The crew toasts to Blahdrina moving out of LC's place and Spencer is so pleased that he gets all yenta on them and asks when Blah and Pigpen will be moving in together. All five of them look down at Pigpen, who's sitting (when no one else is) and looking not entirely involved in the socializing, what with his hood up and all. He kind of shakes his head. Spencer gives Heidi about five too many kisses on the forehead while insisting that moving in with her was the greatest thing he's ever done.
"Even I can see you're a lying douchebag."
Two questions: 1) why does Heidi always cut off the first syllable of Blahdrina's name? I swear, it always sounds like she's saying 'hdrina. For God's sake, woman, it's BLAHdrina. Don't get it twisted. 2) why does Casey look so scheme-y?
"You never know what I have up my sleeve tattoo."
I don't trust her one bit. Anyway, Heidi toasts Blah on "getting her life together," which makes no sense unless by "Blahdrina" you mean "Heidi" and by "getting your life together" you mean "making two friends in the last two years. And one of them was your sister. Who, actually, now hates you." In which case, yes, kudos, more tequila for everyone.
It's time for O. Snapp's vocabulary lesson of the day. Today's word is "spang," noun, derived from the Latin "spangous" which means extreme embarrassment. Spang is watching someone do something so humiliating that you feel embarrassed for them. It goes beyond regular embarrassment and way beyond sympathy or empathy. It is the reason we watch "Curb Your Enthusiasm" and the reason we love it when Heidi gets drunk. For example, her boss' boss approaches the fun lovin' crew and asks where Brent is.
Heidi: "errrrrrr I dunno, wan' me to get'im for yuu?"
Boss: (pause, inspects Heidi's bloodshot eyes) "Are we still working here?"
Heidi: "Are YOU?"
Ouch. There it is. Furthermore:
Spencer: (looks up at Bossman) "D'you wan' a shot?"
"You know I can have you killed, right son?"
Oh man, that is the WORST. And I mean the BEST! You can see the spang all over Kimberly's face as Boss man shows Spencer to the bar and tells the girls to get back to work. The 20-somethings scatter in about .25 seconds, leaving Spencer to drink alone. I'm not sure why he decided to stay put and keep guzzling, because it looks really awkward, considering even his sister and the Zombie/Homeless duo cut out ASAP.
"Finally, I have all of the lovely ladies of Los Angeles to myself!"
At Fit'Em, Stephanie and LC stroll the grounds, LC wearing a bizarre top that makes her look like a striped water weenie. She's talking about how she still needs to go through all of her cookbooks to make sure Blahdrina takes hers when she moves. "Her what? Cookbooks?" Stephanie asks, and I totally understand her confusion. The mental image of Blahdrina trying to flambè something (or, hell, even sauteè something) kind of frightens me and makes my hand long to hover over the phone, ready to dial 911. I personally don't believe Blahdrina should be allowed access to flammable items.
"Wait, why would you separate them?" Stephanie asks, and LC reminds her that Blah is moving, then proceeds to explain at length just how she feels about how fast this has all happened, how weird it is blah blah blah. "Oh. Yeah, she told me she's getting a house," Stephanie remarks. Congratulations, you're a part of the conversation that's been happening for the last five minutes. We ARE talking about Blahdrina getting a house. Also, the sky is blue and LC has hair extensions. All caught up?
I suppose this was just a good way for Stephanie to tell LC that she's been hanging out with The Blahsters in the company of the Evil Aryan Duo. Steph implies that they're all going to be good friends with Blah now that she lives away from LC, to which Lauren unconvincingly insists that it would have been fine before too, as long as she never brought Heidi to their house. Or ever went to Heidi's house. Or spoke to Heidi. Steph responds with a series of ever-evolving uncomfortable grins. "I dunno... I know that Spencer likes Pigpen. So that might be the new crew," she suggests, much to the chagrin of LC.
"Do you think he, like, LIKE likes him, or just likes him??"
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Comments (10)
What is there to say?
Audrina is an idiot...but that could be said for the whole lot.
Pigpen is your typical selfish self-centered loser, honestly. As long as Audrina keeps coming back to him, he has no reason to change. He can do whatever he wants with no ramifications.
You can tell LC is bored with the show and wants out.
Was Heidi ever really employed at Bolthouse? I seriously want to know.
Thanks for the recap, the actual show sucks.
1 of 10 | Posted by Hey Buddy | Posted on November 7, 2008 9:33 AM
"At People's Revolution, LC is donning an odd hairpiece, a black headband/not-quite-a-headband."
When I saw this I just figured LC's been watching too much Gossip Girl and was trying out Blair Waldorf's style.
2 of 10 | Posted by flowie623 | Posted on November 7, 2008 10:42 AM
My thought after Audrina mentioned that JB was working was "he has a job???"
3 of 10 | Posted by blazergirl | Posted on November 7, 2008 10:49 AM
I was actually shocked when Audrina admitted she bought the house hoping JB would move in! I was just shocked. How incredibly deluded can you be?! I really do feel for her.
Did any of you watch the Aftershow? I think she realizes how ridiculous she looks and is trying to back-peddle. She kept saying she bought the house for just herself, but if everyone around her can tell she didn't (and she herself ADMITTED she didn't), it's a little too late now honey...
4 of 10 | Posted by Thatswhatshesaid | Posted on November 7, 2008 11:02 AM
That was exactly what I though, blazergirl. I never would have thought he was employed.
5 of 10 | Posted by LAjane | Posted on November 7, 2008 3:45 PM
I think I remember way back in the day someone here saying Pigpen is a (lol) barber.
6 of 10 | Posted by here4beer | Posted on November 7, 2008 4:33 PM
Audrina is sooo needy! She is pathetic! Her sister looks like she got in a terrible accident in an ink factory. This re-cap is the best part of The Hills. it is sooo funny!! But, I just knew there was going to be something said about at the end when LC was rubbing Lo's butt. Keep up the good work on the re-caps!!!
7 of 10 | Posted by FatGirlsRule | Posted on November 7, 2008 5:16 PM
Here4beer - Yes, I believe you are right. I think Justin is a hairstylist...
Odd, odd combination.
Audrina just makes me mad. The rest are boring.
Recaps are hilarious, but this show is driving me up the wall.
Thank you, that is all.
8 of 10 | Posted by georgiababe | Posted on November 7, 2008 5:56 PM
Ya know what I would love to see? With Audrina acting like such an effin loser and pissing me off the way she is: JustinBobby just being brutally honest.
If he came out and told her "Listen fun bags, I think you're a hot chick who gives decent head and I like this pseudo celebrity I get from hanging with you and 'the crew'. It's just that I'm not going to be exclusive with you...EVER. As in in forEVER...EVER. So, I'm gonna keep coming around when the cameras are here and we're gonna have sex when I want to. MmmmK? Great."
Put in that position this dumb constipated-looking girl would just nod and say "But you'll come, right?"
Faced with complete honest douchness the outcome hardly changes for chicks like these. So sad. They think they're fooling people around them. It's almost like drug addicts who want to convince loved ones that they can stop whenever they want.
9 of 10 | Posted by uglycutie | Posted on November 8, 2008 10:31 AM
Some questions come to mind...
Ummm, when buying a house, aren't you expected to be in escrow for a 30 day minimum? If so, then why did Audrina wait so long to notify Lauren that she was moving out?
If Heidi really worked for Bolthouse, then why wouldn't we have more paparazzi photos of her during these events? Maybe there are photos of her, but I just don't read the magazines.
10 of 10 | Posted by dani2526 | Posted on November 9, 2008 3:43 PM