It's a sad thing about human nature that the person who is undeserving in these shows always gets reamed, rather than the judges, who are really at fault. Look at how much everybody is hating on Logan on Project Runway. And, sadly, '80s Hooker is super-annoying, what with trying to "help" by telling Fat Kid what plate to use, etc. It sounds exactly like my mom! And fer sure Fat Kid has mommy issues.

The one who came off the worst in this conflict was good ol' Sexist Pigshit. Why does that not surprise me? Plus, Big Volt is starting to grow on me. I think he stayed in one place and learned to do one kind of cuisine excellently, while Lil Volt traveled around and now does a number of kinds of cuisines mediocrely. "Jack of all trades and a master of none."

I absolutely LOVE your wine names. Sanford & Son--what would that taste like, do you think?

Love you, JMo.

I am firmly Team 80's Hooker...wow, that doesn't sound like what I'm trying to say at all!! Anyway, I only want her to stay to continue to irritate the crap outta Fat Kid! I cannot stand him! He will never move out of mommy's basement because NO ONE will love him like her!

So, you were at the IUPUI University Hotel, huh? I work in one of the neighboring hospitals! You could've come over & watched with me on one of my 4 a.m. breaks!!

As always, great recap!

DirtyBear is the only one with true class and BitterJen does a good job staying out of the immature spotlight too. Robin would be very tough to live with, but that house is big enough to walk away...isn't it? Eli lives with his parents and has a girlfriend. Wow...what is she like??

J-Mo, you cutie pie... great recap!

Fat Kid lives with Mommy and Pappi? Jeez, the jokes just write themselves here.

80's Hooker does not have the skill to make it all the way, but it is my fondest wish that she outlasts either Oedipal Fat Kid or Sexist Pigshit,preferrably both. That would just make my day. She can be annoying but she is no where near as obnoxious as FK and SP. She at least tries to act civilized. The frat house mentality each week is disgusting.

Lovin' on Dirty Bear. He really cooks to please himself, and to his own standards - which seems to succeed for him. Jen too -they both seem less concerned about attacking their fellow cheftestants and focus on doing their very best.

The Low Voltage boys are talented, but really need to resolve their Cain and Abel ways - it's annoying to watch them play "whose got the bigger schlong" week after week.

Thanks for the clip - even with a back brace you got the moves! Great performance -

Hugs, J-Mo - your recaps always make me smile (and occasionally snort liquid out my nose). oxoxox

J-Mo you had me laughing all the way through this recap. Honestly, this one was one of the best I've ever read from anyone. And you even included a video! Dinner AND a show. Very entertaining and I loved it. Thank you!

Dirty Bear is still my favorite. Do any of you guys watch the extra clips and all on Bravo's video menu? The Slice and Dice competitions are amusing.

I want to root for Jen, but I think the pressure is getting to her. I honestly think the top 3 are going to be the Volt bros. and DB.

I can't wait to read your take on the Restaurant Wars, J-Mo. Thanks again for the fabulous recaps!

J-Mo:

Thanks for the great recap...Sexist Pigshit and Fat Kid can suck it. They talk all this big game and they are awful chefs. That seriously pissed me off when Fatty Gel Face won.

Loved the video, even with the drugs and back brace you still moved better than me on a good day. Love ya!!

Yay J-Mo, you pheeee-nominal human being you! Charlie Palmer is Cliff Clavin? Best Comparison. Ever. It was so good it makes me want to re-watch the episode to see if he's wearing white socks.
Awesome, awesome job buddy.

I love DirtyBear & Jen too. I live in Atlanta, and am happy to say I have never eaten at Eli's restaurant, and I never will - solely because of his behavior on this show. What a tool.

I want to stick up for Big Volt though. I'm really liking him after the last couple of episodes. I think he seems like the level-headed, calm older brother who has been suffering with this twerpy little asshat of a younger brother for years. It seems to me like most of the "rivalry" is driven by Lil' Volt's insecurities, and that Big Volt really tries to be the bigger person, so to speak. Them snapping at each other over the saran wrap was a perfect example - BV said something like "hurry up" in a joking manner (or at least that's how I interpreted it), and LV took the opportunity to be a complete douche. I think Dirty Bear even commented on the way LV pushes BV's buttons.

