The latest episode began on a semi-pastoral note: Alex and his new sidekick Cory trekked down to a river to go fishing. It was kind of heartwarming, except for the fact that this particular fishing hole seemed to be located off the shoulder of I-95. Plus, I wouldn't necessarily call the brown water some of Alabama's finest. Nevertheless, the two guys passed the time talking about Kristin and how things were going on that front. Alex said all was good, but unfortunately, they'd been fighting a lot. So Alex, the proper answer would be "all wasn't good."

We then saw a passing flock of ducklings, who I think were supposed to represent something or another -- fertility? Happiness? Football? I like to leave the metaphorical nature imagery to Mark Burnett and his legion of crabs, rats, and snakes.

Anyway, Cory then reiterated some advice his father had previously given Alex, and that was that when they reach college, Alex had "better keep your damn pants zipped up 'til you gotta pee." What if he needed to take a dump? Could he unzip them then? I'm sorry, I don't get Southern truisms.

As for this great fishing endeavor, we finally saw some action on Alex's rod. His big catch of the day? A stick. Bravo, good sir. To be fair, the only thing I've ever caught while fishing has been a twig, rings for a six-pack, and some sort of leafy conglomeration.

A few days later at the lunch room, we learned officially that it was playoffs time and that the team was one game away from the state finals. Unfortunately, star cheerleader and nagging girlfriend Kristin wouldn't be able to attend this week's playoff game because she had to go to Pennsylvania for Thanksgiving. Seemed kind of random, but then we learned it was to visit her grandparents. But why don't they just come down to Hoover? "Because they're both REALLY SICK!" Kristin snapped at Alex when he joked about her lack of support. Yes, apparently Kristin's grandparents both had cancer, which means that I really can't make jokes anymore. Blast!

Well, after Kristin explained this about five times, Max suddenly turned to her and sincerely asked, "Wait, where you going?" God, keep up with the story, people! It's not that hard! Her grandparents have cancer, and she's visiting them in Pennsylvania for Thanksgiving. ENOUGH.

Afterwards, we then saw Max walking in the hallway, staring out the window at the rain falling. "Rainy days make me so sad and depressed," he said. "I just want to curl up in a little ball and cry." Wow. Methinks young Max might be in need of some therapy. That was instantly the most depressing moment of the entire series.

In practice, we learned the team would be facing "Old Mountain" (oh wait, it was Oak Mountain), who were known for their great defensive football. Ah, but could they spit like Propst? I THINK NOT. Max then rambled on about how the defensive coordinator, Coach Pruitt, had taught him so much stuff about football -- although, clearly nothing about asparagus.

Meanwhile, over on the sideline was Max's stepfather who told us that Max was only a pretty good player, not great. He HATES supporting his stepson!