Mark figures out his first clue and gets the task from Jon. Unfortunately, Mark has foolishly placed his faith in the fair citizens of Buenos Aires instead of his trusty map, and thus gets lost immediately. Nicole gets her first location and task, which is to get an Argentinian flag and to take a picture of herself with it in front of an obelisk. She decides to blatantly disregard these instructions, instead taking photo after photo of herself with the flag that's in front of the obelisk, instead of getting one for herself. Jon attempts to patiently reiterate the clue, but Nicole just gets all pissy and actually hangs up on him. NiCOLE! You do NOT hang up on The SmugJon! What are you, CRAZY?! His personal league of minions will come for you!

"Have the puny female killed."
After the commercial, Nicole calls back and Jon smarms that they must have lost their connection. Haha. Jon, you snarky little rapscallion, you. Nicole gets her next clue right, but decides that she's done with this whole "Mole" game thingy and whines that she'd like to go tanning instead. Jon, with a huge shit-eating grin, gives her the clue anyway. Craig is off to his second location, and Mark finally get his first. Gathering together an Amazing Race-worthy fan club of local Argentinian youths, he gets them to buy him an empaƱada, which they all share with glee.

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Nicole, meanwhile, has gone far off the deep end and is now prancing through the streets of Buenos Aires and attempting to cheat by buying a hot fudge sundae, instead of a dulce de leche like she was instructed to. The ever-omniscient JonGod tells her to stop lying and do it right. Ha. A mishmash of other things are happening at this point: Mark is running across town, Craig finds his second clue, and Nicole finally gets her damn dulce de leche, and is amusingly force-fed it by the man who bought it for her. Meanwhile, Jon looks just about at the end of his rope.

"That's right, I said a full case of vodka."
Craig and Mark race to their third locations, take the necessary pictures, and call Jon at almost the exact same time. He sends them the picture of their final destination: the Calatrava Bridge, where he has been playing telephone operator all day. Craig is psyched because he's been wanting to see this thing ever since they arrived in Buenos Aires, and knows exactly where it is. Mark also knows this, and amusingly cries out "It's that stupid bridge!" Relax, Mark. Don't give yourself a nosebleed.
Craig and Mark fly through the streets, and Mark arrives first. I really want Jon to say "Mark, you're the first to arrive," atop a map of the world, with a random Argentinian welcoming him to the country. Alas, no map, and Jon remains eerily silent as Mark begs for the results. Instead, Jon takes him on a romantic stroll to the middle of the bridge, where the dossier awaits him. Mark can't believe that he won, and is understandably thrilled. Jon gives him until the other players arrive to make his decision.
Craig shows up a couple minutes later, and is pissed. Nicole, who didn't even bother to finish the mission and who could very well just have gone shopping or something, is sent for in a car and picked up. LAME. Jon calls Mark over, and after a moment or two of grumbling, he informs everyone that he has decided to take the dossier. Ooh. I'm conflicted on this one. I totally buy that Mark is desperate enough to win this game to keep $75,000 out of the pot, but that is a really huge sabotage, for lack of a better word. I'm 95% sure that the Mole is not Mark, but if it is, this would be the most damning piece of evidence.
So the grand total prize money is $418,500, but Jon bumps it up to $420,000, just for shits and giggles. Haha. Some poor intern just lost their stipend, all thanks to Jon and his insane whims. At the relatively uneventful last pre-quiz dinner, Jon tells them that the final quiz will be twenty questions instead of ten. They look surprised, for some reason, even though this has happened every season. Do your homework, people!
Before the players take the quiz, we get one last dose of insanity for Nicole, saying that she is a "physician, poet, Renaissance woman," and I can practically HEAR the cameramen rolling their eyes.
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Comments (4)
Oh, screampiller. What a season it's been. We've laughed, we've cried, we've changed our minds about who the Mole is 8937221249 times...
2 things:
1- SmugJon has really grown on me. I love him!
2- I am leaning towards Nicole as the Mole. I think she's been trying to be clever and play a "reverse psychology" strategy; like, if I make it so obvious that I'm the mole, no one will ever believe I *am* actually the mole! It has a perverse logic to it, no? But if it's Craig, I won't be shocked in the slightest. If Mark is the mole I will eat my flip-flops for breakfast with maple syrup and butter.
1 of 4 | Posted by here4beer | Posted on August 11, 2008 1:41 PM
Screampillar, you don't really think that SmugJon is reading and writing in do you? Even if "he" provides clues, couldn't the writer be many different people in production of the show that are feeding you info.
Craig is definitely the Mole. The other two a whack jobs.
2 of 4 | Posted by bitchristine | Posted on August 11, 2008 5:20 PM
I laughed hysterically that you mentioned the three questions game, I also griped about missing it.
I wanted so badly to like this season, but I feel like we've been a little let down. I loved the jail and hotel missions from past seasons. And this last mission, seemed far scaled down from the second season one that was similar. I mean who can beat Heather almost being attacked by a wild boar. Stood by Craig the whole time, still do now, although I'd love the shock of Mark.
3 of 4 | Posted by bentley1101 | Posted on August 11, 2008 11:59 PM
If you needed an OB/GYN would you go to Nicole? I sure wouldn't. She's nuts. i dont' think she did herself one bit of good. She better change professions. Other than that it was a good season. I hope they bring it back next summer.
4 of 4 | Posted by 1219tracy | Posted on August 13, 2008 10:36 AM