It's morning in the Top Chef house, and Evangelos is feeling the searing burn of hatred radiating from the other chefs. He's been hearing rumors (aka screaming in his face) that people thought it was his ass that should have gone home last week, and not even a propeller beanie can cure his depression. As the ringleader of the anti-Evangelos contingent, Beasty is determined to win this thing now for both the lesbian lovers, and Ryan's just hoping that everyone will be distracted enough to allow him to skate by for yet another week. Meanwhile, on the Lisa-Dale front, Lisa's still pretty upset with the crotch grabbing, and she and Dale have a quick talk. He technically apologizes for bringing Little Dale into things, but defends his position that she's an annoying bitch who never stops complaining. Needless to say, that does not go over too well.

The chefs arrive at the kitchens for this week's Quick Fire. Waiting for them are pitchers of different kinds of beer, as well as Scar and guest judge Koren Grieveson, chef de cuisine of Chicago restaurant Avec. Scar announces that each chef will get to taste three beers before choosing one, not knowing what any of them are. They will then have 30 minutes to prepare a dish that complements their selected beer and the theme of Simple Pleasures.

During the beer tasting, we learn that Dale and Evangelos know next to nothing about beer, while Mutton has been doing keg stands since he was 12. Beasty, meanwhile, is pumped that she got Land Shark Lager because her hair is like a shark fin, which really isn't a look I think anyone should be shooting for. Although we've got at least two takers between her and Richard.

Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking?

And off they go. Richard evidently is going to go au naturel (ugh not a pretty picture) this round, and not using any of his science shit to help him make a sandwich. Antonia tells us it's very hard to make a simple dish, since you need to dumb it down for your audience. If by that you mean you aren't going to cover everything with some reduction sauce crap then fine, dumb it down. Pretend we're all at a 6th grade eating level. Dale decides to do something involving pork and pretzels, and throws the pretzels into a blender. And then proceeds to be shocked that they got ground up into dust. Hell, even someone with a 2nd grade eating level could have told you that. Beasty is just a machine with a whisk for an arm.

Scar and Koren (who is evidently Lisa's doppelganger, only 30 pounds lighter) come in for the judging. Richard thinks Koren knows a little something about pounding back beers, so that and her poker face make him nervous and he can't tell what they thought of his grilled tuna sandwich. Dale's pork/pretzel dish, Antonia's cod, Yoda's steamed muscles, and Ryan's crepenette all get the same silent, poker face treatment.

Twitch has made a gastrique with rainbow trout, but Koren thinks that it needed more acidity. After all, she's an acid person. He says he understands, given that he's a coke person, and asks where he can find a good dealer in Chi-town. Nikki believes that anyone who drinks beer also enjoys wife beaters, NASCAR and fried food, so she's offering up some fried shrimp (which I admit look pretty tasty, but I'll eat almost anything deep fried). She actually pries a reaction from Koren who says "Great, thank you." Mutton got one of my favorite beers, Stella Artois, and pairs it with lamb rack. Maybe Koren's starting to get drunk from all the beer tasting, but she's on a verbal roll, telling Mutton that the flavors are really nice.

The chefs should be honored that Koren dug out her least-ratty jeans and favorite old t-shirt for her big television debut.

Evangelos created a charcuterie, which is basically his fancy name for a chopping block with meats and cheeses, as well as some clams. Scar and Koren do not seem happy, but tough guy Evangelos tells us he doesn't give a shit. Lisa's bacon cheeseburger also stumbles because it needs more heat. Beasty's beignets, however, get what amount to rave reviews from the taciturn Koren.

« Rock The Cradle: Look, just try not to mess it up too bad. Ok, kid? | | Big Brother: Ashton Kutcher Pees in the Sink »

Posted in Top Chef by LoLo at 11:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (8)
Last Comment: smaile on Apr 22, 2008 02:41 PM.