With 4 hours left, Antonia's bitching to us again about how Dale only cooks Asian food. Obsessed much? Snidely referring to their restaurant as a Chinese restaurant, she notes the team's overall experience with Asian cuisine but doesn't seem that concerned. What she should be worried about is that teammate Yoda is moving in on Nikki's monopoly of homemade pasta -- and it's not looking so good thus far. They didn't think to buy backup pasta at the store, and it sounds like it's too late to change the menu, so if Yoda bones this, they're fucked. Across the kitchen, Evangelass takes a sweaty break from setting up FOH to make the braised short ribs, determined I'm sure to yet again have at least 1 dish on the menu he can take credit for if they lose. Don't think for a second that it's because he's a team player.
Well this would normally be the time Daddy Tom makes an appearance, but with him out of commission today, he had to send in a replacement -- Anthony Bourdain, clad in DT's signature purple and here to bring his "warmer, sunnier disposition" to the table. All right, if we had to give up DT for a week, Bourdain is a pretty damn good replacement. Like DT, he has that older man je ne sais quoi, and he's an asshole to boot. AKA LoLo's dream hunk. No wonder why I'm single. And does it amuse anyone else that Scar doesn't get a promotion, but rather they bring someone else in entirely? The chefs eye him with varying degrees of respect and terror, as Evangelass notes that Bourdain probably knows Asian cuisine better than DT, which may be bad news for Dale and Team Buddha. As if they weren't already trying to scale Everest here.
"Why do I have the bad feeling you guys are going to make haggis sound appetizing by comparison?"
Bourdain stops by Team Warehouse first. After asking them how they divvied up the responsibilities, he gives Richard crap about his smoke-gun science trick shit (which come to think of it, he hasn't pulled in a few weeks now). Richard laughs it off, and Bourdain seems impressed with their plans and progress thus far. Turning to Team Buddha, he makes sure they're all comfortable with the Asian cuisine, and that Dale didn't bitch slap them all into submission. They reassure him that it was a group decision, and Bourdain comments that he's really looking forward to the shrimp laksa, which scares the hell out of Fleasa, who's in charge of that. I don't think he'll be loving laksa anymore after today.
Bourdain leaves the kitchen to give us his thoughts -- he thinks Team Warehouse is deliberately creating modest expectations so it'll be easy to blow those expectations out of the water. He also thinks their menu is rather safe. As for Team Buddha, his opinion is they will either crush the other team if their menu succeeds, or they will fall flat on their asses faster than Bourdain could eat a pig intestine. In other words, their menu is much riskier and more interesting, but at the same time will be harder to pull off. I guess when you already know you're the underdog, you gotta take some risks.
Coming back in, Bourdain announces that each team will get an extra set of hands -- as he trots out Beasty, Nikki, Mutton and Twitch. Now while I think Twitch is the most talented of those four, Antonia's practically clapping her hands in delight at the sight of Nikki, since she can help Team Warehouse save that pasta Yoda's been mangling (ignoring, of course, the fact that Nikki got sent home partially for BAD PASTA). Bourdain gives Team Buddha the first pick since Antonia already got to self-assemble Team Warehouse, and they quickly snatch up Beasty. I'm surprised Evangelass didn't fight for the opportunity to reunite with his Douche Twin, but maybe he had Dale's little midget fingers wrapped around his nuts so tightly he couldn't speak. As for Team Warehouse, Antonia immediately picks Nikki. I feel kinda bad for Twitch, who looked slightly crushed Evangelass didn't pick him. Oh well, he and Mutton can now go back to the loser's lounge and share a bubble bath.
Nikki should just kill herself.
« Real World Hollywood: Delilah and Rick James Associate | Main | Hell's Kitchen: Super Blue! »


Comments (20)
I honestly think they should have a rule that says a chef cannot repeat a dish that they've already used in the competition. It's such a cop out to use the same dishes more then once.
As much as I don't like Dale, I do belive Fleasa should have gone home. She had two dishes that sucked even though she claimed to have done them before.
I'm pulling for Yoda to win with Richard in second. I wonder if his wife lets him get away with his hair looking like that at home?
1 of 20 | Posted by happymomma | Posted on May 23, 2008 7:08 PM
Oh, and I think they need to bring Bourdain back for more episodes. As much as I like Ted Allen, I like Bourdains acerbic wit a lot more. And Lolo I agree with you, there is something weirdly sexy about him.
2 of 20 | Posted by happymomma | Posted on May 23, 2008 7:11 PM
If they can boot Tre as executive chef for being a far superior chef to anyone else, including this season (though Richard is probably on an equal level), then yes, they can boot Dale.
After all Brian didn't cook anything last year and he didn't go home either. So I give Evangelass a pass.
Final four: Richard, Stephanie, Antonia, Evangelass. (Though it should be Twitch.)
