Andrea didn't actually show up until #6, above both Brigitte Nielsen and Chyna Doll. Ron got that one right, and Ron got the next one right also. The next question would be the final question if Ron got it right, and he did. (If anyone was wondering, the last four, from least to most hits, was Pepa, Mini-me, Vanilla Ice and Ron Jeremy himself.) So with that, Pep was eliminated, and we truly had a battle of Beauty vs. Beast for $100,000. That's exactly how that movie went too, wasn't it?
It's a lot like CNN Situation Room.. . only for useless shit.
Robin told the final two that he would be back later to pick them up. Traci changed into a hot dress, and Ron laid around, moping. Robin came back and picked them up and took them to the "execution" as he called it. He dropped them off at an alley, and said they were to walk down the alley, and at the end of it was their fate. At the end of the well-lit alley was a person underneath a cloak, and who was it?
Why, it's Kathy Griffin, she of the D-list. She says that she'll be the judge of who wins the $100,000. Ron says that both he and Traci know Kathy very well, and we see the final count of the Name Drop-o-meter. If you had 37 in your office pool, congratulations on all the money you won.
Kathy had both Ron and Traci sit down across from her on a couch. Then Traci told us she was starting to get nervous and depressed, and for no reason whatsoever, we see a shot of "mirage" of Verne, looking like Obi-Wan Kenobi perhaps? Wtf VH1? Do you have some sort of crazy graphics quota you have to fill for each episode?
Anyways, first Kathy derides Ron for dressing like a hobo while Traci looks amazing. Ron said he didn't know it made a difference how he appeared. I think that's a hint you may not be an A-lister. A-listers dress well Ron; even Kennedy knows that.
The first challenge was to give an Oscar acceptance speech. Ron thanked his family, but he couldn't remember any friends' names. What happened to the name dropping Ron? It was kind of funny to hear Kathy's voice-overs during each person's speech, especially when she said she was going to take "crazy-lessons" from Traci. Funny AND true. Anyways, Traci's sounded better and more sincere.
Ok, Im officially done with weed.
Next, the A-lister had to handle somebody shouting out a snide comment to them. Ron handled that one well, because I'm sure he's gotten that a lot in the past 30 years he's been in porn. Kathy pretended to yell "Are those boobs real?" to Traci, and Traci said, "The last time I checked they were. Wanna feel?" Ron was jealous that she would say that but that he couldn't feel them. Also, I'm pretty sure they're not real. Unless she means real in the way that you can feel and see them, like sand, as opposed to not real, like *SPOILER ALERT* Santa Claus.
After that, Kathy wanted to dance with each person as if they were on Dancing with the Stars. It could happen Ron; it worked for Heather Mills. Just start doing a lot of charity work. Anyways, Ron and Kathy danced slow, and it was kind of awkward, and he said he dances fast better. Then a fast song came on for Traci and Kathy to dance to, and Ron was jealous, perhaps not realizing that there would have been a long discussion about who would lead if there was a slow dance, and then it ultimately would have ended in chicks making out. Or maybe it was just less awkward for two girls to dance fast.
Finally, Kathy wanted to hear why each person thought they deserved to win. Ron started off boring, brought out being in the most movies ever, and he didn't really have a good answer. However, Traci's answer just made her sound insane, so I thought Ron won this point.
Kathy had had enough, and she was ready to make her ruling. She said she was only judging based on what had happened tonight, as she luckily didn't have to watch the rest of the season like some of us. She had each person stand in front of a door. One door led to $100,000 and the "A-list," and the other door led back to a sad, lonely existence, and title of #1 Loser. And that loser was...?
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Comments (7)
Rob obviously went over the deep end in this episode. I understand that he felt betrayed. But, he shouldn't have put too much faith in Ron seeing how it is a competition. And he also didn't need to react like a loon. Besides, it's just a game. He'll make more than $100,000 anyway with that new CD he's putting out....YEAH RIGHT! Actually, maybe Rob was so mad because some of that $100,000 would have kept his electricity on next month.
Also, between her & Ron, Traci deserved to win. Ron looked like a hobo at that final challenge. What was he thinking?
1 of 7 | Posted by hollabackboy
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Posted on March 27, 2007 12:51 PM
couldn't we all have saved those 11 hours (or however long this horrible show was) by just flashing the "top 10 google searches" right when they got in the house? isn't that a pretty good indicator of fame? i don't know, just sayin. jesus, that show was horrible.
2 of 7 | Posted by Shelby Olive | Posted on March 27, 2007 1:28 PM
Great recap of a horrible show. Why did I watch that crap? Better yet - why did I then watch the marathon of that crap all over again?
I think I need help.
I hope Traci uses the money to buy a better weave so she can stop with the damned combover.
3 of 7 | Posted by TinkerbellAPixie | Posted on March 27, 2007 2:53 PM
So thrilled that Traci won and not that fat windbag Ron Jeremy! Agreed with the poster above, Miss Bingham does need a new weave, or at least that rat's nest cleaned.
I think Mr. Ice wants his own reality show on VH1...you laugh now, but I bet its in the works.....
I just didn't want Andrea Blowhole to win.
KH
4 of 7 | Posted by katieshole | Posted on March 27, 2007 3:40 PM
It was clear that Robin Leach was trying to help Peppa on her last chance at the google game. He was like "PEPPA, you really need this next answer PEPPA. If you don't PEPPA, then you will go home PEPPA PEPPA PEPPA." And then... she lost.
BACKSTABBER!!!
5 of 7 | Posted by g3
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Posted on March 27, 2007 6:37 PM
Traci is a delusional hypocrite. She kept bitching and moaning the entire game, then in the end she was all high and mighty. Also, she really thinks she's an A-list star!
I really hate Vanilla Ice. He should have followed through on one of his numerous threats and gone home. And, he's plain nuts, which I'm sure he mistakes for being interesting.
He would have done the exact same thing to Ron, had he been in the same position. (pun intended)It's a competition, for crying out loud.
6 of 7 | Posted by Veronica DeBellegarde | Posted on March 28, 2007 6:42 AM
^
Hey Anonymous,
It made me laugh out loud to read your post. I live near Fort Myers, Florida and Robert Van Winkle is indeed our local weather man. And he really does do that sign language thing every night. He did kick ass during Hurricane Charley, going against the opinion of the National Weather Service to tell us that he thought the hurricane was turning toward us. He was right. Love that guy!
7 of 7 | Posted by Pamsey
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Posted on March 29, 2007 12:01 PM