It's the final week on THAT'S AMORE, and we have quite a prizefight. In one corner, there's Kim, "The Insecure Egomaniac" Martin and in the other, Megan "Ms. Opportunity" Mirilovich (thanks Wikipedia for giving us their last names. Now we can go online and check if any of the contestants are sexual predators). Kim's beatdowns are psychological, as she berates people to death, obsesses over her non-existent greatness, and overall bothers people with her Planet of the Apes face. Megan's skills revolve around trickery - you'll barely notice her as she quietly, sneakily makes you so used to having her around, you convince yourself you actually enjoy spending time with her. But, before you know it, she's bored you to death. All of this, from Acquardo, Italy!

So, gasmii - you ready to rumble?

Posted by HayHor at 11:04 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Any of you out there ever been to Italy? Because I haven't, and it makes me wonder, are there rednecks in Italy? I mean let's be honest, there ARE rednecks globally. I know this because my family is not from the continental United States and yet, there are some members that love Wal-Mart, wear shirts with no sleeves, and voted for Dubya. So, with that in mind (and considering Dom has a competition to win his heart by having the ladies race some go karts around the house), let's go hand in hand to the front yard, lie in a kiddie pool, cook some burgers on an old tire, and find out what happened on this week's THAT'S AMORE!

You girls into Rascal Flatts?

Posted by HayHor at 12:09 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)

Hey there THAT'S AMORE! lovers. Can you believe it's only week 4 and we're already down to 5 girls?! We've got two brunettes and three blondes left, so Domenico has done a nice job giving himself some variety. In fact, tensions were so high between the blondes and brunettes that at one point, a challenge had to be created seperating each into teams. Christina became a casualty of war during that challenge for nearly slicing open her shocker finger with a cheese grater. Ever since then she's been ready to pop off Tanisha-style, and Kathleen, prayers unanswered by Jesus, looks to be her first victim.

Consider it God's revenge for using your vagina as a handiwipe last week.

Posted by HayHor at 12:04 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)

Hi there Gasmii. You know, with the recent festivities around St. Patrick, the patron saint of beer, I was thinking, what saints we would find this week on THAT'S AMORE!? Luckily, we have a house chock full of them, starting with,Kathleen, the patron saint of fake virgins, Rebecca, the patron saint of obnoxious hoes, and Missy, the patron saint of bitches who just like to break shit. Oh, and let us not forget Ashley, the patron saint of hoes who love steroids (sorry Debbie Clemens).

Love me Domenico, or I will destroy you!

Posted by HayHor at 10:06 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Last week on THAT'S AMORE, Domenico learned that blondes and brunettes don't like each other and that Kathleen has "not had sexytime." He for some reason didn't learn that Kim is a succubus hosebeast, but I guess it's hard to see past those plastic shot glass holders. Nonetheless, it's a new week, so maybe Dom will see the light and decide to hit Kim and quit Kim. OR maybe that's been his plan all along. Even if he doesn't exactly come across as lucid.

What's Italian for "wake and bake?"

Posted by HayHor at 10:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Hi there Gasmii. I'm HayHor and I'm here to welcome you to a bizzare study in walking talking stereotypes, what raging whores will do when cameras are rolling, and what happens when cokeheads run MTV's programming department. Other subjects will include Biology (the phermones of a stinky ho), Sociology (the conflicts between passive girls and agressive girls), Psychology (mostly due to a glut of psychotic hoes), and last but not least, the chemistry of Domenico Nesci. So what are you waiting for? Let's get dumber at the University of That's Amore!

One part Cousin Balki, one part Roberto Benigni, one part Queer Eye for the Straight Guy's Thom Filicia, and one part every guy in Daytona Beach spring break circa 1994 = every woman's fantasy

Posted by HayHor at 1:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)