Great recap, only you forgot to add that Balki actually used the word Tongue-age. I'm not even gonna waste my time posting my immense hatred for Plastic face and Horse Choppers

I am surprised you didn't mention that at the end of the show as Omarosa was speaking as the credits rolled, they changed her cackle into a demonic sounding laugh. It was funny as crap! Another hilarious recap!

I am tired of these 2 skanky worn out bitches.

What I find odd is, Janice barely particpated in the burlesque show, claiming she was a PTA Mom, but had no problem showing her twat and ass to the camera, more than once.

Omarosa is just beyond mess. I'd love to know who these fans are that she keeps claiming she has? She just needs to go away.

I suspect this was a plot that Janice and Omarosa cooked up together to get the most screen time. Isn't it obvious?

KH

"Except when Caprice, she of the family Caprice, daughter of the Duke of Mission Viejo who is son of the Earl of Fresno speaks in her faux-British accent, she's "ex-hous-ted."

Soooo funny.

What's next for OmaGROSSa? I wonder if family feud could use her. Too bad Love Boat is off the air..She'd be the perfect star. She could have hooked up with Isaac, while making Doc and Gopher's life miserable. Janice is a disgusting mess, but I wonder, isn't it true she could sue OmaGROSSa for libel and defamation of character, as long as she ISNT a crack whore, etc? I would love to see OmaGROSSa without her weave, makeup and horse teeth. I'm willing to bet she looks like a man. WAIT..maybe she IS a man...

"Cheshire Horse" -- PERFECT, sg-dub!

If I remember correctly, they are only in the house for 10 days. That is a lot of drama for such a short period. This would have been such a better season if Janice and Omarosa were not there. It could have almost just been those two and it would have been the same show.

Did Pepa get a question at dinner?

What a show!!!!

This has got to be the bottom of the barrel. This show has set the bar so low. Is it possible to get any lower?

I'm torn... I couldn't stand this show, but I'm really going to miss these recaps. I DIED at the photo of Balki packing up the cardboard Kleenex box... hilarious!!!

I cant believe this was only for 10 days!!! Why so much drama???

Well done sg-dub!

I could barely handle reading the recaps (well, not really)let alone watching the freakin' show!

Kudos to you!

I haaaaaaaaaaate Omarosa's constant use of the word "naughty". To me, that's a sexual connotation, not a "complete bitch" connotation. I hope I never hear it again. Her 15 minutes expired long ago.

I'm so glad it is over...I do think you are correct in choosing Omarossa as the bigger bitch. What bothers me the most about this, however, is that she would consider that a compliment because "people love me when I'm being naughty". She said that like three times and I wanted to jump through my TV and throttle her. Omorossa, My two year old nephew is "naughty". You, on the otherhand, are a lying, manipulative bitch. Very big difference. Don't flatter yourself with understatements like "naughty". You're a disgusting wench- I hope your 15 are up and over!

I feel like this season was very entertaining, but at the same time, it sunk to new lows. The whole BitchFest proves how far Omarosa will go for some screen time (as Janice).

Oh my gosh! I just had a thought. For the past two seasons, VH1 has spun-off former Surreal Lifers into their own series, Gitte & Foofy Foofy, the Belcher & that Brady kid... what if they have Janice & Omarosa do a Thelma & Louise on America or something? I can see it now... next season on Celebreality, "Mr. Ed & Plasticman Go To White Castle".

I kept asking myself why I was watching this show at all, the whole way through; it was that difficult to view. Glad, no; RELIEVED it's over.

And I laughed at the your recap, but in a weak, Balki-ish kinda way.

Not because you weren't funny, because you were.

But just because I was so very damn tired of it all...sooooo incredibly sick and tired of those two horrible women.

I will never tune into Surreal Life again. Just turned me off the whole premise.

And I will never watch anything with Omarosa again. I'll hit "delete" should I ever see her face cross my TIVO by accident.

And what's all this about Jesus? What the hell does Omarosa know about Jesus? Obviously *nothing*. Evillll woman, that one.

My favorite line: "Except, well, he's still with Pink. Oh well, can't win 'em all." I don't know why I find you picking on Pink so humorous when there are these two ridiculously easy targets...but I do.

