What happens in Vegas, stays in heavy vh1 rotation - 
by sg-dub
I'm not sure how many episodes of The Surreal Life are remaining, but we must be getting near the end of the season. Heck, I hope so as I need to clear out a lot of TiVo space for the impending fall season. The sad part is that I have two dual input machines. Ahhhhh, sweet, sweet TV, I suckle at your cathode teat. With that in mind, I caressed my ergonomic remote control (I call him "Mr. Buttons" but you don't need to know that) and prepared for another half hour of Janice Dickenson being herself. That is, being a complete idiot.
The houseguests were roused at 7AM with no idea what was in store for them. Amid the grumbles and groans, Carey Hart grabbed the day's Surreal Times and learned they were all off to Vegas, baby. Without the "Vegas(t)" idea of why they were going there, they quickly packed for Sin City and clambered aboard a luxury bus. (I know that my use of "Vegas(t)" instead of "vaguest" wasn't funny or really all that clever. In fact, it was probably hard to decipher. However, I decided it was such a reach and so stupid that my inner editor left it in the recap. This reminds me, there is a job open for the position of my inner editor. Please send your resumes to my email address below. You must describe your ability to "get inside my brain" and control me like a marionette.)
Wow, that was random. Hey, with this show, I need filler. Like, seeing the nice luxury bus the show provided, I was reminded of "Missy Elliot's Road to Stardom" and how they gave the hopefuls the crappiest bus in history to drive around "on tour" in. I thought that was pretty cool. Okay, I'll stick to the show here on out. I promise. During the drive to Las Vegas, Omarosa drank way too much coffee and her giant gums just would not stop flapping. Like the rest of the world, she expressed amazement at the fact that she was featured in an E! "True Hollywood Story" last year. Gee willikers - I just checked and that THS was about ALL of the Apprentices, not just her. But why interrupt her delusions of grandeur? She went on to happily admit that she can't even go to the grocery store anymore without getting mobbed by "fans." Not content with leaving it at that, she bragged to everyone that she had signed with an agent and had many projects lined up. I'm sure this was scintillating to the busload of people who have all had agents and money for years. Even Balki was laughing at her. But behind the laughter were tears... Balki's life wasn't all laughs and big paydays; we'll explore his descent into depression and drug use after the break. (How's that for a THS segue?)
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