Tonight on The City: Erin and her Canadian boyfriend move to a new level (emotionally); Whitney moves to a new level (physically); Olivia and Nevan sink to new levels (evilly). And Jay and Whitney try to define their relationship.
I don't have another word ending in ly so just enjoy this pic of Olivia dressed like Kirsten Dunst in Interview with a Vampire.
We open at Erin's apartment, where her boyfriend (?) is playing a guitar. Her boyfriend (?) looks like Zac Efron will in, like, 5 years, when he's able to grow facial hair. The dude is teaching Erin some guitar chords, and it's very sweet. I think they may be stoned.
Let's write a song about marshmallows.
Third Wheel Whitney comes in and Erin introduces her to Duncan from Toronto. Erin and Duncan talk about getting a movie, Erin suggests "Titanic" and then "The Sound of Music," because she can't believe he hasn't seen it. Whitney's looking around like she feels really awkward, but honestly? Why? They're not talking about maybe trying anal sex tonight, they're talking about "The Sound of Music." She has nothing to say about it? What about, "My sister and I used to play 'The Sound of Music' when we were kids, and I always wanted to be Liesl!" Ah, wait. That was me. I don't get why she's got a puss on. Whitney's all, I'm gonna go run errands and stuff, let me know if I get in the way.
Credits. I hate the way everyone poses for the camera. Especially Olivia. It's as if she's saying, "Holy crap, America, I am so much better than you it's not even funny," with her eyes.
It hurts to even stand still long enough to get my picture taken for your damn poor people with no lives of your own.
Tonight's episode is called "The L Word." Licorice? Laxative? Labia? We'll never know. Did they tape this in the fall? It looks like fall. Whit and Erin eat breakfast (indoors!) at a really cool cafe, and discuss Whitney's hunt for apartments. Whit says it's been "really hard" to find a place. Translation: "The place MTV bought for me isn't quite ready yet." How are things with Jay? Erin inquires. Whitney doesn't know where they stand and she's analyzing and questioning everything.
Over at DVF, some skinny girl is getting her picture taken before she breaks for a lunch of Kleenex and Perrier. Olivia asks about how things are with Erin. What? You don't care about Jay today? Speaking of Jay, he calls and says he has an apartment to show Whitney. I swear to god, if they move in together, I'm handing over these recaps to someone else. That will be my limit. My limit! But she has to hurry, Jay says.
Olivia, openly hearing this, is all, well, why don't you wait until you have more time and we can sit down and discuss cool places to live. Oh, such a succubus, that Olivia! Whitney says she'll just wait until this shoot is over and go take a look. And you guys, like literally 3 seconds after she says that, Alixe comes over, thanks them for a job well done, and the shoot is over. Olivia literally has one hairstyle. And you know what? Mischa Barton would totally play her in a movie of her life. And no one would go see it.
I hear the Bronx is greeeeeat.
Jay and Whitney look at a really nice apartment, very high above the city, with a kick-ass little balcony. I'm guessing she's on the 20th, 25th floor maybe? I live on the 7th floor of my building and it's definitely way higher than mine. The realtor says something about the market, which she probably knows nothing about since she's an actor MTV hired for the day, and gives Whitney a couple seconds to think about it. Jay tells her she'd be a couple blocks from Erin and she and Jay will be close, so she takes it. Olivia will frown when she hears the news that Whitney's not moving to the Upper East Side. Olivia frowns a lot.
This place is totally affordable! I'll take it!
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Comments (25)
I just cant get into this show.... I am assuming the L Word was 'love', but I have assumed stuff before. I cant tolerate Olivia, she sounds like Heidi and even looks somewhat like her with the long skinny face.
1 of 25 | Posted by fatgirlsrule | Posted on January 7, 2009 7:02 PM
I like the show alright...I think it's better than The Hills if nothing more than because Whitney is a bit more tolerable than Lauren. It's still early, I hope it gets more interesting...
The scenes with Olivia are more contrived than anything I've seen on reality tv...I can't stand how she sits around talking about Whitney. WEIRDO!
2 of 25 | Posted by dani2526 | Posted on January 7, 2009 7:15 PM
I like this show so far. It is true to form with its "scripted reality" but there are actual genuine moments. Google "ny mag run for the hills" for a great article that pretty much nails the show and the cast.
Plus NYC is the greatest place on earth!!
3 of 25 | Posted by trister | Posted on January 7, 2009 9:45 PM
Hypnotoad, the way you described it, Jay went out of his way to give his opinion on saying you love someone. If somebody told me that she and her bf had exchanged ILYs, I wouldn't say anything negative about it.
Of course I'm a woman and a lot older than these kids. I am way over that type of behavior.
I am amazed to hear that Nevan spits. Well, I'd believe he might spit venom, like those venomous toads. Maybe that's why he looks different. This is post-spitting Nevan.
