The designers jump up and down when Alexis is introduced as only a group of designers would. The only one who admits he's confused is Ryan. He didn't have his glasses on and wondered how the hell they got Iggy Pop to show up in drag. LOL. The first room the Judges walked through was Felicia and Matt's, which was bo. Ring. Half Frasier Crane/half prison cell. The Judges are silent and onto the next room. Retired Storm said that she didn't want to go out on any limb with this challenge. In that case, good work. Moron. Erik and Carisa's green room came off much better, but so far these designers all seem pretty much the same. Butch's manly getaway was waaaaay off the mark. He even went so far as to put a pair of men's dress shoes under the coffee table. He tries to save his ass by over pitching the natural wood flooring. He tells the Judges that he selected each piece of wood himself and laid them diagonally, lining up the knots purposefully because they're "really cool and hot". The Judges were impressed as they had never seen diagonal flooring before. Oy. How did a disco ball make you think of natural wood and dress shoes? Poor Butch can only be who he is. And he is very, very manly.
Margaret looks like she wants to drag her drunk husband the hell out of this crazy person's house.
"Thanks for having us! Get your coat, Jonathan. Johnathan, get your coat!"
Andrea says she and Ryan did something that was really them and they wanted there to be some "ambiguity" as to whether it was a bedroom or not. Uh....it has a HUGE bed in it. Don't use the word ambiguity just to score points, Andrea. Alexis isn't stupid, she's ironic.
Goil and Elizabeth make the only truly wacked room. The walls are stark and white, except for a huge chalkboard covered in multicolored notes and hearts. There is a sand pit cut into the hardwood floors and a big swing that serves as a sofa and table. This room is a Jeff Stryker poster away from being gay Heaven.
Gay Heaven
Back in the White Room, the Judges take Carisa and Erik to task over their boring room when the inspirational clues were so young and vibrant. Elizabeth and Goil's sandbox and swing got a holla from Kelley, who saw a truly original idea and liked it. Margaret wasn't as enthused. Where was she supposed to sit? She wasn't even gonna consider the swing. Give a girl some options.
The Judges were understandably unimpressed by the Asian room. Heather tries to explain that it was all Retired Storm's idea, but her outfit speaks louder than words, bonding her with Retired Storm in the Judges' minds.
Sisterhood of the Hideous Prints
Ryan and Andrea's room took the inspirational objects a little too literally, which there was some discord with, but ultimately their room was liked. Felicia and Matt had a chic room, but it didn't reflect Alexis. That sounds like a compliment, but it's not. Felicia tries to defend it, but all I hear are uneven eyebrows. Head tilt.
Butch and Wiggum's room got mixed reviews. It was obviously off the mark now that they knew they should have been aiming for Tranny Delight, but Jonathan liked the "narrative" of the shoes under the table. What? He was more interested in the drama. Butch admitted that they failed at teamwork, and even though the Wiggum kid copped to hating Butch, he felt both their points of view were on display. 50/50? Butch comes back with 70/30, and the Wiggum kid asks "How do you argue with a narcissist?" Still, he tries. Butch says his skin is crawling. You can still feel it? He's never been exposed to such a useless person. Wiggum says it's not fair to say he doesn't know what he's doing just because he doesn't know how to use a paint roller. Yes it is. Instead of slapping him, Johnathan gently tries to explain that every designer has to get their hands dirty and Wiggum whines "my hands are dirty!" Next time I am chased by a bunch of frat boys with baseball bats, I'm blaming these two. They are like a pro gay-bashing ad. I wanted to beat myself up. Where's Rosie O'Donnell when you need her?
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Comments (20)
Hey guys! Sorry for the late-ass recap.
This week I return to my regular Sunday deadline. HEART
1 of 20 | Posted by Flipit
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Posted on February 6, 2007 6:09 PM
By the way, Flipit, you forgot to mention one of Arquette's best movies is actually one of my favorite movies ever: Last Exit to Brooklyn. It actually is one of "the tranny's" best acted portrayals. It also stars Ricki Lake and Jerry Orbach in minor roles...
2 of 20 | Posted by slutty_whore
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Posted on February 6, 2007 7:02 PM
I am really having a hard time listening to Todd Oldham...he keeps putting the accent on the wrong words in his sentences. It has a weird lilt to it that just hurts my ears. And he is quite dull.
I hope that all the challenges aren't 50K budgets...I would like to see a little "design a bathroom and for a budget you have bus tokens" or "design a jail cell and to get the paint you have to barter using two cartons of cigs."
Alexis is the prettiest Arquette. How sad is that?!
hb
3 of 20 | Posted by HoneyBunny
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Posted on February 6, 2007 7:12 PM
By the way, Flipit, with all the controversy on the Top Chef boards, I hope you haven't stopped the opening preamble because of what the people said.
4 of 20 | Posted by slutty_whore
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Posted on February 6, 2007 7:25 PM
You're the bestest. Wax them brows!
5 of 20 | Posted by photochild
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Posted on February 6, 2007 8:02 PM
awe Flipit, I so want to hear your story about the wedding, the bowl and Cousin B......don't leave your life out of the recaps, it is what has endeared you to us....
I would like to know what 5 items you would have given to have them design you a room too>>> pretty please.
