This week, on Survivor: Girlfight!
It's Night 3 at Jalapao. With their newly acquired flint, the tribe attempts to start a fire. Well, everyone except Sandy, who is sitting and watching, helpful as she is. "Carolina played her cards terribly wrong," says Sandy, who could not have played her cards worse if she were Topher Grace in Ocean's Eleven. ("FLUSH! Allllllllllll red.") "I think I'm underestimated," she continues, falling back to that old reality show standby of pretending to be underestimated when you are, in fact, adequately estimated.
After the credits, we're at Jalapao again. Joe talks about how they've been eating vegetables for days, and that he wants a little protein. They get the idea to go find a termite round and have themselves a little bug buffet, and they wander off to kick one over. It is as disgusting as you would think it is, particularly when they find some sort of giant worm inside the mound and we get a spectacularly disgusting close up. Thanks, HD television! The Chinese takeout I was eating the first time I watched this episode was mighty tasty during this scene.
Over at Timbira, Sierra still looks run down as hell. She talks about how she still needs to find the immunity idol to save her own ass. "I need someone to help me, though," she says without really letting any of us know why. She grabs Brendan (citing the fact that he didn't vote for her at the very beginning) and tells him everything while he looks on interestingly. Brendan helps her dig for the clue, and since they're having a bit of trouble finding it, they end up with a giant pit out on the beach. Debra decides to go check on them, and when she wanders onto the scene, Sierra covers beautifully by telling Debra that they're working to build a fire pit. Debra swallows it hook, line and sinker, and she heads back to the beach singing the praises of Brendan and Sierra. "Ooh, we can have a beach party!" she gushes hilariously while everyone else in the tribe looks on awkwardly, since, you know, there's actual work that could be done instead of the digging of a fire pit. I'd be all, "Thanks for the fire pit. Now how 'bout we go find some freaking food? Jerks."
Candace and some other Timbira members talk about food that they wish they were eating, which is always helpful. Candace goes on at length about how she wants to steam a fish in its own juices, citing specific spices and fruit. "I bet we could find most of that stuff," Tyson says. Candace's face lights up. "Really?" she says. Tyson, without missing a beat: "No, absolutely not. I just lied straight to your face." Alright, Tyson. You win. Your offbeat, Mormon humor has swayed me.
Coach and Candace argue about cooking the rice and beans. Coach tells us that Candace has a personality like his, in that she can be very assertive and tell other people what to do. "I do it because it's my job, she does it because its her nature," he says. Yes, I am sure that the only reason you're a pushy, elistist jerk is because you're a coach; I bet you'd be Mahatma Ghandi otherwise. Ass.
"Normally, I'd go off and him and talk about how he's overcompensating, but since we're here, I just walked away. He'll apologize," Candace says. And apologize he does, in the absolute creepiest way possible, by telling her that he wants to kiss her and then attempting to lick her face. Who does he think he is, Joe Namath?
Back at Jalapao, the tribe members are settling into their misery, complaining about how dirty everything is. JT uses the adjective "smutty", which seems inappropriate, but whatever. Everyone makes small talk, and Taj tries to offhandedly mention to everyone that her husband is Eddie George. For those of you who are not football fans (like Stephen, who has no idea who he is), this is a huge deal. There is no simple way to mention to people that you're married to Eddie George without having them make a big deal out of it, so I'm not sure why she even tried. JT says the inevitable, which is that he probably needs the million dollars more than Taj does. Man, just wait until they find out about the SWV thing! I bet it will make them so weak in the knees.
Okay, that's the last time, I promise.
« Damages: New York Sucks | Main | I Love Money 2: The Quitting Game »
Comments (12)
Schoonie, SWV did have more than one hit ya know.
Just for variety's sake:
Right Here (Human Nature remix)
Downtown
You're Always On My Mind
Can We
Anything
I'm So Into You
and more...
1 of 12 | Posted by BlahBlah | Posted on February 23, 2009 4:43 AM
My husband refers to Coach as Cooch... so funny! He also pronounces Tocantins as Token Cheese. :P
I agree that this season has a lot of promise and I love the switch up for Exile island. Of course, switching tribes is kind of a double edged sword. If you switch to get away from a tribe that hates you, you might be seen as being disloyal to your tribe or an outsider and get voted off first in your new tribe. Or seen as a spy, maybe. That would only work if you were able to have some allies on the other tribe methinks. I think that will come into play if they do a switcheroo pre-merge like they did last season.
Thanks for the great recap, Schoon!
2 of 12 | Posted by Snootchy Bootches | Posted on February 23, 2009 4:54 AM
Just finished watching the show and reading the recap...
