I was pessed to see Natalie go. I think Silver Spoons tries to quit next week, do you? Great recap, J-Mo. Kelly's socks totally nailed the "I'm old now so I have to wear shocking fashion to feel relevent" vibe.

Wow, J-Mo, you're now cranking them out faster than I can read them! Thank god the weekend is here and that's when I totally abdicate any housework in favor of reading recaps, so I'll have time to catch up.

I haven't read it yet, but hey, hilarious recap, LOLed, LMAOed, etc. (because since I started reading your stuff they have been and I have been 100% of the time, hmmmmm... why wait.)

I was going to comment on the last recap about how now I can't think of Eddie without picturing him as a cockatoo (thanks, juddfan), but in that last episode it was a cockatoo with particularly homicidal-looking beady eyes - and now? After this episode? Now he still annoys the life out of me but he makes me feel that his misguided attempts at snark are just desperate neediness and not simple evil. He had to go and be all classy and OK when Ondine spilled crap all over his room? He had to actually mention that he likes everyone's sense of humor (well, his own most of all, I bet)? Bravo editors, this is reality TV, and if you start making me feel that the villain is not 100% horrible my head will explode. There's no room for subtlety in reality TV!!!!!! I am going to cry.

Side note: why are recaps disappearing? The one for the tricrapathlon disappeared for a while. A couple of the latest ANTM's are gone. What's up?

I forgot to add, now that Natalie's gone, I won't have this itch to throw a bucket of water at my TV every time she's on screen. Is that how much makeup the kids nowadays are wearing? Yeah, I'm old too, just a couple of years younger than Kelly socks-with-pumps, but thank god I don't feel the need to be relevant with shocking fashion. The kids in my neighborhood would throw rocks at me.

HA! So subliminal, Mr. J-Mo: "but I don't have the sixty G's for a semester at FIDM... or the sixty years it would take me to finish." But it seems like you got this recap up in sixty seconds! :)

You, sir, are funny. I would run sixty miles just to see you. Seriously.

J-Mo,
You and Flipit are officially my favorite recapists EVER!

Nat seemed like a nice girl, but her room was hideous. Her wall paper looked like shitty dollar store wrapping paper and her futuristic lever was literally a door knob slapped on the wall.

Sad Panda Andrea needs to take a Xanax and get over 2 week Ricky Schroder seperation anxiety.

Also did anyone else notice the last two week that Black Eye Nathan trys to kiss Pretty Boy Preston on the mouth when the two of them and Eddie DoucheRoss "celebrate" their non-elimination???

Great recap as usual..Nana with the gun cracked me up.
Natalie seemed like a sweet girl but some of those outfits she wore when bending over showed me more than I wanted to see.
As much as Eddie A$$hat declares that he wants to win without immunity, you can see it just about kills him when others are praised for their work. He either has an ego ten times larger than normal or none at all and all the posturing and posing is making up for a total lack of self esteem.
Martha, time to reevaluate your employees.

I haven't finished reading the recap yet, but had to say:

Eddie FunkyFingeRoss.... LOVES IT!!!

Ah yes, Mr. Mo, I can think of at least sixty reasons why you're my favorite design expert...

I thought they really toned down the asshole edit on Sphincter Face this week --maybe the editors have been reading the comments here and realized they went overboard? But he was portrayed as much less assoholic this episode -- or they left in the parts where, after saying something stupidly egoistical, he actually laughs at himself for saying it.

And then, yeah, throughout the whole show, he was shown as being the most helpful, encouraging and positive to and about everyone else.

I mean, I'm not saying he isn't a twat, but I'm betting he's aware of it and laughs at himself as much as anyone else --which would make him much more tolerable.

But I love that wacko Kelly gal. Wish they'd show more of her - does she have her own show somewhere?

Have to say, as a creative type who likes the dress the part (mine is of the slob-artist variety) , I only hang out with non-creative types who dress like normal people.

Otherwise you get what happens when you put those four weirdos (Kelly, the Icon potter, Jackie-O Icepop and the Shemale-voiced Brit) together-- it becomes a silly costume competition.

J-Mo -- Your recaps make me LOL more than any others ANYWHERE -- it's hard to top the artichoke lamp/toilet scrubber but Eddie's birth defect center (or the Smooth Criminal rug) might have done it. Honestly, I'm often unmoved by many recappers who elicit mucho kudos from others but your snark I can't resist! I enjoy TD anyway sans comments; however you make it even more fun. Now don't you want to say a bit more about Kelly's turban? THAT did make me chortle when she came on-screen.

Oh yeah, I forgot: what the hell is klooning anyway?

Or is it kluning?

Or was he saying Clooney?

J-Mo;

Awes!!

PrettyBoy Preston's bare back was almost as nice as seeing his bare chest, but not quite. Those white pants showed off his nice butt though - it's not as nice as my BF's, but nice just the same. Eddie must be blind to only want his lips. Speaking of Preston ... and lips ... hmmmm ... I can think of two ways that could work.

