A Soprano Family Christmas - 
by EdHIll
I'm struggling to put into words my feelings after watching the quasi season finale of the Sopranos. Maybe it's because this episode wasn't originally meant as the "final episode" since HBO decided to split its expanded 22 episode season into two chunks. Or maybe the writers are just holding back the big guns for the final 8. Either way, this was a pretty mediocre episode as is, and as a season finale, it just left me scratching my head. Nothing really happened and it didn't really answer any questions. Or maybe my whole ambivalence about the episode is based on the fact that it took place at Christmas time. I've hard a hard and fast rule all my life to never watch a Christmas movie or Christmas themed episode of a TV show outside of the Christmas season. It's just not natural. As much as I love Bing Crosby, he needs to be in storage during the summer months. Alas my TVgasm recapping duties forced me to break that rule. TVgasm has a way of slowly corrupting you....
The show opens with Carlo dumping the last of what remains of Fat Dom down a sewer drain. His head to be exact. They stored it in the freezer. This makes me rethink buying a veal parm from a shady looking Italian meat market. How do you know if you're eating veal or the remains of a corpulent middle aged Italian mobster who shoot his mouth off one too many times? Yeah I'm sure he tastes delicious too, but he's probably twice the calories of a nice slice of veal, so I need to know these things going in. I mean sausage I get. You need the high fat content of a Big Dom to make that work, but for a sandwich? No way. That's just gross. After Carlo shoves Big Dom's head down a sewer drain, he calls Silvio to tell him that was the last of it. Meaning the last piece of Fat Dom's body they had to get rid of. As to where they put the other parts of fat Dom, lets just say I would avoid the ball pit at any Chuckie Cheese in the Northern Jersey area for a while. Carlo then asks him if the "barbecue" at Sheepshead bay is still on. Silvio says he isn't sure yet.
We then cut right to Sheepshead Bay (a neighborhood in Brooklyn and hometown to coach Vince Lombardi. TVgasm entertains and educates) where Phil is bringing his mistress. You may remember Phil as the devout catholic murdering mobster with a mistress who decided to beat a man to death because he was a homosexual and it was a sin. The man of course was Vito, and even though he was a homosexual, one of the few things looked down upon in mob circles, he was still a made man. You do not kill a made man without repercussions. Phil and his floozy are getting out of their car next to a store named, in perfect subtle Sopranoish style humor, "Sheepshead Hair Design". Phil is bringing her to their "wire room" which is just a fancy name for a gambling den with bookies that take bets over the phones. Apparently, even though it's illegal, many people will bet money on the outcome of various sporting events. As they get close to the door the entire thing explodes, hurling Phil and his juicy tomato to the ground. Across the street, Benny Fazio watches it all and once its done makes a phone call. We see Tony in a hotel room with one of his new goomar's (I guess the whole thing with him appreciating Carmela more and not cheating on her has passed) and answers the phone. Benny tells him that it's done.
The next day Tony is signing the final papers selling one of his properties to Jamba Juice. After they sign the papers, Tony takes Julianna aside and apologizes about the other night when he decided not to have sex with her and instead be faithful to the wife that laid at his bedside when he was in a coma. He tells her he won't make that mistake again and wants another shot at banging her. She turns him down flat.
| | Next Page... 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 ( Comments ) | Discuss In Our Forums |