I think in time this show will capture us all.... if they kick 2 every week it should go quick too!
6 of 20 | Posted by GIFFORDSAZ
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Posted on February 6, 2007 8:12 PM
And there is no need to apologize... remember this was a two-fer week, Top Chef and Top Design.....you must have had no life last week end!
7 of 20 | Posted by GIFFORDSAZ
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Posted on February 6, 2007 8:31 PM
Thanks for the well wishes, all! Just left out the "foam" (hehe, dredge) this week cuz I was already at 8 pages and late. Next week back to foam form. Or this week I should say.
And Giff:
a box of hostess chocolate glazed donuts
a tivo
a smelly Jack Russell
a crystal ashtray
paper clip covered in tar
GO!
8 of 20 | Posted by Flipit
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Posted on February 6, 2007 11:04 PM
I had a hard time watching this show, Todd was just creeping me out. He sounded like Mr. Rogers on crack!! I got through it though and loved your recap. Lisa/Storm that was right on the money. A couple of months ago, when I found out "lost" was moving to 10pm, I was freaking out. But I see I don't have to worry anymore...
9 of 20 | Posted by Featherhead
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Posted on February 7, 2007 7:26 AM
Well, we won't have to wait until the next Padma-tastrophe to get a Flipit review! I am glad to see see that B-side and the like did not put Flipit out on the TVGasm unemployment line. As always, great job Flipit.
I think there is a factory for the Bravo reality shows. Because the life has not been squeezed out of this formula, there will be another one in additon to Top Design. The one is a hair show called "Shear Genius" I think. It's nice to see that Bravo will keep those gay viewers!
As for Top Design, I HATE Wiggam and Butch but they are going to make this show interesting (like the monkey). The judges are going to be good, especially Margaret. I reserve judgement on the other designers for at least another episode.
10 of 20 | Posted by HokieJM
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Posted on February 7, 2007 8:51 AM
Aww, you guys don't like Todd Oldham? He seems like such a nice guy!
11 of 20 | Posted by Rock Star
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Posted on February 7, 2007 8:53 AM
well, i for one, am happy for this show b/c it will only mean more Flipit!! the recap was so enjoyable, much more entertaining than the show. Luv the Wiggum & Storm monikors, loved how you ripped the mean Butch a new one---i think we should nickname the Skateboarder dude, 'Squiggy', as he reminds me of the dude from Laverne & Shirley. I think this show will be a little like Project Runway, in that only the truly wacky designs will be lauded over --- the stuff you & i would pick will not be what wins. I would never pick the Kitty Litter room for my house (THAT was $50K??!! didn't even spring for paint!!)
Loved the comment abt Todd O. being like a Mr Rogers on crack! and #s) 4 & 6 -- your comments were so sweet! Flipit, can u feel the luv?! your fans heart u back!
12 of 20 | Posted by Tati
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Posted on February 7, 2007 9:04 AM
Flipit, you are Snarktastic! Second, the minute Todd O. started to speak I screamed "PADMA!!!" in horror at the TV and my sis was like "No, that's just his gay lisp". By the way, isn't Margaret so Miranda Priestly? I was expecting "That's all" any minute while she was critiquing...
13 of 20 | Posted by Justine
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Posted on February 7, 2007 12:11 PM
Flipit I totally agree with you about Buddha rape, it must be stopped. Lol
14 of 20 | Posted by angiemarie
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Posted on February 7, 2007 12:12 PM
Everyone looks so much younger than their age. Goil is so cute, I'll be rooting for him!
15 of 20 | Posted by couchpotato
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Posted on February 7, 2007 12:45 PM
I love you Flipit! I'm usually just a lurker on here, but I wanted to tell you that I lurved your stories at the beginning of your recaps. Don't give them up! I'm sure there are many life lessons to be learned through Top Design.
16 of 20 | Posted by mandarine688
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Posted on February 7, 2007 1:43 PM
Flipit you are fab, I was so excited to see a Top Design recap posted! I agree with everyone else in that I'm very glad you're back with more post-Top Chef recaps
I think you should seriously consider taking over My Super Sweet Sixteen recaps, I think your family flashbacks would bode well at the beginning of 16-year-old birthday parties...
seriously do it!
17 of 20 | Posted by cherin
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Posted on February 7, 2007 2:24 PM
I know that this is gay-friendly BRAVO, but couldn't they do better than Alexis Arquette? What's next, a confetti-strewn room for Rip Taylor?
18 of 20 | Posted by Foxbase Alpha
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Posted on February 7, 2007 4:25 PM
love the recap flipit!
are the pictures oddly stretched out in all flipit recaps for anyone else? not a big deal, but everyone looks extra wide.
19 of 20 | Posted by yaytv
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Posted on February 7, 2007 6:11 PM
when Alexis was "Alex" Arquette he was the Boy George singer in The Wedding Singer. I liked him better as a he, but I agree SHE should definitely hit up her sis-in-law for a job on Dirt.
I didn't like any of their rooms. They just didn't look comfortable, and what about ones with no TV's? 50K and no big-screen? Ridiculous!
great job Flipit! :)
20 of 20 | Posted by zoobabe
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Posted on February 8, 2007 4:57 AM