After LV's interaction with 80s hooker, I'm almost lumping him in the same category with Fatty & Pigshit. Big Volt goes with Dirty Bear and Bitter Jen. I hope they are the top 3. I'm sure that won't happen though, because there's no way we're getting 3 nice, likeable people at the end.

I can not take this show anymore. It is seriously a huge disappointment. I am afraid that Gelly, Gel Fatty Fatster and Sexist Pigshit are all going to almost make it to the end because based on their obnoxious and annoying personalities. And not on their cooking. These are the type of Top Chef contestants that get into the final because they are the biggest douches out of all the other douches. Only this is a more extreme version of them and it makes watching the show a horrible experience. I am over it, but never will I give up on these recaps.

I think that Pigshit, Little Volt and Fat Kid are much worse than 80's hooker because they are just huge bullies. I don't think that she is being passive aggressive, but more that she is just trying to tolerate their bullshit. Everyone has a breaking point and they have pushed her too far.

Christmas on a cracker. The video of you dancing was out of sight and dynamite. I don't believe you that you were in a back brace and in pain. You didn't move like that and I think I was more focused on you than on Devina.

Okay I totally don't mean to be an ignorant, redneck, duggar family type person because I love, love the gay community. But what is with the drag queens? Other than that most of the woman are hilarious and beautiful. But I just thought the gays didn't so much like the vaga or the breasts. Although my gay male friends do like to hone in on the breasts, so that point is moot. But hopefully I am not asking to obnoxious of a question. Sorry in advance if I did.

Thanks again J-Mo Great recap as always....

I am on team 80s Hooker. I guess cause I really can't see what is so annoying about her. I know she takes on mother mode but just ignore her or whatever and she will get the point. I honestly think she's trying to be nice and daggone she acts alot like the other cancer survivors I know. You have to have nerves of steel to get through what that does to you physically,emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually.

As for Fat Kid - it's hard to have respect for someone who obviously doesn't respect anyone else- therefore the chubby waste of space can go for all I care and take Sexist Pig with him too.

Dirty Bear is in the zone - I wuv him. He made me think of bacon jelly. I NEVER heard of that before. But I agree with some of the other bloggers that Bitter Jen is beginning to crack. She's such a perfectionist I think it's hard for her to shake it off when she makes a mistake. Now if she borrows some of 80s Hooker's nerves of steel she'll be fine. She made a dish with beans and it was great. Legumes seem to be an Achilles heel to chefs on this show. It's up there with desserts.

And yes I think Big Volt is the bigger man. It is becaming painfully clear that L'il Volt goes out of this way to mess with him. And yes it does appear to be insecurity - for which LV would slash his own wrists before admitting to it.

It's so neat all the traveling you do. You love to entertain and do it. I am trying to---be a novelist (ducking head). I've been trying to write a book for oh 25 years. I finally realize if this is what I wanna do I need to finish it and send it out. Daggone if an amateur can write about sparkly vampires and inject every crazy love story and love song idea in the books and have people squealing over it- there's hope for me. Oh weeelll that's my dream. I guess with all the typing I do, it gives y'all an idea how much I like to write...

J-Mo, you are phenomenal. Thank you for the video; I adored the whole thing (vest up and all !)

I agree with what everyone is saying about sexist pigshit and fat boy. I know it makes for good tv--hey, I'm watching and commenting too. But all their hot air isn't doing a good job of masking that their cooking just isn't up to par with the others.

I don't know if anyone ever mentioned this, but I was watching an old IRON CHEF AMERICA where Richard Blaise was the challenger. One of his sous chefs was Eli the Fat Boy. He was actually much fatter then. Did anyone else see it?

And--before I sign off--EVERY time I read the words "Tiny Tewwible Toby" I laugh right out. It's my favorite nickname ever.

Looking forward to the next installment!
--Silver

Jmo, you're gay?

LOL...Just kidding, you are an awesome recapper, love your shit! Cool suit bro.

Aggie

J-Mo, I can't believe you were wearing a back brace in that dance - I really couldn't tell. I think you guys should audition for the next season of ABDC. I AM SERIOUS.

