Whitney recaps basically what happened on The Hills, in her last episode over there. I don't write those recaps; the lovely O. Snapp does. So read that funniness if you missed it. Whitney says a lot of things about "living the dream" and "big city" and "completely fake job." Okay, I actually said that last one.

She introduces the characters, like "the Downtown Girl - Erin." Billy Joel will never write a song about her. I'm sure she's grateful for that. "Erin likes guys, like lots of guys." Wow, what a really backhanded thing to say, Whitney. Lo would be so proud!

Why are you smiling? You were just called a whore on national television.

Then there's the Downtown Guys, like Adam, "a model who does whatever he wants, whenever he wants." Then we see a picture of Adam's girlfriend crying (it's like a preview of later in the season). Jerk! Then there's the Uptown Crowd, like Olivia (Palermo, famous for . . . you know, wearing big sunglasses and buying crap like Berkin Bags). She calls herself a "social," short for "socialite," and then Whitney says this really mean and awesome thing: "She lives in her own exclusive world and isn't afraid to remind you that you are not, nor ever will be, a part of it." That's not even a backhanded compliment. That's pretty much backhand. And I love it!

Then there's this "guy" she's "dating:" Jay. Now, many of you over at The Hills recaps think he's attractive. I, however, do not. There. I said it, and now we can move on. He's Australian and in a band. Blah blah new life fitting in blah blah . . . The City.

Well, at least you'll never have to wonder who left the blow dryer on the sink.

"Top of the World" by . . . *sigh* . . . The Pussycat Dolls is the theme song. Oh, how I wish it were the Carpenter's "Top of the World!" But no. It is the completely vocoded voices of The Pussycat Dolls. Are they cyborgs? They sure sound like it. And act like it.

Title of this ep: "If She Can Make It Here . . ." Will she make it here? MTV says yes. Whit arrives at Diane Von Furstenberg at the Meat Packing District, which, according to Sex and the City, began gentrification in about 2003. Whitney meets Emese, a p.r. person. Whitney starts her new job on fashion week, then she's introduced to someone who clearly does not want her there, and we're told Olivia is on her way. Okay, when Olivia enters the building, she says "Good morning" to everyone, and it sounds like she's never ever said good morning to them before. in her life

Who was she talking to? asks the front desk lady.

Whitney and Olivia introduce themselves to each other on what I think is probably the 5th or 6th take of this scene. It's soooo not convincing. They talk about Fashion Week and Olivia's fab lifestyle, including a dinner for "close friends." She doesn't invite Whitney. Hee. Then it's off to the staff meeting!

Uh ok then have fun!! Is it my braids?

What seems like dozens of women and girls walk by in couture clothes on their way to the meeting. Did I pop in a copy of "The Women" by mistake? Ah, no. Thank god. That movie was sub-par and I'd much rather be watching . . . this . . . show . . . Um, anyway, someone named Alixe is in charge of the meeting. How much you wanna bet her name was Betsy when she lived in Nebraska, before severing ties with all friends and moving to NYC? Christmas: "I told you to call me Alixe, mom, not Betsy! Sheesh!" You guys, this is an important week at DVF. No, it's not because of the large amounts of layoffs the company's issuing, silly! (Seriously - Wikipedia.) It's because of important things, like fashion! And their new co-worker Whitney!

Nice to meet you, skank.

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Posted in The City by Hypnotoad at 9:30 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)
Last Comment: J-Mo on Jan 5, 2009 12:24 PM.