Now before you call me lame —  er, actually, you probably did that already, didn't you? Well, now that you have called me lame, I'll explain. Saturday night was one of those random walk out the door, run into half a dozen reality star nights. You know what I'm talking about, right? No? Hmmm... Well, maybe I'll just have to clarify.

A few of my friends and I wanted to go out on Saturday, but we weren't exactly sure what we wanted. Lacking any sort of creativity, we simply meandered up to the Sunset Strip in hopes of excitement and/or trashy people watching. Our first stop was The Standard lounge. There we ran into Big Brother 5 stars Drew (and his twin, Ben) and Scott — who happily informed us that he was so wasted he couldn't see straight. All right. Not bad. A little reality flavor to kick off the night. When we grew bored of the scene, we headed over to Chi — a miserable little spot whose only claim to fame is having Justin Timberlake as one of its investors. As we walked down the street towards the bar, we couldn't help but notice a big, stocky guy in front of the famed Saddle Ranch Chop House. Indeed, it was Bolo from The Amazing Race 6. Turns out our favorite wrestling reality star now earns his keep as security for the bridge-and-tunnel bar. Sadly, he apparently wasn't good enough to be the bar's mechanical bull operator like John from Survivor Vanuatu or Blair from Road Rules. I guess Bolo didn't match the "pasty white guy" job description.

The reality parade continued once we finally arrived at Chi as David from Real World: Los Angeles made a fleeting appearance. You may remember David from such controversies as getting spat on by Puck and rape. Even the most anti-reality member of my group had to admit this was getting a little crazy. Anyway, things at Chi were less than fascinating, and when the color coordinated couple next to us crossed the PDA line, we knew it was time to jet. Where to next? We decided it was time to stop the experimentation and just go to Boa, a highly frequented TVgasm spot.

Unfortunately, Boa had a little line outside and according to the bouncer, only people on the guest list could get in. WELL. It just so happens that we go to Boa all the time, and we weren't going to let a small technicality like a "bouncer" or a "list" or "God" get in our way. Luckily, there's a side door to the bar; so my clan went around, and as I mentally prepared to smooth talk our way in, Jordan Knight — late of New Kids on the Block and The Surreal Life — appeared out of nowhere and began talking to the bouncer at the side entrance.