Anyway, as far as the show goes....I still think the final three should and will be some combination of the Volts, Dirty Bear and Bitter Jen. I really REALLY want both Dirty Bear AND Bitter Jen to make it all the way, but she is definitely starting to crack - pull it together woman!!!

If Fat Kid or Sexist Pigshit make it into the finale it will be like season 2 all over again for me. HATE.

I think it's total bullshit that Cliff gets to come on the show and judge even though two of the chefs have worked for him before and yet we still have NO Eric Ripert - WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?

Thanks so much for yet another side splitting recap - you always make me laugh out loud. Several times.

SWAK, PottyMouth

Don't they usually save Ripert for the finale? He is one sexy sounding man, I just don't understand a word he says!

I'm loving Big V. He stays professional except when cussing out his lil' bro, which I would totally do in his place.

Hoping Bitter Jen, Big V and Dirty Bear (who I think would make a great Santa Claus if he had gray hair) go to the end!

Great recap, J-Mo!

So, FatAss thinks that it's "a little hokey" to be in his position and still living with his folks - RENT FREE? It's a whole lot hokey, and irresponsible, and rude, and inconsiderate. After having raised his fat ass through the years, they were probably looking forward to some sexy-time where they knew they wouldn't create another asshole like him - and he doesn't even have the common courtesy to leave so they can fuck in peace! MOVE OUT, and pay your OWN bills, ASSHOLE!!

Ahh ... I feel so much better now.

So, Charlie Palmer is the "pioneer of American cooking" (allegedly!)? Wouldn't it rightfully be some of our Native American ancestors that were the first to cook American food? (My people call it maize). Just asking.

Yay! for assless chaps!

I agree that I don't understand why they were all tiptoe-ing around Cliffie - it's not like it was Gordon Ramsay who would tell you to get your ******* *** out of here and **** off, and while you're at it grow some ********, and **** a **** and leave my ******* kitchen, you ****!

You are correct, Hoser would have definately made Pork, Potatoes and Pee-No if he was in this competition.

I think that Daddy Tom is much more worth his $12,000 per minute than that sorry-excuse-for-a-father-husband-and-human-being Jon Gosselin who thinks that his time and talent is worth $12,000 per hour. That is the price he supposedly quoted a radio station somewhere when they asked him to sit in as a guest-host. What a tool!

Why was Lil Volt wrapping his GladWare in GladWrap? Those lids fit nice and tight, without the need for any extra wrap. Was he just pissing off Big Volt? Hmmmmmmmmmmm?

I snicker when I think of, or say, Pork Butt as well. And it still baffles me why the call it the butt, when it's the shoulder. Maybe when I had my rotator-cuff repair I should have told folks that I had to go in for butt surgery.

Take care until next time. Restaurant wars - Whoo Hoo!!

Lots O' Love

PS: Pixielated: I am sure that Sanford and Son wine would have to taste just like RIPPLE, as that was what Fred G. Sanford was always trying to sneak past Aunt Esther. LOL

Oh yes. I forget to tell you that the Cliff Clavin comparison was, as they say on the mastercard commercial, priceless and probably the most funny thing I have read in a way. And when you said I totally saw old Cliffie. Well done sir. I say well done.

Also. Yes. I am totally on Team Dirty Bear. He actually has some class. And I seriously hope Bitter Jen doesn't lose it in the end. If Fleasa can make it to the end then Bitter Jen better sure as hell pull it out. I am worried that Dirty Bear is going to go the way of annoying faux hawk Richard Blaise and it going to choke at the end. But I think that might be more likely of Little Volt. Hopefully.

Yay, I'm so glad to be back amongst love and joy again!!

