they don't completely fall. On the third time this happens, Jonathan screams "MY ASS!" quite hilariously. Malakal begins working to put their puzzle together, with Chet on the perch giving people directions. He appears to be doing a pretty good job, but Joel keeps butting in with "helpful" "suggestions", basically completely undermining Chet and confusing the shit out of the people working the puzzle. This allows Eliza time to look at the pieces, see the big picture (with the help of Jonathan) and direct the rest of the tribe members until the puzzle's completion. So, thanks to JOEL, Airai wins immunity and Malakal must attend Tribal Council.
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Comments (13)
Chet: "I hit my head back there."
Joel: "I don't care."
Chet: "I know."
Seriously, has there ever been such a brilliant exchange in so few words on this show?
1 of 13 | Posted by abaumga2 | Posted on March 13, 2008 7:19 PM
The best part was during his after-auf'ing confessional, when he whines that he cannot believe his former tribemates chose Chet over him.
Kinda like Mikey the week before, eh, Joel? You putz?
What a complete tool.
2 of 13 | Posted by Memememe | Posted on March 13, 2008 11:22 PM
The pecking order how Chet described it is pretty accurate. I don't know anything about farming or animals, but we had to do a case in business school about -- no joke -- contact lenses for chickens. They were these lenses that obscured the vision of chickens in egg farms so that they couldn't see the other chickens well enough. The reason this had to be done was that the natural pecking-order process caused the deaths of chickens in the flock -- which cut into profits. By keeping alpha chickens from being able to identify and kill the weak ones, the egg farm would have increased production.
Contact lenses for chickens... Who knew?!
3 of 13 | Posted by mishajames | Posted on March 14, 2008 3:56 AM
One of the best episodes in a long time! Poetic justice rules! ;)
These challenges are getting more and more dangerous--does anyone else agree? I still can't get over the one where they had to tackle each other in the mud a few weeks back--no fair to put someone like Joel against Yao or Eliza, as the smaller folks could have really gotten hurt.
Anyway, thanks for the recap--I got a kick out of your gleeful replay of the James/Jason/tree comedy routine!
4 of 13 | Posted by drmalcolm | Posted on March 14, 2008 6:33 AM
As Stewie Griffin would say: "Spot on, spot on".
Great recap!
5 of 13 | Posted by TALMA63 | Posted on March 14, 2008 11:33 AM
As Stewie Griffin would say: "Spot on, spot on". Great recap!
6 of 13 | Posted by talma63 | Posted on March 14, 2008 11:35 AM
Like I said last week, I really did almost start crying during that reward challenge. Watching Chet get dragged around and hit his head was so hard to watch. and then the pitiful "I hit my head back there." Oh god...it kills me just thinking about it.
I detest Joel. When you throw around scenarios, even hypothetical ones, more than once, that involve actually killing people....yeah, you have issues.
Overall though, I am not liking this season, and I am very rarely one to judge a season this early. All the "favorites" (except Jonathan) are annoying me to no end, and the fans (except Tracy) are pretty much pointless as well. Erik is starting to really grate on my nerves. That hair!!!
7 of 13 | Posted by fycin | Posted on March 14, 2008 12:15 PM
Wonderful recap! However, I think on the last page, Joel was blaming Chet after the Immunity Challenge, not Tribal Council.
Jeff "sniffs his [Joel's] asshole torch?" Best typo EVER!
I wonder what they will say about Joel when it's time for the ceremonial burning of the torches, or whatever, when they remember the "fallen" players. I hope they don't try to act like he was awesome and say nice things.
8 of 13 | Posted by LonnaSaur | Posted on March 14, 2008 12:50 PM
I felt so bad for Chet!! Joel is such a despicable douchebag, I loved that he got voted out!! It was one of, if not THE best moment in Survivor history for me! Hated that guy!!!!
9 of 13 | Posted by jojobear | Posted on March 14, 2008 4:35 PM
Mongo like Joel
Mongo find Joel hunky.
Mongo ashamed of Chet.
Mongo don't like gay people depicted as weak and sniveling.
Mongo not big fan of Chet.
Mongo want Joel back.
10 of 13 | Posted by weasel dearest | Posted on March 14, 2008 4:55 PM
On dial-up here, so just getting ready to enjoy the recap.
Before I start, I am going to ask if anyone else shed a tear for Jonathan. My god, he broke my shriveled heart.
And I can't stand that one, what's her name? - Tracey - the one with Chet. She has had so much control in this game, and good on her, but there is a mean streak there.
Now off to read.
11 of 13 | Posted by FuriousFlipper | Posted on March 14, 2008 5:08 PM
I agree with your suggestion that there was ill-will towards Joel about how he treated Chet during the Challenge. It was actually very upsetting to see Joel treat Chet with such disregard.
Isn't this guy a fireman or something?
His disrespect towards Chet as a human being was shocking and disgusting.
12 of 13 | Posted by BellicoseBaby | Posted on March 14, 2008 6:32 PM
I happen to think James is awesome at challenges and around camp. He has admitted that he doesn't communicate well and/or socializes well with others. He makes me laugh when he makes comments like "They should be dead." I think it is his way of trying to be funny. Anyway, it makes me laugh. Also, I don't know why you think Jonathon is so great - his voice is grating and he is so whiny. I will admit his eyes are beautiful but I don't get the love of all things Jonathon. I can't wait until Tracy is gone as well. It's great to have an alliance but Chet was completely USELESS!!
13 of 13 | Posted by sunshine | Posted on March 15, 2008 6:33 PM