3 of 20 | Posted by hutchlover | Posted on May 23, 2008 8:44 PM
my jaw dropped too. the greasy one screwed up 2 dishes, and he screwed up one. had one good dish to boot and a passable dessert. uhm... wtf!?!?! Dale should've been on the final four! blah. If greasy is on the final four, then Top Chef is just letting her stay for drama. such bs!
4 of 20 | Posted by chibby | Posted on May 23, 2008 9:58 PM
Even my 8 year old son thinks Fleasa is greasy and disgusting in the kitchen. And that's saying a lot.
5 of 20 | Posted by lonebutterfly | Posted on May 24, 2008 12:24 PM
Even my 8 year old son thinks Fleasa is greasy and disgusting in the kitchen. And that's saying a lot.
6 of 20 | Posted by lonebutterfly | Posted on May 24, 2008 12:25 PM
oh mister bourdain, bring. it. on. in my mind daddy tom is a sensitive lover, with a lot of eye-gazing, hair petting, and little tiny kisses while bourdain is more of a wild beast -- unbridled passion, bruises and hair pulling. just nix the beating cobra hearts and i'm so there.
i digress...as usual. i was definitely shocked that dale was kicked off this round. he was indeed a great chef, and though the asian theme was overplayed, he was good at it...which is something the fleabag can't claim. i even think his brand of drama was more entertaining than hers. she has one look, one stance, one attitude. he can at least be clever and wears the fuck out of a comfy sweater.
(casual observation: when your hair is 2" long and you put a headband back past your hairline, you're not holding back hair nor stopping sweat, you just want to shine like a friggin dandy on christmas morning).
L2 i think you're absolutely right that no team has ever fared so well in restaurant wars. they usually get their asses handed to them on overpriced pier one plates, but gastro really was impressive all-around. personally i think dick blaze has had it in the bag since the first damn episode, but i would LOVE for one of the ladies to bring it home.
7 of 20 | Posted by k37744 | Posted on May 24, 2008 1:20 PM
um yeah. completely blew my mind.
completely agreed, hutchlover. this is exactly the same as booting tre last season. and i have to say, as much i as understand that the nature of the competition is to judge solely on the task at hand, i really wish they would take a look at track record/potential as well. fleasa, along with being generally nasty as a person and disgusting to watch on tv, is consistently in the bottom three and basically has done nothing all season to impress anybody. meanwhile dale, while being a bit of "a little bitch, bro," and admittedly limited to mainly asian fare, had been consistently impressive for the most part. not only that, this is the second week running that fleasa has displayed her ugly personality in an attempt to undermine her competitors (and team members!!!). all in all, a horrible decision.
k37744--oh god, love it, love it, love it. perfect description of DT and bourdain. now if only they would show up in the same room, at the same time, naked. just a thought. i'll see what i can do.
lolo--great recap as always. my jaw dropped too. but at least we were shown what it would look like if a restaurant wars team actually succeeded!!
8 of 20 | Posted by mrsdaddytom | Posted on May 24, 2008 7:34 PM
p.s. scalegate. "we need you to make pasta" nikki should just kill herself. a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. LMAO lolo you are fabulous.
9 of 20 | Posted by mrsdaddytom | Posted on May 24, 2008 8:24 PM
Three ongoing things that annoy me to the degree that I yell at my tv until the dogs bark, my child wakes up, and my wife glares at me like I've lost my mind:
1. I'm glad you pointed this out... Fleasa's stance before the judges reminds me of a fourth grade bully trying to look intimidating at the playground. It's just laughable that she's not aware of what an asshole she comes across as.
2. Scar's affected speech and behavior drives me fucking nuts.
3. As you also pointed out... Evangelass's shadiness. This guy brings the role of reality tv scumbag to an entirely new level. He puts himself in a position so that he can't be blamed for any of the food, yet is right there to take credit for the shortribs when they're received well by the judges... so typical of this prick. Fuck his retarded hats, his smarmy smile, his lame humor, and his shitty hack cooking. Once again he manipulates his way through another week.
One final comment.. I loved your recap.. always makes me laugh. I think you may be wrong though to give credit to Nikki for the pasta over Yoda. I'm guessing that all Nikki did was continue to make what Yoda had already created and started, therefore she deserves most of the credit. I find it very hard to believe that the pasta would have been even the slightest bit enjoyable to the judges if Nikki had anything to do with the way it was made.
10 of 20 | Posted by vango | Posted on May 25, 2008 11:54 PM
Just wanted to add (I didn't read the entire blog before commenting)... Unfortunately for Dale, and I believe he's definitely worthy of being in the top four, the assigned EC is going to be held accountable for his own dishes and much of what his idiot underlings prepare. He should know this going in, and accepting that position is always a ballsy move that can make or break the chef. It's unfortunate it worked out the way it did, but he paid the price for having a terrible team. When he knew his team consisted of those two shitheels he definitely should have tried to pass EC off on one of them. Evangelass would have known better, but Fleasa would have jumped at the chance and would have been the one to go.