pixielated... I think you hit the nail on the head with "Jack of all trades and a master of none." And I'm glad you enjoyed the wine names, and if I'm being honest, I have to admit it was partially driven by me being ornery about the upper-crust nature of wine-appreciation because I don't understand it and it makes me feel white-trashy all over again... the only thing I can determine when I taste wine is if it would a.) get me drunk quickly or b.) burn coming back up. Thanks for the love! xoxo :)

brattygrl... Yay for Team 80's Hooker! I'm totally right there with you on that one. Also, shout out to Indy girls like you, is the weather always so rainychilly at this time of year? The campus of IUPUI was nice, though, and we liked downtown, too... in fact, if you want to see pictures of both places, as well as some of the queens, visit last week's recap and follow that same link to a Photobucket folder called "Miss Gay US of A At Large 2009" and it's likely you'll recognize a lot of the places we went (and acted stupid at!). Glad you enjoyed the recap! xoxo :)

bluzgirl... Hmmm, I'd guess Fat Kid's girlfriend has a very shiny face, with a big mouth... and an air-valve. And several patched leaks. And smells like stiff sheets. xoxo :)

njgasmifan... Aww, shucks, you make me blush! Glad you enjoyed the recap and the video... I agree that 80's Hooker should remain in that house like herpes for as long as possible to annoy and irritate the douchebags (notice DirtyBear and Big Volt do not seem to be bothered by her?). Thanks for the love! xoxo :)

cbc-cca... Wow, you are REALLY too kind, but I'm super-happy you enjoyed the dog-and-pony-show! I have never watched any of those extra videos on Bravo's site, mostly because they put me through a really convoluted process to get pictures of the damned food (y'all would not BELIEVE the process I have to go through to get them, I can't just right-click and save anymore) but maybe I will now! Thanks again! xoxo :)

Yanksfan24... I could NOT agree with you more about the SexPigFatKid suckage! So glad you liked the video! xoxo :)

waffleboy09... Boy, I wuv you for kudos always, especially since you consistently pull out awesome metaphors in "Dollhouse"... and P.S. I promise I will reply soon! xoxo :)

buckrogers... THANK YOU for your pledge of never patronizing Eno or Emo or whatever-the-fuck-Fat-Kid's-restaurant-is-called, hopefully more of da ATL will agree with you. Also, I'm praying you're wrong that we won't/can't have three likeables in the finale, in dire times like these we all need our glimmers of hope here and this is mine. Thanks for the comment! xoxo :)

reckless_saturn_11... oh honey, hang in there with us, hopefully we will all get a great big bowl of satisfaction seeing Sexist and Gel Fatty Fatster (OMG, I totally giggled over that!) get booted before they can reach their goal. Also, I'm kind of with you on them wrongfully branding 80's Hooker as passive-aggressive, I think she's just wacky and the others don't like it because she's not concerned with being "cool". As for the question regarding drag queens, let me talk about that (at least from my point of view) in another comment in a bit. Glad you enjoyed the video and the Cliff Clavin Comparison! xoxo :)

viane slice... sugarpie, I'm with you, cancer-survivors get a pass in my book, if they wanna be wacky I say let them be wacky, they've faced down DEATH for God's sake! And I say don't be ashamed about wanting to be a novelist/writer, be proud that you want to jump right in and tell stories, everybody loves stories, right? I always love your elaborate comments, I love to know what everyone thinks! Except for Sexist Pigshit and Fat Kid and Li'l Volt. Thanks for the love! xoxo :)

silver... I think you're right about Fat Kid having appeared with old BlazeHawk on IC, I think there might have been a couple of comments about that recently, and it makes me wonder how BlazeHawk feels about the douche that Fat Kid is making of himself, cuz Richard was never like that. However, their close association would explain why I hate Fat Kid's hair so much. Thanks for the kudos! xoxo :)

wmdaggie... LOL, can't you hear my gay accent lisping it's way out of yoru computer through my writing? And I'm glad you like the suit, I like it too, except for that whole too-short-vest-pull-up-and-expose-my-bowling-ball-of-a-belly-thing it tends to do! Glad you liked the recap! xoxo :)

PottyMouth... Thanks girl, I will pass the kudos on to Devina and the Fly Boyz and Evolution, I'm sure they will be pleased. As for the Eric Ripert thing, perhaps the reason why Cliffie was allowed on and he's not is because the Volts no longer work for him, and Bitter Jen is currently employed by Eric... I'm guessing that would be a much clearer conflict-of-interest, considering that the winner of Top Chef gets a lot of press and that would likely generate even more income for 10 Arts if they could brag a winner... if Eric had a hand in that it would ruin it for her I'm sure. But I also agree with you, I still think it was bullshit that they let Cliffie on after having had a TEN YEAR working relationship with Big Volt... who still didn't win, oddly enough. Hmmmm. Thanks for the love! xoxo :)