I agree with you, Eddie AssholeRoss' parents must be freakin' GORGEOUS! And PrettyBoy will always one-up Eddie in anything, 'cuz he's such a douche. FAIL!

Nat's carpenter SO was ogling her "bewbs" ... he wanted to "nail" something real bad ... and not the hydraulic floor!

You say you have to hold your breath when you tie your shoes - at least you can tie your own - I resorted to Velcro straps!

Great recap, as always.

Lots O' Love

Dahling J-Mo,

I finally got a free minute, and I am so happy to have your recap to read while I relax:)

I have a fantasy that Tim Gunn will kidnap Kelly W to be a victim on his "Guide to Style." I would die to watch that Macy's shopping trip...

I still miss Whatisit, but Nathan is still worth routing for.

Thank you so much for writing these awesome recaps, they definitely make my International Food, Mocha Mint coffee moments a wonderful experience.

Hugs,
Yenta

Are you still in LA, J-mo??? I should take you and or Flip to dinner while you're in my hood!!!

Missed the beginning on this one, so thanks for the knee touching info on Daddy Plumber . . . wish they'd shown the beer after.

For myself, I hate all that low to the ground shit, it's hard enough to climb in and out of my car, I don't want to continue the trend when I get home to my scratching post coffee table (as if my cats would allow that!)

I didn't like any of this stuff, except the concept, but the color on my TV is just sooo bad, I've given up trying to judge and just wait for your caps. that was a fug rug you singled out.

I was thinking our cockatoo would be the quitah, since he's already on top and doesn't need to win . . . Even tough Spoon's is over her head, she seems willing to go wild and go out in a blaze of tacky rather than a lilt in beige. I'm sure the more screen time Ricky gets on the back of his head, the better . . . (too funny on the 25 minute drive!)

Lastly, now I know why I've converted to J-mo-ism,
" I could smell the whiskey on his breathe, and his razor stubble when he kissed me, and I liked it, I liked it!!!!!"

oldmomoftoddlerboys... thank you, and yeah, I'm soooo turned off by socks with pumps (although I seem to remember seeing Madonna wearing that look in the early 80's)...

sayhuh... darlin' read at your leisure, I've just been under some deadlines that have forced me to work faster than normal. I can't figure out why Eddie feels he has to be such a bitch all the time, needy or not, it's just fugly on him, and I'm praying for the karmic wheel to crush him at some point. And girl, yes, the kids DO wear that much makeup these days, I guess it's easier to spackle over imperfections than embrace them, but maybe Natalie was getting up so early she had to put her face on in the dark and didn't realize how much she was using? I dunno. As far as disappearing recaps go, so far all of mine have appeared, as for ANTM, you'd have to axe Flipit, he has the know-how on that stuff... thanks for the read!

zbird... DAMN! You caught on, LOL! You knew I couldn't leave that bullshit complaint against Flipit alone, right? Love!

ivegotthesquircs... Wow, that is an amazing compliment, I am so honored to be considered in the same stratosphere as Flipit, I think he's so much damn funnier than I am, it makes me squirc, too! Seriously, though, thank you, and NO I totally missed Nathan trying to get a piece of the Luscious Prettyboy! Ooooh!

skies... LOL, google image search is the greatest when you ask it just the right key words, ain't it? I agree with you, I think it's time for Martha to downsize...

Snootchy Bootches... still LOVE your nickname! And thank you, you are too kind!

itchy... awww, such love, I am so not worthy of! I am glad someone is finding love for Eddie, because I have searched my soul and cannot find a molecule in my heart for him... and I am loving "She-Male Voiced Brit!"... Kelly needs her own Tim Gunn-style show to go in and revamp crappy homes and apartments decorated badly... are you listening Bravo?

bfish... I am humbled by your love... THANK you, I am glad you're enjoying this crazy-ass show with us! I would have commented on Kelly's turban, but I couldn't get past the socks!

ArizonaTom... if your BF has a nicer ass than Preston's, then he is a lucky man indeed (and so are you, I'd say). Sorry to hear about the velcro, but at least that's a step above having to resort to slip-ons ONLY, right? Plus, some people have no feet, so we should not complain, right?

Yenta-honey... thank you for the kudos! Could we possibly be working more diametrically opposed shows? I don't think so! Yours is so masculine mine is afraid to be posted right next to it for fear of getting beat down, LOL!

juddfan... Awww, I'm sorry, I was only in L.A. for a short weekend to get away from home for a bit (which is why this recap was so fast, I didn't want it hanging over my head all weekend long)... and I'm SO glad you caught the movie reference... here's another favorite quote... "Your dirtypillows are showing!" "They're called 'breasts' momma... and every woman has them!"

thanks for all the comments, guys, you make me feel all warm and giggly on the inside!

love, J-Mo :)