"Well, BRONSON PINCHOT Surreal Life, here's hoping that BRONSON PINCHOT Surreal Life enjoys what he finds here. Because BRONSON PINCHOT Surreal Life..."

^ HILarious!
I'm going to miss your brilliant recaps of the most terrible show on VH1 (guess the bar's been set pretty low--what do they have? Best Week Ever and I love the 80's?), though I can't say I'm sad that the season is over.

all your recaps are hysterical and you are the master for us thirty somethingers. lol. omoraso is nothing but an annoying low life piece of crap, she gives true meaning to the working farm animal. racial slur accusations, she would be the poster child for welfare in this country if she didn't have the opportunity to make it on a reality show. thank the lord that trump saw that she was a no good lazy poor excuse for a black women, and sadly im sure she will slither onto tv again, no doubt by being on her knees to get there, and the man on the receiving end should pray that her horse teeth dont scrap his genitals. janet should have grabbed her by her mangy hair and slit her jugular veins. america would have paid for the next plastic surgery just to be rid of omarosa the pig.

deoogepup -

Props for discerning that I'm in my 30's (33 next month). What was it? My endless late 80's/early 90's TV references?

Amber--in the Bible it states that even the demons know who Jesus is and, "they shudder..."
One can only imagine.

BRONSON PINCHOT

I would like to make two points.
1) The recaps were really sensational.
2) Lets not lose site of what an utter creep Bronson Pinchot is. True, he's no Janice or Omarosa but this guy is one sick puppy. This series might have finished off his career.

Of course they could always do a Surreal Life All Star Reunion. 20 days in hell with Omarosa, Janice, Mini Me, Balki, Flavor Flave, etc.

I hate the fact that this entire season became the Janice and Omarosa show. It was interesting for all of one episode and then just plain irritating.

Personally, I would have loved to see more Balki instead. Who would have thought that Jose Canseco would come off as being one of the most stable people in the house.

I luv Omarossa. Why all the hateration on her? Janice Dick-O-Son was the beotch always picking fights with her to get camera time. I await your next project Omarossa.

If Janice appears on camera again her plastic face and boobs will melt off from the heat of the lights. Melt away you wicked witch.

GOOO WHITE SOX!!!!!!!!!!!

I think that Janice and Omarossa are both horrible but would you really just sit at a table and let someone call someone else the terrible things that Omarossa called Janice? Someone really should have stood up and said enough! Omarossa's behavior was just disqusting.

The only satisfying conclusion to that show would have been if Janice and Omarosa somehow destoyed each other, each devouring the other with their black souls and empty heads. As despicable a human being I think that Omarosa in, Janice can only blame herself for the events of the last episode. She was baiting Omarosa all night long, and then had the nerve to act offended when she took the bait.

The truly depressing fact is that this season was really highly rated ... meaning that the both of them will be recruited for more reality shows.

"Strange intermittent outbursts of loud crying followed immediately by a minute or so of complete silence". Funny shit. I loved the show and the recaps.....

Somebody said:

This has got to be the bottom of the barrel. This show has set the bar so low. Is it possible to get any lower?

Yes. They could put together a house full of Def Leppard fans.

Anyone else notice that Pepa accidentally called Janice "Janet" when they were outside after the dinner?

And has anyone timed the actual amount of new material in each episode- not counting the "last time on" and the 3 minutes of repeats after each commercial break? I thought that was only ok in 80's cartoons.

didn't watch the whole season but caught Sally J.'s show and the finale. I thought Omarosa was the biggest bitch around, which to me is nothing to be proud of. I was disappointed that no one defended Janice before she left through the window. I hope Omarosa crawls under a rock, and stays there. Unless, of course, we get lucky and it buries her!

Omarosa won! ROTFLMAO!!

This was so hard to watch but I do believe Janice is on crack, and she messed with the wrong bitch.

Omarosa is crazy as hell. She does not care or back down to anyone. Janice thought she could test her but O drove her insane.