zerocool... I'm right there with you about Big V, he reminds me of MY older brother (but I was never such a little shit as Li'l Volt) and I think he HAS to be embarrassed that his brother acts like such a dickbag on TV and brings shame to their family. So he works extra hard to combat that, and I've also appreciated him sticking up for people instead of jumping on the Sheeple's Bandwagon of "Let's Hate The Cancerous Old Lady". Thanks for the love! xoxo :)

arizonatom... LOL, hey, don't forget, it was Fat Kids' parents HAVING SEX IN THE FIRST PLACE that unleashed all this horror on the world (and our TV screens) in the first place. And I can't believe I forgot to mention the fact that Li'l Volt WAS wrapping his containers in an extra layer of plastic wrap. I'd say it's because he hates the Earth. And humanity. And the feeling is becoming mutual I think ...except for some of the ladies, I see comments all OVER BravoTV from women saying how amazingly sexy he is, and I. Just. Don't. Fucking. Get. It. Unless our nation is filled with ladies who want to live through "The Burning Bed" or date Chris Brown. I dunno, it's a mystery. Thanks for the love! xoxo :)

Wow, thanks guys, I really appreciate all the input and I'm sorry it's taken me so long to be able to comment back, you guys are great!

love, J-Mo :)

xoxoxox

I am trying to win the tvgasm award for most post. Or I could be studying math. But I forgot to mention thank you for posting the pictures of the other drag queen contest you went to. I think you posted it in your last recap and I never said thank you. The dresses were fabu. Thanks. Loved them. I bet your friends just love you to pieces.

J-mo, how do I love thee, I can't even count the ways!!!! You are such an awesome dancer, it is sheer joy to watch you guys perform--I wanna give you a big hug around that bowling bowl!!!! Let me know if you guys ever compete in LA--I'll bring out the troops to cheer for you!!!

NJgasm, I soooo agree, how awesome would it be to see 80's take down the douche patrol. . . I just hope Jen can pony up, but I'll be all good with DB (Kris Kringle) taking this one!!! I think he's the sweetest winner I've ever seen, and the most like Stephanie of all--who I credit with having an incredibly good palate!!!

XOXOXOXO

Oh and J-Mo. I hope that you weren't offended with the question. I know you said that you would rather answer it in another comment. But I just hope that I didn't upset you. All my other gay male friends didn't really have a good answer for me. Since their main involvement with drag queens is either a few shows every couple of months or at Sunday brunch. xoxo-

Reckless, I'm not a drag queen, but when I was young I was way more into my feminine side . . . My mother was a model, and I have to say, women have so many fun things to play with--just the shoes alone!!! I don't think it has anything to do with attraction, it's about being fabulous!!! My most successful drag time was doing the Spice Girls at the house of Blues and winning group prize!!! Sadly, it's probably because we were a laugh riot of horribleness . . . but the girl(guy) doing Ginger was gorge!!!
Maybe drag is an aquired taste, most of the gay hate is based on being queeny so it's touchy for some. Nath I have embrassed my inner teenage girl, and frankly, most times people find me funny it's coz I'm riffing on being a big girl!
And drag aside, J-mo's crew are the bomb--thank god they were'nt at house of blues or I wouldn't have had a giant tube of rasberry lube for years . . .

Hey everybody! I was recently asked the question "What is with the gay community and drag queens?" and I wanted to take a few minutes out to answer that question... at least as far as *I* am concerned (because I really can't speak for all of the other gays out there).

Okay, in a general sense, here's part of what I find admirable about drag queens:

a.) They were there fighting the police harassment right alongside the lesbians way back at the Stonewall Inn riots back in 1969, which was an event that started the movement for gay rights in America, and helped us all to get to where we are today.

b.) They are a visible part of the community not just via performing, but also by being major forces of fundraising. I personally have been involved with and performed at benefit shows (as a dancer) that have assisted worthy causes such as Hurricane Katrina Victims, AIDS charities, Gay Youth programs, Transexual Halfway Houses, Meth Rehabilitation, and especially for specific members of our community who have taken ill and not had any insurance.