11 of 20 | Posted by vango | Posted on May 26, 2008 12:20 AM
That Anthony Bourdain is one hot piece of ass. I was deeply saddened that his presence on my favorite show was overshadowed by the departure of one of my favorite contestants. sigh. I can't fault him too much, though. He'll always be my much, much, much older man.
12 of 20 | Posted by watermelon | Posted on May 26, 2008 11:10 AM
I am coming in a little late with my comments but I agree with vango completely. Every EC of the losing restaurant team goes home. Just ask Tre. Dale should have known this. He knew they were weak (as did Evangelass) and when Fleasa said she wanted to be EC he should have let her. She would have botched it up and be sent home. I blame Dale mostly for this. His ego got in the way of simple strategery.
And I am so freakin done with Evangelass. He has got to go.
13 of 20 | Posted by el_suavo | Posted on May 26, 2008 4:49 PM
Hey all, I'm the newbie so I'll go right into it. The only reason they kept that greasy 8th grade sheboy from 1993 (believe me there's a Kurt Cobain t-shirt under that chef shirt) is because producers, the judges, and the Bravo wizards are all rooting for a vagina to win. And the chances of Fleasa having a hole over a pole rather than Dale are just a teaspoon, more a like a pinch more likely. The winner will most likely be female meaning Yoda or Antoni-ima-singlemom. I want to Yoda buck up tho. The looks of "where the fuck am I and what the fuck am i doing" are like on a average of 12 to a show. YODA! YOU SIGNED UP FOR A REALITY SHOW WHAT DID YOU EXPECT!? NOW WIN THIS THING. On another note don't ever make me choose btwn Anthony and Big Daddy Tom. We're all adults, they both can have me. Its called sharing. With our busy travel schedules etc, it all should work out fine.
14 of 20 | Posted by ttsnibbly | Posted on May 26, 2008 6:49 PM
Vango pretty much said all I was thinking. But I need to reiterate that I hate, hate, HATE Greasa (sorry, it works better for me than Fleasa, though I'm sure she has those too). She is disgusting, smarmy, false, rude, unable to take criticism, dirty, and oh yeah, disgusting. Take a bath beotch -- your grease is going to cause a flare up.
There. I feel better now.
15 of 20 | Posted by zbird | Posted on May 26, 2008 7:07 PM
Yes vango, they did show Yoda kneading out the doe for the pasta. All Niki had to do was maybe roll it out and then boil it. Even my brother can boil pasta.
I really wished DT was there; he would have put EvaLass on blast and I think he would have asked Dale if he tasted Fleasa's laksa. Then Dale could have said he tasted it and told her it did not taste good.
As for EvaLass didn't they send someone home from Rest-wars before for playing for not doing anything?
16 of 20 | Posted by DreamKeeper | Posted on May 27, 2008 12:17 PM
Hey all, I'm agreein' w everything, cept, I'll stick with DT and small kisses--I can bring the wild passion, and there's more AB to pass around among you all!!! (esp you k37744--Love it when you go off topic!)
This epi was spoiled for me, as I was talking to some co's about top 4, and I said Dale, and they looked at me like I was from Planet Loser, instead of simply just a Tivo watcher who had better things to do at midnight than stay up too late getting angry over this one!!!! IT CAN'T BE ASS IN FINAL 4---NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! (but alas, I guess it can be--can't believe those 2 are still blighting my TV screen!!!! HATE
Thanks for the recap, and I'm w/u on the Butterscotch . . . not even good sounding in title, nevermind, ew, taste! I also felt sorry for Twitch--how could he not pick him! more HATE!!!
But LOVE to you all!
17 of 20 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on May 27, 2008 3:36 PM
okay i think it's time for DT to idly stumble across this site and do 2 things:
a) call a do-over for last week's show, as they completely fucked it up without him there
b) shout out to all the lovely ladies who are seriously enamored of him. and maybe meet us all for coffee. and stuff.
18 of 20 | Posted by mrsdaddytom | Posted on May 28, 2008 7:14 AM
Yeah fleasa so deserved to be booted. BUT. With Dale, I think you live by the sword you die by the sword. Complain complain complain. Don't take a leadership position if you don't have the will, in whatever form it takes, to direct your team. Fleasa the sleaza played Dale perfectly. The harping older sister-wife-mom. Anytime he raised the slightest bit of disagreement, she went into the standard "Calm down!" which is completely dismissive. Get in her face, man! He should have seen it coming and let her take the lead.
19 of 20 | Posted by dredge | Posted on May 28, 2008 9:41 AM
Yeah fleasa so deserved to be booted. BUT. With Dale, I think you live by the sword you die by the sword. Complain complain complain. Don't take a leadership position if you don't have the will, in whatever form it takes, to direct your team. Fleasa the sleaza played Dale perfectly. The harping older sister-wife-mom. Anytime he raised the slightest bit of disagreement, she went into the standard "Calm down!" which is completely dismissive. Get in her face, man! He should have seen it coming and let her take the lead.
20 of 20 | Posted by dredge | Posted on May 28, 2008 9:51 AM