Testimonials

That simply couldn't be true! Pigpen is a HOMEBOY y'all! Broday wouldn't let him be stolen away with the promise of fast cars and easy women. Or, more accurately, monogamy and cohabitation. Perhaps Pigpen likes to play all sides, in which case he'd be the dastardly genius of "The Hills," simply by saying almost nothing to anyone, wearing a bomber jacket, cheating on his girlfriend and making up for it with a ride on his motorcycle.

At Bolthouse, Brent calls Kimmy in for a good boss beatdown. Ughhh, don't you hate that feeling, getting called into your boss' office? "Were you and Heidi DRINKING the other night?" he accuses her. "Ummmmm, well I definitely wasn't," Kimberly says. Very tactful of her. And very smart. But Brenthaus doesn't let her off so easily.

"Don't think you can outsmart me. I put on my thinking cap today."

"Sam said you guys were pretty wasted," he says. "OMIGOD not at all!" Kimberly responds, shocked, SHOCKED at this accusation. Brent looks down and pauses for effect. "Was. Heidi. Wasted?" Kimmy's eyes widen and she scrambles for the perfect vague lie. "I... don't think so?" Well, that won't cut it. What kind of liar are you, Kimmy? You'll never make it in this town! He has her send Heidi in.

"Luckily, my hair is really poofy today."

She bobbles in and defends herself by saying that she thought that when everything was taken care of, they were allowed to have a drink. I hate to say this, but that's probably what I would have said in her position. Isn't this how PR peeps get new business? By drinking with new and potential clients? Granted, those clients wouldn't be the Pratts and the Homeless Zombies, but still. However, the problem seems to be more that she was visibly intoxicated, and that displeases Brent. Well, that and the fact that her job there was a lie to begin with and now she wants out, so they've created this minor storyline to give her a reason to leave. So he gets all Donald Trump-ety and fires her. Boom, drama! Cue strings.

"Seriously, my life is SO. HARD."

Actually, it's kind of a funny choice of sappy song they play as she gathers her things: some pussy-sounding boy sings, "Can I go home?" Um, YEAH. How about FOREVER! At least they've set a good example for the kids: try not to get fucked up at work.

At the soon to be Blah-less LauLoBlahteau, a couple of cute, sweaty dudes are getting their big Hollywood break by acting as Blahdrina's moving boys, heaving her possessions into a U-Haul.

"I had no idea hauling a body was so much work."

Meanwhile, inside, Blahdrina packs up her more manageable belongings.

FUCKING SUBTLE, MTV.

Honestly, who has THREE boxes of toothpaste? And why would they pack them in the same box as their books? I guess the only answer is Someone Who's Paid To. Lauren comes in and it seems like just yesterday she was entering the Blahteau and complimenting her hideous dècor just before they'd have one of many cryfests. LC helps her pack and forces a smile while remarking how fast this whole moving thing happened. Blahdrina just kind of nods in agreement, seemingly oblivious to the fact that SHE was the one who made it happen so fast. They both stand there for a second, until LC asks about the framed photo Blah's holding. "Oh, uh it's me and Pigpen, at dinner... somewhere," she says. Way to integrate it into the storyline. Very subtle segue. But segue it be, as it leads LC to ask where Pigpen is. Yeah, where IS her boyfriend on moving day, anyway? Blahdrina mutters some excuse about him working, which seems to irk LC.

"I think my friend alarm is going off? Eh, it's probably just indigestion."

They have a nice sappy girl talk about being there for each other, and in the end share big goodbye hugs, LC inexplicably telling Blah that she's proud of her. I have no idea what for. Consistently forgiving a jerkoff? Notifying LC one week before she moves out? Using spray-tanner? They end with misty eyes and a super wussy song playing over their goodbyes, until LC and Lo can finally bid Blah adieu.

"At least now we don't have to keep the peroxide out of reach."

Like every other episode, by the cheesy end of the half hour, I'm totally over it, so I'm just gonna say whatev's. Watching this episode was the least enthralled I've been all week, so why don't we just forget this little naptime never happened, shall we? See ya on the boards.

« The Island Reunion: Who Spiked KellyAnne's Capri Sun? | Main | Ultimate Fighter: Spunk: (n) Refers to Seminal fluid, (v) Also Means to Ejaculate »

Posted in The Hills by O. Snapp at 12:44 AM | Permalink | Comments (10)
Last Comment: dani2526 on Nov 9, 2008 03:43 PM.