c.) It takes a real strong man to put on makeup and wigs and hose and heels and walk out on a stage and perform in front of people. There is a LOT of work (and downright pain) that goes into the illusion that most people never see or care about, not to mention the sheer force of will it takes to keep on doing it week after week in front of drunken bar crowds who will glare at you and not tip you and not clap for you and take unflattering pictures of you and post them all over the interweb while they pick apart your every little flaw.

d.) They make the rest of the middle-of-the-road gays (and ESPECIALLY the closet-cases) seem more palatable/normal to the non-gay population by pushing the masculine/feminine line so far over to one side that it becomes a caricature. The people who bitch and moan about drag queens because "thats all you ever see on TV whenever they show a Gay Pride parade and it makes us all look baaaaaad!" are missing the bigger picture effect that comes from that. Of COURSE they're going to show drag queens on TV, they are sparkly and outlandish and wacky and colorful and TV networks want high ratings and lots of viewers! And those sparkly, outlandish, wacky, colorful DRAG QUEENS are the ones who are out there pushing the envelope for everyone else... sometimes at considerable risk to their personal safety.

Ok, that's just my general take on drag queens and their contribution to society. I fully recognize that some people are just plain not comfortable with them (and not always straight people, I know plenty of gay people who would fight tooth and nail and have to be chained to a chair to sit through a show) and that's okay, too. It's not for everybody, and I'm sure for some the sight of a man in drag may dredge up uncomfortable feelings/anxieties about all KINDS of issues from sexuality to gender roles. My feeling has always been this: If you don't enjoy a drag show, then stay home or go somewhere else... believe me, they don't want you at the show if you don't want to be there, either.

As for me personally and how I became involved with the scene, it happened like this: Way back in 1992 I was one of the divas of a Dance Company at Phoenix College in downtown Phoenix (I was 22, thin, cute, had long luxurious blonde hair, a bubble butt and an attitude to match) and because I had been there so long (with my dance-BFF Junio) any NEW gays coming into the Company were put through plenty of bitchy cattiness. I'm not proud of it, that's just how we were at the time.

Anyhow, in the fall semester of 1992 this kinda quiet chunky guy with longish black hair and glasses showed up and joined the Company. He was nice as could be, but because he was new, he had to pay his bullshit from J-Mo and Junio dues. So we were talking one afternoon and he rather timidly asked Junio and myself if we had ever been to any drag shows in town. I had only been going out to the clubs for the last 2 years, and had only peripherally seen a couple of drag shows going on in the background, I wasn't really paying attention because I was too busy, um, pursuing other things. SO, I sorta had, but really hadn't, and because I was a diva I flippantly answered "OH yeah, we've seen 'em, all the bitches here in town are TIRED asses and they're ugly and they all suck and can't dance and we hate them." Or something like that. So my friend (his name is Ted) answers "Oh. Well... I sorta do that."

I wasn't such a cold-hearted bitch that I didn't instantly feel like a complete dick for what I had just said, so I lamely tried to backtrack: "Oh... well, we've never seen YOU, I'm sure YOU'RE really good!" Ted just smiled and invited us to come see him in a show that Sunday night. We agreed but had no real intention of going (probably because by Sunday night we were sometimes still recovering from SATURDAY night).

The very next night, I was hanging out with Junio at a little R&B/house music club called Bobby's (it was my favorite gay bar EVER, cheap drinks and they played the BEST music, alternating between house and all that delicious 90's R&B by SWV, EnVogue, TLC, Jody Watley, etc.) and I happened to glance over and see this really stunning girl with big hair and a lovely outfit smiling at me. I was puzzled, because this was a mostly male gay bar (only ladies inside were lesbians) so who let the chick with the fabulous face in?

And then it dawned on me... it was Ted! I called Junio over and pointed him out and then we both just lost our shit completely. I felt like such a bastard, because I had no idea that the quiet chunky guy we danced with during the week could transform himself into this exotic-looking female creature! Of course, we were drunk, too, and asked a zillion questions and were completely "cracked" as they say in the drag world (i.e. when someone does something that completely astounds or amazes you... or puts you in your place rather righteously... you've been cracked, like if your makeup were to develop a crack down the middle and half your face fell off.) Ted later admitted to me that his appearance at Bobby's was no accident, he wanted to show Junio and I that our judgments were premature and ill-informed.