4 of 25 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on January 7, 2009 11:16 PM
Don't get me wrong, I loved the Hills but I watched this show for 5 minutes and had to turn it off. It's not that I don't like Whitney, because I do but she is just so damn boring(k).
5 of 25 | Posted by Yanksfan24 | Posted on January 8, 2009 5:06 AM
I actually like this show better than the Hills. At least the Hills the way it has been since Spencer has been on it. I feel like nothing happens on the Hills. The City makes me want to be in NY city and go out to the clubs, restaurants, etc... It's a great advertisement for tourism! Whitney is also showing more personality and spunk than she used to. I also read an article about Olivia (I googled her) that said when this blog was out in 2006 that rated socialites, she hired a PR firm to help with her image. It was a guy from the People's Republic!! Why would Kelly Cutrone bash an old client? For more drama or I wonder if they parted ways not on good terms?
6 of 25 | Posted by sunshine | Posted on January 8, 2009 7:23 AM
Sorry one more thing...per Eonline...seems that Nevan has a warrant out for his arrest in FL! He was soliciting a prostitute!
7 of 25 | Posted by Yanksfan24 | Posted on January 8, 2009 7:53 AM
Like everyone else, I do hate Olivia very much. However, I think that what Alixe said was that the shoot was over, and she would see them upstairs in a few minutes or something like that. It did seem like just the photo shoot was over and not the day; I was surprised that Whitney ducked out early too, even before Olivia re-hashed it with that horrible guy.
Anyways, this show is super boring to me - I just can't care about Whitney and Jay, and there is not much shit-stirring. olivia sucks at that too.
8 of 25 | Posted by DP Hooker | Posted on January 8, 2009 8:07 AM
"What the eff? It's an apartment, not an adopted Chinese girl. "
hahaha, too funny.
9 of 25 | Posted by pixyamiga | Posted on January 8, 2009 8:12 AM
Jay sent up a red flag for me this ep, what this is anti-bf,gf talk. It reeked of eau de Justin Bobby (although for Whitney's sake, hopefully not literally). Remember that conversation that Justin had with Audrina (for any of you who watch the Hills - and I think it was season 3) where he was blah blah blahing and talking out of his ass about labels and crap? That is what this reminded me of and (sadly, because he's cute and Australian, if a bit too scruffy for my taste) I fear that Jay and Justin Bobby are not too different...
Intriguing.
10 of 25 | Posted by georgiababe | Posted on January 8, 2009 8:28 AM
My sentiments exactly, Georgiababe. Though unlike JB, Jay is just some media whore looking for publicity. He dated Miranda Kerr previously and he's in a band. Of course his band needs more exposure and since Whitney already has hills fame, he figures that if he can sling her, he'll be famous too.
I'm also wondering if anyone is going to cover Bromance? I want to do that show.
11 of 25 | Posted by kissmymanolos | Posted on January 8, 2009 9:08 AM
Can I just say that your recaps are great, but I got a little tingly when you said you lived in Chicago. Could you please recap a day riding on the CTA - that would be a brilliant little recap. Riding Chicago Public Transit is the best reality show in the whole entire world!
12 of 25 | Posted by chigirl | Posted on January 8, 2009 9:46 AM
Did anyone else notice how Mr. Blahnik didn't act like Olivia was an old family friend? Me thinks she has built that little relationship up just a little. Also, I laughed out loud at your recap - so funny!!!
Great job!!
13 of 25 | Posted by sunshine | Posted on January 8, 2009 10:43 AM
olivia is a big freakin weirdo. and nevan is kind of like her lap dog. and jay is a publicity whore. i like whitney though. she's got a good head on her shoulders. grrreat recap!
14 of 25 | Posted by efk2020 | Posted on January 8, 2009 10:55 AM
This was hilarious. Loved the comment about the two Darrins. Outing myself as a nerd here, but Nevan reminds me of Barty Crouch Jr, the dude in Harry Potter 4 who impersonates one of the real teachers. He has this tic where he constantly creepily licks his lips, it just seems sooo Nevan.
I found Olivia's comments on work ethic interesting. Hi pot, it's kettle. Clearly this chick has never worked a day in her life, and is only doing so now for some D-level MTV fame.
Erin seems like the most real person on the show.
Oh! The chick in profile in the screencap that was eavesdropping on Olivia and Whit? Did she remind anyone else of Elodie? How great would that be? I'd love to see Elodie return to give Olivia a verbal beating.
15 of 25 | Posted by msu11y28 | Posted on January 8, 2009 11:21 AM
Have I mentioned how happy I am that this show is being recapped? Yes? Oh. Yea, I'm happy about that.
Anyway, I'm watching online and I finally figured out what's wrong with Olivia. During eps 1 & 2, I thought it was that she's a bad actress or uncomfortable in front of the camera. But at the 17 minute mark I realized SHE'S SOULLESS. Seriously. There's nothing in or behind those eyes. And it was clear to me after her pretentious cousins says "No knows how hard New York more than you..." or something like that. The look on her face just screams DAMAGED!!
