Tonight on The Shitty: Jay tells Whit about his upcoming tour, which has bad repercussions; Whit completely outshines Olivia at a presentation. That's it. Just two little plots this week.
I'm gonna miss that balcony.
Ugh, you guys, I'm so sorry about the lateness. Life threw me some lemons, and instead of making lemonade, I let them hit me in the face, and that citric acid burns like a mofo. Next week's will be up earls, I swear. Let's get goin'!
This is totally me right now.
At the Angelika movie theater, which totally doesn't look like I thought it would, Jay and Adam stand in the lobby, eating popcorn. I'm assuming they're there for the Truffaut retrospective, because I'm sure Adam is a huge fan. Truffaut, il est incroyable! Jay's ready for Tamarama lama ding dong to go on tour, but he hasn't told Whit about it yet. He wants it to work with her, but he's on tour, and he wants "to be focused." By the way, thatswhatshesaid? Your joke? "There's an old joke that goes, "What do you call a musician without a girlfriend?" Answer: Homeless."? H-I-to-the-LARious! Adam says that girls will be throwing panties at Jay and if he's going on tour he needs to be a single dude or with someone who sticks by him. Well, yeah. Because those are pretty much everyone's only two relationship options. Thanks, Adam. You are truly a sage.
You know what helps get me through the credits? Cocaine, yes, but also muting my computer when the credits play. "I'm Sorry Whit." That's today's title. And you know who definitely won't say that, like, ever? Olivia. We're at DVF, where Alixe, whom I'm calling Betsy for the rest of this recap and show, by the way, talks about fashion week. Did anyone see that fashion show where the models wore dead Muppets? It was really sad and disturbing. And no one wore the Swedish Chef, which would have been awesome.
PR teams are arriving, and it's time for them to give their "strategy" to them. Strategies like, "The models put on clothes backstage, and then they walk on the runway." Tough! Emese (I spelled it wrong last week), whom I'm calling Missy for the rest of this recap and show, by the way, is there too. Olivia straightened her hair, and I have to say, she looks really nice like that. Maybe we could just have a picture of her in the corner of the screen instead of her actually being on the show? Just a suggestion. Also, I wonder what's up with Nevan? Whit's in charge of handbags and explaining them. Like, "These are bags that you hold in your hand. Or there's a strap for your shoulder." Tough! Olivia's in charge of the handbag press or editorial or something. They have to give presentations. Whit and the other co-worker, Elizabeth (where the hell did she come from?) are unsure about it, but of course Olivia exudes (probably fake) confidence about the whole thing.
Ugh, Tamarama lama ding dong is rehearsing when Jay tells them to "take foive." Pottsy (ugh) and Jay talk about their girlfriends and touring and staying focused. Except when it comes to harmonizing. Seriously, I'd go see them if they just played their instruments and no one sang. And if you paid for it.
Over at Felix restaurant, Whit sits alone, waiting for Jay, like she always does. Jay drinks a whiskey on the rocks in like .5 nanoseconds, and then says he has to talk to Whit. Jay tells her about the tour, but in a way that makes it seem like it was this all-of-a-sudden thing, all, I got a call, and basically they want us to go on tour for a long time. Then Whit asks him how long he's known, and he says, "Before Miami." What a stupid Vegemite head! The background noise is REALLY loud, and I hope someone got fired for that.
But who'll make me cry?
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Comments (12)
I couldn't believe he pulled out the alligator ears. So lame!
I actually saw Jay and his idiotic band on E! News tonight.
1 of 12 | Posted by nicevibe | Posted on March 13, 2009 6:51 PM
*tears. Lame alligator tears.
(Alligator EARS would have ruled.)
2 of 12 | Posted by nicevibe | Posted on March 13, 2009 6:54 PM
Great job Hypnotoad! Good to see you haven't lost your humor in the midst of your trials and tribulations! Sorry about all the lemons, but this is a recession; SELL THOSE LEMONS! Just kidding! Hope things get better! I can't believe next week is the last ep either. Jay was lame and he used her for free publicity. At least Whitney never came off looking like a punk.
3 of 12 | Posted by thatswhatshesaid | Posted on March 13, 2009 10:06 PM
I rather liked the Bernie Madoff comment. I mean, the topics aren't the same, sure, but I always appreciate a little current events humor.
And...oh Jay, just when I am trying to like you because no one else really does, you act lame for the second episode in a row. Ah well.
Oh, and because I remember reading comments a few episodes back about how Olivia needs love in her life: I was reading Us Weekly or In Touch and there was a thing about Olivia's "secret" love (because he doesn't want to be on the show) and he is rather attractive. So I guess Olivia DOES have a boyfriend and that he is kind of like LC's boyfriend and doesn't want to be on the show. But I really think he just doesn't want the world to know he's actually dating her.
4 of 12 | Posted by kelsey | Posted on March 13, 2009 11:57 PM
Erin's earrings are awesome! I'd sit in a casino anytime! At least she isn't trying to look like everyone else on the show...it shows she's more of an individual than beige & boring.
5 of 12 | Posted by Anonymous | Posted on March 14, 2009 3:05 PM
i wish you liked girls, cause i have such a crush on you!
6 of 12 | Posted by alliewooo | Posted on March 14, 2009 6:13 PM
Kelsey, maybe that is why Olivia decided she couldn't have Nevan sleeping on her couch. I hope the new BF "takes care" of her Nevan problem for her.
7 of 12 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on March 14, 2009 7:27 PM
Ok, if Jay was living with Whit, is his stuff still in her apartment. You never saw him getting it. How is he brushing his teeth? And you know he's not going to leave his hair product there.
8 of 12 | Posted by southerntippi | Posted on March 15, 2009 5:35 PM
southerntippi: LOL! You are sho right! We've seen what his hair looks like on his "off days". I think that whole "Sorry Whit" walk-out was staged. I really bet he'd just leave like that if he cared. It felt staged to me....
9 of 12 | Posted by thatswhatshesaid | Posted on March 15, 2009 8:14 PM
Hypnotoad, when life throws you lemons, ask for some Patron and salt! :)
Anywho, I admired Whit this episode... maybe it was staged, maybe not, but it was nice to see her standing up for herself! My biggest pet peeve is seeing girls (and okay, sometimes guys too) get walked all over and forget to stand up for themselves!
My fave part of the whole episode was Olivia (trying!) to give her presentation...much of it didn't make sense, she stuttered often, and must have said 'um' a half dozen times... FAIL! :) (I don't normally take so much pleasure in other people's failures but she is shady and she took credit for Whit's work a few weeks ago... karma...)
10 of 12 | Posted by kara | Posted on March 16, 2009 11:28 AM
I guess I'm confused. According to the entertainment news, Whitney and Jay are still, as of today, a couple. I'd like to think she dumped his sorry ass for good, but methinks it's only temporary...
11 of 12 | Posted by olderandwiser | Posted on March 16, 2009 12:22 PM
Love the recaps Hypnotoad and the comments--i apologize if i'm repeating an existing conversational strain i missed but thought this was worth a (re)mention...
i watched The City finale this week instead of just reading the recaps. I couldn't help but notice that DVF fully cribbed Sex and the City. I am ashamed to admit but knew that a DVF quote sounded like Carrie Bradshaw so looked it up to find that "Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous."
Isn't the second to last line about the most important relationship being the one you have with yourself exactly what DVF said to Whit???
12 of 12 | Posted by ace2008 | Posted on March 16, 2009 8:53 PM