We start off the night with Ryan, playing the part of Ed Norton in Fight Club, as he has become an insomniac without even the Ikea catalog to keep him company. He does have Seth, however, but wouldn't you rather some cheap Swedish furniture? No?

The next morning, there is a surprise in the form of a gussied up Taylor Townsend. It's only 8 am but Taylor already looks like she is ready to head back to France for a night of working the streets as one of the City of Lights' more prestigious hookers. Oh, I'm sorry, Les Hooker. It's clear that she is using her inherent sexuality to lure Ryan into her web of neurotic hotness. This isn't just obvious to me, it's also obvious to Sandy's eyebrows, as they are decidedly arched when Taylor laments on Ryan's keen wit. That's right, Taylor thinks Ryan is funny. She must be in L-O-V-E. True love, even. I'm talking Pam and Tommy LOVE here. Sadly, Ryan is not as quick on the uptake as Sandy's appendages, as he doesn't really pick up what Taylor is throwing down, when she offers him anything, and I mean anything (that one's for you, CDB), to thank him for helping her out of her loveless French marriage. Alas, Ryan just says thanks, and takes no notice of the fact that while Taylor is making her offer she is pointing to her cooch and simulating oral sex on a breadstick. Oh Ryan!

Julie picked up more than innuendo last night, when she headed out clubbing (I knew that pesky, overly buffed Taran would be a bad influence), as she has some beefcake in bed with her. She rushes him on his way, but he still ends up having an awkward run-in with Kaitlin, who makes the same, lame "if my mother is busy being a Pirate Whore, then she has less time to pay attention to me wah wah" brave face on for Dayplayer Hunk #1 as she did with Dr. Roberts a few weeks ago. We get it, Kaitlin; you're "bad ass."

As the day presses on, so does Taylor, who pops by the Comic Book shop for some cock recon on Ryan. She asks Seth if Ryan is ready to start dating yet, even though Marissa's already-skeletal corpse is still somewhat warm. Okay, maybe not warm, but it wasn't too long ago that Ryan was playing the Brad Pitt role in Fight Club kicking ass, and taking names to deal with his "pain." Regardless, I realize that I'm just being crabby, because we're all over Coop, so of course I want Ryan to be. I'm such an instigator. Anyway, Seth is one step ahead of Taylor, lest we forget that in a battle of the neuroses, Seth comes in with a hot Silver to Taylor's Gold. He nips this whole thing in the bud by immediately calling Ryan to ask him if he's ready to jump back into the shockingly treacherous waters of Newport dating. Seriously, hardly anyone makes it out undamaged from these little trysts. At the very least, the break-up forces them to move out of town.

Ryan is perplexed by the question posed, because it wasn't spoken in Ryan's native language which is basically a series of grunts. Confused, scared, and I suspect a little aroused, Ryan says he isn't sure if he's ready yet. Seth thinks this is a good enough answer and reports back to Taylor. However, since Taylor fucking rules, she sees this is yet another obstacle and one more bullet point on her Resume. Suddenly, Taylor not only has a boy to love, but a project!

Over on the East Coast, the once charming, now somewhat grating B-story, of Summer's metamorphosis into activism is heating up with a trip to the science lab where she and Che are setting a plan in motion where they would set free the precious little bunnies that were being experimented on in the lab. Anyone else totally freaked out by bunnies? Ever since Leonard, Part 6 where bunnies were killers I've found them detestable. Anya's fear of the wascally wabbits on Buffy didn't help either.