Okay...so I'm a jackass. I thought that this was the last episode because they went to Vegas and there were only three guys left. It didn't happen that way and now I am a little concerned for my mental well-being and the fate of this country. This week, Stacey takes the remaining three guys to Vegas because that's where all good decisions are made. The show doesn't waste anytime. We immediately go to a racetrack in Parhump, NV where Stacey will have her first Vegas date. The producers couldn't have found a more apropos location for this activity.
Jimmy jumps out of the limo and Stacey jumps on him like he's a 23 year old bodybuilder and she's a 40 year old woman desperately trying to recapture the years she lost to her two age-appropriate, yet stifling, husbands and four kids. I realize now that Jimmy reminds me of Puddy from Seinfeld who always had that serious, furrowed eyebrow look but is actually a ditz. Stacey and Jimmy race cars and it looks like tons of fun. Then Stacey tries to get all philosophical. She says that racing cars is like her relationship with Jimmy. They're moving fast, it's lots of fun and it could end up in a crash.
Stacey beats Jimmy in the car race and either the producers set it up that way, Jimmy let her win or there are two pussies on this show. Jimmy is 23 and a personal trainer. He lost to Pillsbury Jon in the wine barrel-rolling contest and now he lost to Stacey too. I wouldn't feel comfortable having a wimp like that train ME at the gym. Later, Jimmy and Stacey head to the high rollers club at a casino and Jimmy is hooting and hollering like an addict getting his fix. He tells Stacey to double down on her hand and- he's right. She got 21 and won some much needed cash! According to Stacey's ex-husband who gave an interview on the Insider, Stacey is not a millionaire, was living in a one bedroom apartment before the show started and doesn't have custody of those four lovely kids. Their marriage also ended due to alcohol and substance abuse issues that Stacey supposedly has. She always has a drink around but most reality show stars do, right?
Right...Anydrunk, Jimmy and Stacey leave the casino to have a romantic dinner and guess who shows up?
As the conversation evolves, and I use that word very lightly, we discover that Jimmy's last girlfriend didn't just move away. She moved away to do a movie. He can't say for sure if they would have broken up if she would have stayed at home and Stacey knows that this could be trouble. She asks how he knows that he likes her and he says that it's because she gives him butterflies. I suppose nausea could be a relationship litmus test. Stacey takes Jimmy up to her suite and he starts pouring his heart out to her. She cuts him off and says that he needs to let his guard down and so does she. FYI, what Stacey really means is-
And yes, Stacey is chugging down yet another drink. Just because she's double the drinking age doesn't mean she needs to start and finish off every bottle. Jimmy caps off the evening by throwing Stacey onto a pool table and doing all sorts of nasty things.
The next day, Stacey has a date with "I'm not Gay" Travis. He shows up in a vest, button down shirt and jeans. Stacey promptly informs Travis that he is overdressed.
« Charm School: It's All About the Wordplay | Main | I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here! »
Comments (10)
Vivica FTW! Because everyone else on this show is a loser. Including me for watching it. I mean, LB, at least you do it for the large paycheck that Flipit gives you, right? Right?
Colt is still my fave (has been since the first episode) because he is the one I would probably go for. But my money is on the other guy to win. Whasshisname? Jimmy? Yeah him.
1 of 10 | Posted by Snootchy Bootches | Posted on June 2, 2009 10:00 AM
Your funny recap helps me further enjoy not watching.
While all these guys may seem like losers, I think whoever is left standing at the end has reason to claim the title (or at least co-title with the Cougar)..
2 of 10 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on June 2, 2009 10:15 AM
LOL – Bowl of Fire – LOL!!! I tried to watch the first episode, honest…but decided to save my shame for something less painful, like anything else on TV, ever. Still, I’m glad you pointed out the stupid black dresses. Yawn, Cougar. I was almost interested in seeing which scenes her nose looked the most red and shiny, but then a black and white episode of The Andy Griffith Show came on and I looked away.
L Boogie, damn fine recaps, though! You are a true humanitarian. Now instead of wasting important time at home on or around the couch, I can waste time where I truly should. At work, reading awesome summaries – yay!
3 of 10 | Posted by teambethany | Posted on June 2, 2009 1:20 PM
L boogie, you should recap I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Outta Here! (I know I make a suggestion every week about what you should recap, but really, I'm just trying to keep hope alive for you. Keep hope alive!!)
4 of 10 | Posted by here4beer | Posted on June 2, 2009 1:38 PM
Lboogie, I'm not watching, but I saw part of one epi, and came on here to see who was top three . . . after a scan of the caps and the pool cue, I was laughing like a little girl with gum drops!
Then I had to read.
One reason I can't watch this is I feel really bad for the cougar . . . and now with the ex's comments, I really feel bad for her, and coz she kept the girly one with swooping bangs . . . even worse!
But a lovely light read and I covet your Vivica blow up doll!!!!
Best to you!
5 of 10 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on June 2, 2009 2:05 PM
Yeah, I'm on fire@will's couch...don't think I could bear watching this one.
But the recaps are a hoot!
6 of 10 | Posted by itchy | Posted on June 2, 2009 2:35 PM
I had to LOL at swooping bangs. I knew I couldn't be the only one to see how ridiculous Colt's hair looks. Thanks for reading!
7 of 10 | Posted by L Boogie
|
Posted on June 5, 2009 7:18 AM
here4beer:
You got your wish! I'll be recapping I'm a Celebrity...in rotation with Cherie and Medusa. Woo hoo!
8 of 10 | Posted by L Boogie
|
Posted on June 5, 2009 7:21 AM
I'll gladly suffer through this for you. BTW, I think Stacey pulled out a navy blue (whoa!!) dress for the finale.
9 of 10 | Posted by L Boogie
|
Posted on June 5, 2009 7:23 AM
snooty bootches:
My large paycheck helped me to NOT pay my cable bill this month! Thank God these episodes replay online :-).
10 of 10 | Posted by L Boogie
|
Posted on June 5, 2009 7:26 AM