I'm glad Candice is gone. She annoyed me the entire episode. Kinda the woman version of Coach without the alpha-maleness so beloved on this show.
I don't have a fav to win yet (besides my girl Taj of but I doubt she'll make it to the end with her rich, semi-famous self).
Is Sierra this season's more likable Sugar??
I agree with you that this season has more promise than last season even though I found it really entertaining with all the back2back blindsides.
Sandy needs to go soon. I hope she doesn't pull a Susie on us and fly all the way under the radar till the end.
3 of 12 | Posted by BlahBlah | Posted on February 23, 2009 5:38 AM
Schoonie! When you mentioned Lisi falling, I was just sure we would get a video of the event! Good times . . .
4 of 12 | Posted by kdfinjpn | Posted on February 23, 2009 6:03 AM
"Mad Shadiness And Also Some Camping"
hahaha... priceless!
5 of 12 | Posted by here4beer | Posted on February 23, 2009 7:13 AM
Probst has a blog on ew.com, he shares that being in the rain and being wet is a big turn on to him. Just imagine how excited he must have been during that challenge, it was pouring rain, he was soaking wet, there was girl on girl and boy on boy action. There are supposed to be a lot of challenges in the rain, I'm going to be watching for Probst wood.
6 of 12 | Posted by Quean CeCe | Posted on February 23, 2009 10:09 AM
I would say Sandy's performance in the challenge was the best she could do. As a woman in her mid-50s, she probably wasn't going to be much help in making baskets or doing straight-up tackling like Taj, so just immobilizing one of the stronger people was a good idea for her.
Come to think of it, I think she's the only "old woman" typecast who's made it to the traditional "tackle the shit out of each other" challenge without sitting out, so props to her for getting involved.
I am looking forward to Coach being a male version of Lisi (they both even have mullets!) At least, that's what it looks like it's working out to be, seeing as they both had power early on but were just progressively shown in a more ridiculous light.
The problem with some of the recent seasons is the fact that people like Crystal and Sugar and Corinne, though heinous, aren't really shown with the humor and irony that they deserve, whereas Lisi and the Four Horsemen in Fiji were (which is why that's really the last truly awesome season I can recall).
Maybe this season will be a step in the right direction. No one is outright boring me like Jacquie or Susie or Natalie, so that's good. If I were ever a contestant on this show, I would much rather have a Lisi edit than a Susie edit. Better to be an entertaining tool than a forgettable nice person.
7 of 12 | Posted by User Name | Posted on February 23, 2009 10:21 AM
That last post was my comment. Don't know why it didn't take my name.
8 of 12 | Posted by pretty good year | Posted on February 23, 2009 10:22 AM
I kept waiting for Sierra to pipe up and defend herself -- sure, she didn't make the hike, but she spent all of her time building the shelter for everyone else, and she was sick while doing it....but no. She just seems deflated.
None of the others are really sticking out that much for me (other than Hootie's boobs), other than possibly the Bromance. Nice that the geeky Jewish guy pulled off the win.
Can't wait until Coach gets shamed. What an asshat.
9 of 12 | Posted by itchy | Posted on February 23, 2009 10:33 AM
Quean CeCe LOL "Probst wood" Great recap Schoon. I liked when Taj stiff armed Candace (hee-hee). You didn't mention about when they forcefully held Sierra underwater until she coughed up the ball. I thought we might have our first Survivor manslaughter case! And Cooch (thanks Snootchy Bootches) ! Where do they get them? Do they keep a rolodex titled "Douche Applicants"? I didn't even remember Debra? from the first week but she's really unlikable. Why was Taj so handsy with Brendan? Did anyone else notice that? I don't know if Sierra is really a quitter or is just to worn out with the strep throat and drowning and all. I don't think Candace deserved to go though. What happened to having both a reward challenge and an immunity challenge? This reminds me of last season on Amazing Race when their pit stops weren't luxury hotels but instead were mowed grass islands in the center of intersections. Did Bernie Madoff get CBS' money too?
10 of 12 | Posted by soapboxx | Posted on February 23, 2009 11:48 AM
we're totally kindred spirits. i was eating italian take out during the whole worm fiasco and i said out loud in real time, "who is this guy?! joe namath?!" LOVE it! great recap.
11 of 12 | Posted by baymenxpac | Posted on February 23, 2009 12:49 PM
With "Boom. Roasted!" last week and "Hootie McBoob"
this week, I'm starting to look for all of your tv references like a hawk.
I also laughed out loud at the Mad Shadiness and Also Some Camping line. Priceless.
12 of 12 | Posted by leslie_pcc | Posted on February 23, 2009 5:46 PM