We attended that Sunday night show, and were blown away by Ted's performances, they were high-energy, fun, he knew his words, he had an awesome closet and TONS of great wigs. And not just him, there were others that we began to see in the shows who had their own unique things, some were more into comedy and slapstick and song parody, while others liked old school 60's and 70's number, and still others were just awesome at bantering with the audience and cracking jokes off-the-cuff.

Last part is: How did I get into dancing backup for them?

After I had known Ted for several months we had become pretty close and dancing for Phoenix College was one of those experiences that cemented our friendship. The spring semester of 1993 I had choreographed this really fun and sexy dance to an oddly hot remake of Vanity 6's "Nasty Girl" (done by a faceless group simply called "Girls Club"). Just after we ended the semester and had our final show (and I couldn't have been more sick of hearing "Nasty Girl") Ted said he was going to be entering a drag pageant in Phoenix, he was trying to compete for Entertainer Of The Year. For his talent number he wanted to use the dance from "Nasty Girl" but revamp it to be just him with myself, Junio, and our other gay in the group (John) dancing backup for him. I was intrigued so we started rehearsing while I reworked it in the way Ted wanted it, and before we knew it, the pageant came and we danced our asses of with him and he won! Such a rush to know I had a hand in helping him with that PLUS I got to see all the behind the scenes stuff that went into being a successful performer (and Ted is a success, with a 25-year drag career on top of his daytime gig as an Assistant VP at a giant bank conglomerate).

SO, that's the reason why I love drag queens, in all the general ways, and all the specific ways that they've touched my life and given me the opportunity to perform and have my choreography be showcased as well. And dammit, being a part of a show is just plain FUN, so who's not down for that?

love, J-Mo :)

Here-here, J-mo! Not sure if you mentioned that you're doing the choreography, but it's absolutely fabulous!!! YOU should win for best choreography, and for reals, consider doing America's Got Talent or something--maybe you wont win, but it could be fun!

XOXOXOXOXOXO

Did anyone notice the color of the crocks the Fat Kid is wearing? Fucking gross!

THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! Thank you for taking the time out to answer my question. I think that I asked it because I was trying to figure out for myself why I love drag queens. I like them especially because they are shiny, glittery and funny as hell. I try to copy their sense of humor. (I am not a gay male. Just a confused female.)

So what you said puts a whole new light on drag queens. I now understand why most of the gay community supports and rallies around them.

I especially like the reason that you explained in part D of your comment. I never really thought about it like that, but now that you put it that way. I think that makes a whole lot of sense.

And if a gay male or even a female needs to hide their sexuality for whatever reason. It sort makes it easier for them. Because hey the really queer people like to put on dresses, fake boobs, and high heels. Or it helps a closeted gay come out because hell if that guy can get up in a wig and dress then I can be who I am.

My friend who sort of does the drag queen thing- he likes to just wear high heels or just a dress. Says that he does it more as a gender fuck kind of thing. Trying to make the point that your gender doesn't have to define who you are. You can be male and still wear heels. Or female and wear a jock strap. Sorry I couldn't think of another example. You aren't defined by your outer appearance- we are just limited to our male and female selves. Not too sure how I feel about that. But that was just another thought of maybe the why of drag queens??

Not sure if I said this already, but I took a look at the pictures you posted from the other, other drag show you were at. And hello beautiful and stunning. I wish I could have the legs of some those queens. You are right about the work it takes to pull off the illusion of looking female. Okay I totally don't mean to be asking another stupid question, but are there some drag queens that aren't gay as well.

"but are there some drag queens that aren't gay as well. "

MMM I would think it would be extremly rare to find a straight drag gueen that would be going to gay bars to perform. You would find possibly a few bisexuals.

About the only straights that would be dressing in women's clothing to perform would be in something more mainstream such as a theater production in which the fact it is a guy wouldn't be apparent to the audience unless they read the play guide. Men dressing up in women's clothes for plays is pretty old tradiation since women for some idiotic reason weren't allowed.

Also the men at a stag party who are dressed as women aren't likely to be gay or acknowledge they are gay.