LOL

I like Omarosa, too. Janice tried to bring that crackhead bullshit to O, but she was not having it! I love how Omarosa stays so calm when everyone else is getting all worked up. Janice has a meltdown and the the others try to talk to Omarosa about it, and she's like thanks for your opinion but I really don't care what you think. And she's right about Janice: stop saying you are a good mom ans a PTA parent, but then you show up on TV obviously very high on something, you show your wrinkled pussy and sagging ass every place you go, and you grope and grind on any availble breathing male and/or female, make fun of disabled people, etc. "Good" moms and certainly PTA moms don't do stuff like that. Then when Omarosa calls her on it, Janice gets all mad and "hurt". Whatever. The only thing that Omarosa does that I didn't like is when she talks endlessly about herself and all the deals she has and the fact that she has one of the world's worst weaves. To the person who said she would be on welfare: Omarosa has a master's degree from Howard University-I'm sure she would have found a job somewhere.

omarosa is the clear definition of the loss of talent on television today. she is a complete waste of airspace and, quite frankly, watching that horse-faced, weave-wearing bitch rant and rave about her uninteresting life (*cackle, cackle*) is utterly painful. she calls herself a "professional," who has 'worked' for esteemed administrations and businesses, but she sure as hell acts in a less-than-classy manner when she incessintly calls janice a "crack whore," based on no evidence whatsoever. i'm not saying the plastic queen isn't high on antibiotics (or, you know, household cleaning products..whatever's a quick fix), i'm just saying that, unless miss omarosa's resume includes medical school and/or a degree in psychiatry, she has no right to try and diagnose anyone else's problems. and as far as this "act" she's putting on--yes, i'm sure her tens of fans (counting, of course he mother and ex-hubbie)love this 'persona' she has..it's SO convincing! oh wait. the Dirty Laundry Show portrayed omarosa in an 'unscripted' interview and she was, in real life, bitchy towards the interviewer? who'd a thunk it?

Baby, if getting high on antibiotics or household cleaning products makes you act like a crack whore then the crack dealers will be out of business in a week. Absolutely NOTHING but crack makes you act like Ms. Dick-O-Son did on this show.

^ understandable..im just saying that omarosa, claiming to be so professional and classy, had no right to diagnose janet with NO proof, other than her behavior..i honestly sometimes think that janice just puts on the "druggie" act to get attention..lord knows how much experience she has playing THAT role!

Balki is a serious pervert. I found him really disturbing. And, Janice is the only womn and TV more scary thon Omarosa. But dude I so loved Omarosa standing down Sally Jesse.

I was disappointed by the Sally J. show. Yes, Omarosa may have been the most fake on the show but to act like Janice deserved empathy just showed how fake Sally really is. All the time I watched her show Janice's clips I kept thinking, "Where's the one where she called the mentally challenged dude Rain Main?" I'd like to hear the audience (who had been trained by now to applaud Janice) react to that one. Instead, it seemed as though Sally wanted to make Omarosa the villain when they clearly both behaved poorly. The bottom line is that Omarosa is all about the publicity and we live in an age that believes there is no such thing as negative publicity. I blame all the people who turn reality participants into celebrities with our obessive viewing all of these types of shows. Without us there could be no Omarosa.

And I think the dude who made the comment about Omarosa being a poster child for welfare without these shows has something else that he was trying to say because it made no sense given that she's probably no doubt more educated and marketable than he.

Omarosa may be a bitch, but she never claimed to be anything else. Quite the opposite. She says she's a bitch up front, and she brings it.

Janice Dickenson, on the other hand, tried to play like she was Ms. PTA mom of the year, then showed her crotch and ass every chance she got. She cried "victim" of a pedophelic father, yet SHE was the one who dry humped every man who got within a mile of her. Cast, crew, truckers, you name it.
Nope. Sorry. No PTA mom of the year I've ever seen behaves that way.
As for her being a victim of rape, maybe so. But how in the world does she justify her behavior? Her exhibitionism and the way she "treats men like a salt lick in a cow barn." That was a spot on observation.

I don't know if she's on crack, but I almost hope so. That's curable. If she's NOT on crack and behaves that way normally, that's the poorest excuse of humanity I've ever seen.

I have to agree that Janice's kids are cursed with one seriously piss poor mom. Forcing kids to live with an adult who behaves the way she does (crack or not) is abusive, and I think she should be investigated.
Selfish to the bone.
If she cared one bit about her kids, she'd take a good look at how she lives and make some very serious changes.