I hope Whitney's smart enough to never take O's advice.
Also, I don't see anything wrong with Jay so far. He seems like a regular dude who doesn't want an insta-relationship.
16 of 25 | Posted by BlahBlah | Posted on January 8, 2009 1:34 PM
Have I mentioned how happy I am that this show is being recapped? Yes? Oh. Yea, I'm happy about that.
Anyway, I'm watching online and I finally figured out what's wrong with Olivia. During eps 1 & 2, I thought it was that she's a bad actress or uncomfortable in front of the camera. But at the 17 minute mark I realized SHE'S SOULLESS. Seriously. There's nothing in or behind those eyes. And it was clear to me after her pretentious cousins says "No knows how hard New York more than you..." or something like that. The look on her face just screams DAMAGED!!
I hope Whitney's smart enough to never take O's advice.
Also, I don't see anything wrong with Jay so far. He seems like a regular dude who doesn't want an insta-relationship. Whitney should start dating other people along with Jay, though. He's positioning himself to have his cake and eat it, too. "Let's be exclusive but not define it so I can still feel free."
Oh, just saw the previews. Yep, that's my girl. >Love Whitney. Do you, girl.
17 of 25 | Posted by BlahBlah | Posted on January 8, 2009 1:40 PM
Yeah, Nevan has a warrant out for his arrest in Florida because he failed to complete the terms of his probation for soliciting a prostitute. Man, not only does he spit, but...
Like I said, as soon as little JayB started off with his bf/gf talk, he'd have been history. But then I'm not in my 20s. Whit may not want commitment any more than he does.
18 of 25 | Posted by Pixielated | Posted on January 8, 2009 2:18 PM
Have I mentioned how happy I am that this show is being recapped? Yes? Oh. Yea, I'm happy about that.
Anyway, I'm watching online and I finally figured out what's wrong with Olivia. During eps 1 & 2, I thought it was that she's a bad actress or uncomfortable in front of the camera. But at the 17 minute mark I realized SHE'S SOULLESS. Seriously. There's nothing in or behind those eyes. And it was clear to me after her pretentious cousins says "No knows how hard New York more than you..." or something like that. The look on her face just screams DAMAGED!!
I hope Whitney's smart enough to never take O's advice.
Also, I don't see anything wrong with Jay so far. He seems like a regular dude who doesn't want an insta-relationship.
19 of 25 | Posted by BlahBlah | Posted on January 8, 2009 2:34 PM
The opening credits are just like America's Next Top Model when they turn to the camera and pose before they actually know how to model.
I think Nevan looks like an odd hybrid of Mario Cantone and Paul Rudd.
20 of 25 | Posted by leenie | Posted on January 8, 2009 2:37 PM
Oops, sorry about multi-posting. That's so annoying.
21 of 25 | Posted by BlahBlah | Posted on January 8, 2009 2:49 PM
Awkwardly? Clumsily? Ridiculously?
Their trying to define their relationship, any of the above words could work. Why do people insist on classifying things too soon?!
22 of 25 | Posted by kara | Posted on January 9, 2009 7:44 AM
This episode was so boring. Immediately after I watched it I thought, "What happpened?"
I thought Jay was right on point about getting to know Whitney before calling her his girlfriend. After all, she's the one who decided to sleep with him on the first night and every night that she saw him. That doesn't necessarily mean you both are on the same page about where things are going. Often times it's the OPPOSITE...A girl who gives it up immediately with no hesitation doesn't scream "keeper!" to most guys. But anyhoo, this is television so Whitney gets to be tormented over his ambivalence towards her.
Meanwhile, we meet Erin's boyfriend(!). What happened to her "liking boys A LOT" and not taking anything too seriously? They are alread saying "I love you"?! Seems like a contradiction to me! I guess we'll see how committed she'll stay since it's a long-distance relationship. Maybe we'll get to see some great phone fights a la Montana and Vaj (or really, almost any dysfunctional couple) from The Real World as the season progresses.
I think we've established that Olivia is crazy. "She didn't do what I said!!!" Psycho. Whitney is not your child or protoge, Olivia. Jeez. If it weren't for Whitney, Olivia wouldn't even be on television....
23 of 25 | Posted by Thatswhatshesaid | Posted on January 11, 2009 7:10 AM
I wish there were recaps of Jon and Kate plus 8. Mom is psycho, so the re-caps would be hillarious
24 of 25 | Posted by fatgirlsrule | Posted on January 11, 2009 4:03 PM
I wish there were recaps of Jon and Kate plus 8. Mom is psycho, so the re-caps would be hillarious
25 of 25 | Posted by fatgirlsrule | Posted on January 11, 2009 4:03 PM